By the time mom makes it to the end of her pregnancy, she's just ready to have the baby. Regardless of the fears she may harbor about labor pain, she wants to meet her child, and she wants to not be pregnant anymore. There comes a point where it's just time to get it over with.
What mom may not know is that labor is not only painful. It can be downright embarrassing. After months of prenatal appointments and doctors poking around mom's business to check for dilation, she might think there's nothing that could cause her embarrassment. She would be wrong.
Labor is beautiful and hard and often very, very embarrassing. Mom may not actually care because she is just focused on making it to the end, but many women look back and feel strange thinking about all of the things that occurred when they were trying to bring their babies into the world.
Some of these issues mom may not even be aware of, while others will stick in her mind forevermore. Labor and delivery give us memories that will last, and not just the one where we meet the baby for the first time.
The good news is doctors and midwives have seen it all, so there's nothing mom can throw at them during labor that is going to be new. She may be humiliated by some of the events that occur, but medical professionals are used to the sounds, smells, and nudity involved with labor.
13Number Two During Labor
One of the biggest fears many women have when thinking about labor is the number two fear. Will mom poop while she's giving birth? The easy answer is probably.
Pooping during birth is not uncommon because the muscles mom is using to push out the baby are also the ones she uses to poop. Plus, pushing out a human is a pretty intense experience that mom can't hold back on while performing. Pushing that hard with the weight of a baby on our colon is a recipe for labor poo disaster if there ever was one.
The good news is that women who have epidurals may not even know they have pooped. The bad news is everyone else in the room will know they did. However, mom really doesn't need to be worried, even if she does poop, because this is something that happens to many women, and it's totally normal.
12Number One During Labor
After the fear of doing a number two, the fear of going number one may not be as profound. However, many women do worry about sprinkling their doctors with golden showers while giving birth. Given how much women have to pee while pregnant, it makes sense that this concern would carry over to delivery.
Women do pee while in labor because the baby continues to press down on the bladder, and pushing out a child causes pushing in general in the lower region. Plus, women are usually pumped full of IV fluids during labor, and that gives them a ton of liquid ammo to release on unsuspecting doctors coming in to do cervical checks.
Mom will likely pee, and probably more than once. However, women who have epidurals will end up with catheters, so they won't make puddles around the room. Women without catheters still shouldn't stress. This is just another crazy part of birthing.
11Unique Labor Sounds
Regardless of what Tom Cruise thinks when he imagines labor, women really aren't supposed to be completely silent unless they want to be. Mom likely won't be able to be silent while a baby exits her body, so the birthing room will be full of sounds.
Where things can get a bit embarrassing is when the sounds are a tad strange. Some women scream loud enough for people in other rooms to hear them, while others make animal sounds or other strange noises. Mom likely won't know she is doing this since she'll be in pain, but labor sounds can get pretty weird.
Even more embarrassing is the woman whose labor sounds mimic her bedroom intimacy sounds. The groans and grunts may sound strangely close to those only meant to be heard by a lover, and though it's not something mom can help, it's embarrassing anyway.
Hospitals may require mom to labor wearing a paper thin hospital gown that makes cracking sounds every time mom moves. Other hospitals give mom the option of laboring in her own clothes. Either way some women find that the most comfortable way for them to labor is nude.
Being nude during labor is fine, especially since the doctors and nurses are going to see every part by the time it's over with anyway. However, previously modest women may be surprised to find they go full nude when in labor. The work of labor can make any clothes feel too hot, and some women just get annoyed with anything on their skin.
In the moment, nude birthing seems fine because it's what makes mom feel best. It's usually in hindsight that mom feels embarrassed that a room full of people she didn't know that well saw all of her private parts.
Potty mouths make themselves known during labor, and even women who previously didn't utter a single cuss word may release a string of profanity while in labor. The pain is intense and mom is the only one feeling it. Sometimes that's reason enough to drop the F-bomb.
Women do cuss during labor, and though some cuss at people, like their partners for not sufficiently feeling their pain, others just cuss because they are in pain and it's not aimed at anyone in particular. Still, when mom is finally holding her baby and she feels the calm love of being a mom cover her, it can be humiliating to remember that a roomful of people just listened to her curse for hours at a time.
Profanity during labor isn't new, and mom shouldn't be surprised if it happens. Doctors and nurses will likely forget, unless mom cussed them out for a specific reason, since they hear this kind of stuff often.
Birth is supposed to be a time where mom calls the shots, including who will and won't be in the birthing room. Some women want their partners, moms, and other family members around while they are giving birth. Others only want their partner and the doula. Whatever mom wants, it should be honored.
The problem is some family members are pushy. They want to be around for every second of mom's labor, including the cervical checks and the pushing stage. Most women absolutely do not want their in-laws to see them squatting and screaming while trying to move a baby down the birth canal, but some are too shy or non-confrontational to tell them to leave the room.
