Being transgender means that someone has a gender identity that differs from the gender they were born with. Maybe they were born as a female but nothing inside of them feels like they are a female. Sometimes they spend most of their life living as they were born and just feeling a little off. Sometimes kids are able to recognize their feelings earlier in life.
Transgenders often receive criticism and discrimination from other people — whether at school or in the workplace. What’s even worse, is that sometimes they even receive disapproval from members of their own family. Transgenders sometimes even get disowned from their family.
Does being transgender affect someone more when they are just a kid? Maybe being older and wiser gives a person the ability the block out the negativity or not believe all the hurtful lies that people say. Or maybe it affects a person the same regardless of their age. Either way, sometimes it just seems more sad when it’s a child who is being hurt and who is having devastating things being said to them. We don’t like to hear about kids being upset or feeling depressed. These whisper confessions from transgender kids are just that — heartbreaking.
15 It Can Be Hard
Without knowing the rest of the story about this Whisper, it’s hard to say why they had a hard time passing at college. My guess is that with everything going on in their personal life, they had a hard time concentrating on their studies. Maybe they felt really uncomfortable in high school and they were hoping to escape it all when they went to college.
I’m sure there were a ton of people at college who weren’t accepting of a transgender person. Did one of the students find out and spread rumors? Whatever the reason, I’m sure it wasn’t easy being transgender at college. It’s even possible that the professors were unkind once they found out that their student was a transgender.
14 How Will They React?
Telling anyone you know is a hard and confusing time for any transgender. But to tell your parents, the people who raised you as the person they thought you were, is definitely the most difficult.
Will they be supportive when you tell them and accept you just as you are? Or will they be disappointed and not understand? If you are someone who depends on your parents for financial support or for a roof over your head, how will you know that they won’t kick you out or cut you off?
We'd like to think that parents would accept their child however he/she is, but sadly, this just isn't always the case...
13 Adults Vs. Children
Children are so innocent. At least they all start out that way. They don’t see age, color, or gender. Recently my son has been asking questions about who is a boy and who is a girl. But before he got old enough to get curious about that, he had no idea about any of it. He didn’t see people as black and white or as a boy and a girl, he just saw them as people.
As we get older, we start to learn about the world and begin to develop our own views about a variety of things. I can imagine as a transgender that it would be hard to tell an adult, who may or may not approve of you, while a child wouldn’t care!
12 Small Town Life
I grew up in an extremely small town. I’m almost certain it was smaller than the town that this Whisper is from. Everyone in the town knew everything that happened all the time. If my parents grounded me when I was a kid, everyone would know. While there are some perks to knowing everyone in a small town, there are some definite disadvantages.
Being transgender in a small town doesn’t seem like it would be much fun at all. Another thing about small towns is that they don’t usually like change and they don’t like people or things that are different from what they know.
Awareness on these issues needs to be brought to these smaller towns. While not everyone may be accepting of transgender individuals, it's still worth talking about.
11 Someone Else's Voice
Being transgender means that you feel like you’re a different person than who you were born as. You were born as one person but you feel like someone else. Who knows what exactly this Whisper has been through, but they obviously feel disconnected from their body, and from their voice.
Whenever I listen to my voice on a voice recording or on a video, I always think that it sounds so weird, and that it doesn’t sound like me at all! It’s not the voice that I hear in my head when I talk. I’m sure that’s not quite what this Whisper is talking about but it’s the only thing I can think of to even come close to relating.
10 It's Just Not Fun
This Whisper sounds like they’ve been through a lot, although there isn’t much detail given. Who knows what they’ve had to deal with or what people have said. Maybe they are from a small town where people like to talk about everything that’s different. I can only imagine the kind of things people have said to this person.
Although it may seem easier to just stay away from people altogether, I hope this Whisper is able to find some genuine friends who they are able to talk to and confide in. Starting to just stay away from people is a slippery slope, and who knows what other feelings they will begin to feel after that.
9 Can Anyone Love Me?
Being a transgender is going to affect your love life, regardless of the situation. Being transgender is a complicated life, and there aren’t many people who are going to be willing to put themselves into that complicated situation. There are some stories about transgender partners staying with them throughout the process, even if they didn’t know they were transgender when they started dating. While that is the ultimate positive outcome, it doesn’t seem to happen to many people.
Transgender or not, almost everyone in the world needs and wants love. They just want to be able to love someone and more importantly, they want someone out there to love them back.
