Since you're born with the inner trait that entails you being attracted to the opposite sex, same sex, or even both, your child will realize his or her attraction at some point. And it won't be because of their environment or anything you say or do. If you're wondering what to do if your child is gay, the short answer is nothing. You treat them with just as much love as you'd been treating them with because they're still your child, right?
If you simply suspect that your child is gay, there are still sure to be plenty of thoughts and questions running through your mind and that's totally normal. While it's important to treat your son or daughter the same way, it's equally as important to remember that they are probably filled with the same sorts of questions.
If you suspect that your child is gay, the first thing to absolutely not do is force them to admit to it. If they are gay, the coming out process will be something they do on their own, when they're ready. It isn't something that can be rushed or pulled out of them. And if you suspect that your son or daughter is gay and they aren't, but come right out and suggest it, you're sure to bring a certain level of discomfort to them.
To be the more sensitive mom or dad for your kid, it's important to heed this advice about what to not say to them if you suspect they might be gay.
12 Ask Them Outright If They're Gay
Since the process of coming out is one that should be met with sensitivity and enough knowledge to face it properly, flat out asking your child if they're gay is never a good idea. This is especially true if you only suspect that your child is gay, without any of the necessary confirmation.
11 Assume It's Just A Phase
If your child is gay or is struggling with the possibility that they are, it's incredibly important to take it seriously. Maybe your child is confused or unsure of their sexual orientation, whether it be leaning toward a hetero or homosexual slant, but regardless you should never assume that what they're feeling is a phase.
10 Make Derogatory Jokes
This should go without saying, but whether your child is heterosexual or you suspect that they're actually gay, derogatory jokes are a total no-no. They have no real purpose and they sound insulting and make everyone feel uncomfortable, regardless of their sexual orientation.
9 Treat Them Differently
Regardless of your child's sexual orientation or even suspected orientation, they're still your child. They're still the little girl or boy who you've chased around the house, trying to get a diaper on, and they are still the same overall person. A sexual orientation changes nothing.
8 Tell Other People Your Child Is Gay
If you simply suspect your child is gay, the last thing you need to be doing is going around telling everyone that your son or daughter is, in fact, a homosexual. You have no confirmation of it, so the best thing to do is wait for your child to come to you when they are comfortable doing so.
7 Act Like It's The End Of Your World
Suspecting that your child is attracted to their gender just means that now you know they aren't attracted to the opposite sex. For all intents and purposes, it could have gone either way, right? It doesn't mean anything negative, just that you're getting to know your child that much deeper.
6 Seek Counseling For Your Child
Even if your child is gay, it isn't something that can be "prayed away" or something that requires therapy. So if you only suspect your child's sexual orientation, counseling is definitely unnecessary. Nothing has even been confirmed yet, so pump the breaks and take a few giant steps back.
5 Try To Keep Them Away From Same Sex Kids
Suspecting that your child is gay doesn't mean that they are suddenly that much more likely to get handsy with other kids. In fact, promoting all sorts of friendships for them is important at any age for your child.
4 Try To Push Them Into Being Attracted To The Opposite Sex
Like we said, sexual orientation is something your child is born with and doesn't change at the drop of a hat. Realistically speaking, it just can't, it doesn't work that way. So trying to convince them that they're attracted to the opposite sex when you suspect that they may be gay is just a waste of time.
3 Tell Your Child They're Going To Hell
How this benefits your child, or even you for that matter, is a true wonder. If you suspect your child is gay, try to remember that since they're still your child, there is no reason to scare them into being straight. Which, you guessed it, isn't even a real thing.
2 Urge Them Not To "Act Gay"
This goes right up there with the unnecessary derogatory jokes or comments. No child should have the idea of "acting gay" promoted to them, least of all in a situation where you think your child is gay.
1 Think Of Them Any Differently Than Before
Your son or daughter is still just that. Your child, your baby, and your little one. Having a suspicion that they're gay doesn't change that and thinking of them as different now that you suspect they're gay doesn't help either of you. If you suspect your child is gay, hold them close and continue to cultivate your relationship with them. Don't push them away or make assumptions. Instead, continue to be there for them as only a parent can.