It is a new world out there, a world where women are speaking out against gender-traditional roles. Stating that they are more than baby-making machines and they are not going to stand for it anymore. Some women may be confused, because they didn’t actually realize there was a problem. That the idea is that people should just do what they want and not care what anyone thinks. Well, those are the nice and respectable woman, and they are not part of the problem so would not be able to understand it.

For a lot of women, the truth is that if they are in an age where they would be considered marriage material, or in their more fertile years they constantly have to deal with the comments. Comments about how their clock is ticking, asking when they are having children and even telling them that they are selfish for not wanting to have children. It is just as ridiculous as it sounds.

However, if people are ‘allowed’ to make comments to women about why they should have children, then shouldn’t there also be comments about why women should not have anymore children? There has to be some valid reasons. Well, there is. They range from medical to personal, but they are all just as valid at telling us when a woman may just be done reproducing.

The word that immediately came to mind when reading this was probably; “rude.” That this article is going to be full of superficial and petty reasons why a woman should not have any more children. That is not the case, we have 12 legitimate concerns regarding whether a woman should consider having more children.

12 A Non-Contracting Uterus

When a woman is making the decision to expand her family, she must take into consideration her health. Pregnancy and childbirth is not something to be taken lightly. It takes a huge toll on a woman, and a rough journey could hurt a woman’s chances of carrying another baby. A non-contracting uterus, or atony of the uterus, makes this very difficult.

Normally after a woman gives birth, the uterus starts to shrink back to its original size (or a close version of it). When a woman has a non-contracting uterus, it means that the uterus does not shrink back. This can cause excessive bleeding and hemorrhage which can be very dangerous and even fatal if not treated right away. There are many causes of this, including prolonged labour, very fast labour and use of some inducing medications. What makes this dangerous for any future pregnancy is that it is bound to happen again in subsequent childbirth’s and it is not a risk to be taken lightly.

11 How You Look Is Too Important To You

Pregnancy changes you, and not just mentally. It can have permanent changes to your body, and a woman needs to expect this to happen and be OK with it. Most women accept this when they make the decision to have children. There may be some grunts and complaints along the way, but they know and understand that what comes at the end is more than worth it. Sure, she may still have moments where she wishes that she could drop that baby weight, but she would never take back her decision.

There are women out there who just can not seem to get over how much pregnancy has changed their body, and they go as far as to let it take over their life. They rant and rave about what this baby has done to their body, and all that is going to do is to create feelings of resentment and regret. If you regret having children because of what they have done to your body, you really should not be having any more.

10 Can’t Give Up Your Party Life

Along with our physical appearance, there are a lot of things that change when we decide to bring life into this world. There are a lot of rules for pregnant women, and they are there for the safety and health of your child. This means that mom must make sacrifices for a while. This means her party days are probably over for a bit, because it is no fun to go to a bar and order water. Even when the baby is born, mom will not be able to immediately jump back into her partying lifestyle.

There is nothing wrong with going out and having fun, but one must understand that this ends when that baby comes. If mom can not give it up, then having more children is probably not the best idea. We talk a lot about feelings of resentment and regret, because it is relevant. Why is it relevant? Because children completely change your life, and if you are not willing to change what you look like or what you love to do, then it is better to never have to make that change to begin with.

9 They Can't Stand Their Children

It is impossible for our brains to comprehend something that we ourselves would never understand. That is why most people can not understand how a mother could hate their children. We go as far as to say it is not true, and then bash them for how they feel. Hate is a strong word, and most mothers do not hate their children, but there are a lot of women out there who are torn.

They see their children as an obstacle. They miss their life before children, and while this happens to most moms, it is usually a fleeting thought that goes just as quickly as it came. There are moms out there who can not shake this feeling and it ends up coming out in the form of resenting their children. It could also be due to some hidden mental illness and possible postpartum depression, but we will discuss that further in a later section. Regardless of the cause, if this is how a mom feels about the child(ren) she already has, there is no reason why she should have another one any time soon.

8 A Positive Pregnancy Test Terrifies Them

Pregnancy tests are funny things. They can be a source of joy or terror. If you are a woman who is trying to conceive, there is nothing better than seeing those two pink lines. Those two pink lines mean a little bit more to women who are struggling with infertility. If you are not trying to get pregnant, the two pink lines will haunt your nightmares. Either way, pregnancy tests elicit a lot of emotions. Anticipation, excitement and anxiety are all par for the course.

If the mere thought of a positive pregnancy test sends you into a panic attack, then chances are the result should be negative. If a woman can not get past all the negative thoughts she has when it comes to the possibility that the test may be positive, she needs to rethink her strategies for not getting pregnant. The pregnancy test is just the beginning, and things are about to get more serious when that baby comes around, and those feelings of resentment and fear may not just go away.

7 Out Of Control Mental Illness

This one falls into a blurred line area. Mental illness has always had a stigma attached to it, and we are trying to fight that every day. There are thousands, possibly millions, of moms out there who are living with a mental illness and are managing parenthood just fine. Mental illness by itself is not a reason to never have children, but it can be a warning sign. Mental health is a tricky thing, and it needs to be treated either by medication or therapy in order to live a productive life.