8 Make A Wish
Someone usually says that they don’t wish a certain thing on anyone when it’s awful. Maybe they went through a horrific experience like losing a loved one or something else that’s equally bad. When a person goes through something like that they usually say, “I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.”
For this Whisper to say that being transgender is something they wouldn’t wish on anyone, it means it’s definitely not something they enjoy. It actually means that being transgender has been an awes experience. Being transgender usually comes with some negative aspects but who know what this person has been through. Maybe their parents were disapproving or maybe they had friends who didn’t approve. Whatever it was, it was obviously a very bad experience.
7 It's So Hard
I can’t help but wonder if this Whisper grew up attending church regularly or when they grew up, they began going to church. Maybe their parents went to church so they went to church with their family. Either way, if they were in the church for any amount of time, they probably knew what the Catholic church believed about transgenders. Did they know that it would be hard being transgender and being in the catholic church or did they think that it would be okay?
Regardless of the specifics, I’m sure it was difficult for this Whisper to try and be active in the catholic church and not be treated right. If this person were going to church as a child, then suddenly shunned from the community because of his/her situation, it just makes rejection so much worse...
6 You Can Feel Isolated
Everyone has the need to be accepted at one point in their lives or another. Sometimes people find that acceptance in school friends. Sometimes people find that in their church community. Often times, people will find that acceptance in a group of like minded people who share similar beliefs. But what happens when you don’t have any of those? How is someone supposed to feel when they become isolated from all the communities they thought they were apart of?
Feeling like you don’t belong is not a great feeling, and it’s sad that anyone has to feel that at all. While it's slightly more understandable that the Christian community would be quick to shut their doors on difference, the LGBT community is known for promoting acceptance of difference. So we're left wondering why this whisper is isolated from the LGBT community as well?
We hope that, one day they will find a community where they belong.
5 Was It A Mistake
The feeling of doubt is something everyone has felt in their lives. You can get a great business idea and are so excited to get started, and then doubt starts creeping into your mind. I can’t do this. It was a bad idea in the first place. Why did I think I could do this?
That is probably a little bit of what this Whisper was feeling. After coming out, they probably received a lot of negative feedback and maybe lost some friends along the way. Maybe their family doesn’t support this decision. Regardless of what the situation was, I’m sure we all know the feeling and can sympathize with this Whisper.
The kind of anxiety someone lives with when in constant self doubt can be crippling - no one should have to endure it for just being themselves.
4 PTSD Can Be Real
PTSD is post traumatic stress disorder and it can happen in a variety of different situation for several reasons. It occurs after a person is exposed to a traumatic event or situation. Normally people report getting post traumatic stress disorder after some kind of sexual assault or being involved in a violent accident. A lot of men and women who were in the military often report having PTSD because of everything they have gone through.
Maybe it’s just me, but comparing a transgender to someone who has been sexually assaulted or to men and women who have fought for their country seems a little dramatic. I’m sure not everyone agreed with their decision, but enough to get PTSD? Although it’s possible this Whisper has gone through something traumatic that deems the title of PTSD.
3 It Takes More Than Time
I once answered the phone and was talking to what I thought was a man, so I referred to him as sir. They didn’t say anything so I continued to use male pronouns. After the call was over, someone told me that they were actually transitioning to a female. I felt bad, but they later told me that it was fine and it happens sometimes.
But for your best friend who has known you for 3 years after you came out, they probably know the pronouns that you prefer. Either they just don’t care about your feelings or they are really just that forgetful.
Regardless, you would think that a best friend, someone who's supposed to care about you, would make the effort to remember...
2 So Much Regret
The people in your family are supposed to be the ones that regardless of everything going on, you can count on them. If you get in a fight with your girlfriend or boyfriend, you can go home and your family can comfort you. If something happens with your friends, you can go to your family and they can help you shake it off.
To not have that comfortable place to go can be unsettling and hard to handle. Where can you go to truly be yourself? Who do you confide in when you need to get something off your chest? It would also be awful to know that no one in your family can be themselves around you either.
1 They Never Had One
Regardless of your feelings about transgenders, no one wants to see someone being disowned by their family. Kids need their family and they need to feel like they are loved by their family. I can’t even imagine how it feels to be disowned by my sibling. To have them tell me that they are doing something because they love me, even when it doesn’t feel like that to me.
From the sister’s perspective, I can imagine that it would be hard to feel like you are losing a sister too. Not sure if it makes it okay to disown your sister, but both sides have their difficulties. Besides, while she may be "losing a sister," she will be gaining a brother. Isn't that worth anything?