Having people mom doesn't want in the birthing room is embarrassing, and it's unnecessary. Mom can tell nurses who she wants in the room and who she doesn't, and they can man the door to make sure no one unwanted slips in.
7Water Breaking At The Wrong Time
The big scene in every movie where mom gives birth is the water breaking scene. Based on the movies alone women assume the water breaking is the first sign of labor. However, many women are in labor and at the hospital fighting through contractions before their water breaks.
That means the water will break in the hospital, and mom doesn't always know when. Unless the doctor breaks the water when mom comes in, she won't know at what time it's finally going to happen, and that can be a problem.
The water can break on someone's foot or during an exam on someone's hand. A partner or doula who is helping out may lose a pair of shoes due to a deluge of amniotic fluid, or mom's water may break during a contraction and splash all over the floor. Mom doesn't have to apologize since she's the one having the baby, and it's not her fault when this happens.
Just when mom thought the nausea and vomiting of the first trimester had passed, here comes labor. It's true that women do vomit during labor, sometimes due to pain and other times because of all the hormones surging through mom's body. Mom may also vomit from fear that causes an upset stomach.
Throwing up in front of other people is not fun and is always a bit humiliating. However, in the big scheme of things, vomiting while in labor is a pretty small issue. Mom is working hard, and those around her are not going to be inconvenienced by her getting sick. They are there to support her and clean up her messes while she focuses on getting the baby out.
Mom may be able to throw up in a bag or trash can, but if not, who cares. We do the best we can, and vomit lands where it will.
5Farting In Someone's Face
Yeah, this is a thing that can actually happen. Because mom uses those poop muscles during labor, she will also be using the farting muscles since they are one and the same. That means mom may both poop and fart on unsuspecting victims during the course of labor. It doesn't get much worse than that.
Plus, there's a distinct possibility that if mom doesn't share gas while in labor, she will while being sewn up. Since most women tear or require a slight cut during labor, stitches are needed to sew mom back together down there. Women who are calmly relaxing with their babies while doctors sew them up have been known to unintentionally let one rip right in the doctor's face. It's not a great thank you gift for the person who helped deliver the baby.
4Releasing Our Fears Verbally
For some women, the most embarrassing part of labor is everyone knowing how scared they are. Mom may have tried to play it cool throughout pregnancy, saying that labor was normal and natural and just a part of the process. While all of that is true, most women have some very specific fears when it comes to giving birth.
Those fears sometimes get blasted across the delivery room when mom is in labor. Mom may panic and start asking nurses questions about what is going to happen to her. Women who need to be transferred for C-sections sometimes panic and have to be given medication to calm them down. We all have fears, and when in pain and overwhelmed, moms may advertise them.
It's okay to acknowledge the scary, out of control parts of labor. Even if mom has a complete panic attack in front of everyone, she still needs to pat herself on the back for giving birth. It's not easy.
3Big O Birth
Orgasmic births happen, and though they are rare, they aren't impossible. Most women don't set out to have orgasmic births, though there are some people who hope to. However, it can happen while mom is giving birth and be a weird surprise at a very strange time.
Most women who have the big O during birth have unmedicated labors and report feeling like their bodies just led them through the birthing process. Because of the muscles used and the oxytocin coursing through the body, it shouldn't be so much of a surprise that orgasmic births occur, but for women who aren't trying to have one, it can be hard to handle.
Sharing such an intimate experience with a room full of medical professionals is embarrassing. Sure, a big O birth probably feels better than the regular variety, but it's humiliating for most women to know they shared that part of themselves with people besides their partner.
2Out Of Control Hair Situation
Most women don't worry about the hair down there while in labor. Since shaving the southern region is almost impossible due to the huge belly in the way, that area doesn't usually receive a lot of grooming during the third trimester.
However, there are other women who experience extreme embarrassment when they realize things down there were not looking their best during labor. Some women even get waxed before labor so doctors and nurses will only see the goods looking well groomed. Most of us don't have time for that, and we wouldn't think to do it anyway.
Out of control pubic hair is not the worst thing that can happen, no matter how embarrassed mom is about it. She can feel secure in the knowledge that the doctor won't remember what she looks like down there anyway, whether she was groomed or not.
We can't control other people's behavior, but we can still be embarrassed by it. When mom's partner, the person who is supposed to be our rock during labor, folds when things get hard and acts like a fool, mom will likely be humiliated.
Some partners think they are up to the birthing experience, but seeing a loved one in pain or being around all of the medical equipment throws them off their game. When this happens, nurses may end up having to take care of the partner who passes out or gets sick while trying to usher mom through labor. It's embarrassing and inconvenient for mom.
The good news is we can hold this over our partners forever, ensuring plenty of TLC when we get home. They can also change the gross meconium diapers while we recover from birthing without their support.
Mirror.co.uk, Nowtolove.com, Cosmopolitan.com, Livescience.com
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