If mom is dealing with some mental health concerns that have gone out of control, whether she is refusing medication or refusing to see she has a problem, then she needs to put a hold on having any more children. Those who have a history of depression and anxiety have a higher chance of suffering with postpartum depression. We all know how serious PPD can be, so it is important to get the care you need, because if you don’t care for you, you can not care for anyone else.

6 Existing Child Is Lonely

Not all reasons for why women should stop having children have to do with physical danger to mom or future babies, sometimes it is all about how mom treats the children she already has. One may think that a baby who is showing signs of being lonely is just longing for a sibling to play with, and that it would actually mean that mom should have more children. Let’s not put the cart in front of the horse here, and let’s ask ourselves why the baby is feeling lonely?

Is mom being attentive to the baby’s needs? Are his basic necessities being met? Is he being engaged through bonding and playtime? The person whose job it is to address all of these needs does not belong to a sibling, it falls on mom. Mom needs to meet all of their baby's needs, but that doesn’t just mean feeding and changing diapers, it also means meeting their emotional needs. Making sure that your baby feels loved and protected is one of the most important things that a mom could do, and if she is failing at doing this for one, adding another one may not be the best idea.

5 Too Many Times Under The Knife

A lot of babies are born via C-section, and that is not a bad thing. C-sections have saved (probably) millions of moms and their little ones and there are a lot of people out there who are thankful for their existence. However, we must remember, that a C-section is a major surgery. That is how it is classified in the medical world, and with any major surgery comes some pretty major risks. When a mom must have a C-section for her first, chances are that she will need to continue to have the procedure for all her future pregnancies. There are women out there who are able to have a successful vaginal birth after a C-section but it’s not for everyone.

There does reach a point where a mom can have too many C-sections, and to endure any more would put mom at serious risk. The more C-sections a mom has, the higher her risk of something going very wrong. Some of these risks include; scar tissue, bowel/bladder injuries, heavy bleeding and problems with the placenta. It reaches a point where a woman really needs to decide if it is worth having more children if she has maxed out her C-section number. Chances are she should quit while she is ahead.

4 Dangerous Pregnancy

Pregnancy is not a walk in the park. It can be very hard on a woman’s body and it doesn’t come without risk to mom’s future health. There are many conditions that can make a woman very ill when she is pregnant and even require hospitalization. Preeclampsia is a serious condition that can occur when pregnant, and it involves a dangerously high blood pressure plus the failure of an organ. This can make pregnancy very difficult and dangerous. Normally, women who have this condition must be induced as the only cure is to deliver the child.

Even if mom does not have a life-threatening condition while pregnant, there are certain things that can turn her off pregnancy. Gestational diabetes, anemia as well as severe morning sickness can all make life miserable for mom when she is carrying her child, and if she has a chance of having any issues with any further pregnancy she may be better off not continuing to have children.

3 “Show Me The Money!”

Children are not cheap, they are quite expensive. It is estimated that the average couple will spend about $25,000 a year on their infant. This is, of course, an estimate and it will vary from family to family. Even if your number is nowhere close to that it doesn’t change the fact that children cost money. If a mom is struggling financially and is having a hard time supporting the family she has now, it may be time to not have any more children.

Money is not the most important thing in life, we all know that. However, it takes money to make sure a child has all of their needs met. If mom can not breastfeed than she needs to buy formula. There are always diapers, wipes and clothes to purchase. What happens if your child falls ill and you live in a country that does not have universal health care, or you do not have private insurance. These are all factors that we must think about when we are ready to bring a baby into the world.

2 Your Relationship Belongs On Dr. Phil!

We have to think about the kind of world we are bringing our children in to. Is it into a loving and warm home, or is it to one full of fights and disagreements? If it is the latter, then it is probably time you rethink your need for another child. If you are in an unhappy, hostile relationship with your spouse, partner or even family you live with, then there is no reason to bring another person into this mix.

As much as we would like to say and think that our adult problems have nothing to do with our children, they actually do. A child who grows up around constant arguing and fighting is not going to feel like they have a safe and secure home. A place that is supposed to be the one place they can trust to find love and compassion. Children are also more aware than we give them credit for, so even if we think that we are doing the best job at hiding it from them, chances are that they know exactly what is going on.

1 CPS Has You On Speed Dial

Everyone is afraid of CPS (or CAS in Canada). Child Protection Services may be a little intimidating, but they serve an important role. They help hundreds and thousands of children find safe homes where they can live a productive and happy life. No one likes to call CPS on anyone, no one likes when CPS shows up at their door and (believe it or not) CPS does not want to be at anyone’s door. It happens though, children all over the world are growing up in homes where neglect is prevalent.

If you have found yourself involved in CPS for whatever reason, it is best to hold off on having any more children. At the very least, until all the issues get sorted out. Depending on the severity of the issue at hand, the baby you decided to make could be taken away from you right at birth. It is better to work with them and build a plan that would include you having more children, if that is really what should happen.

Sources: nichd.nih.gov, mayoclinic.org, healthline.com