Wouldn’t it be nice if we could shield our children from all of the things in this world that we don’t want them to see that would hurt them?
Unfortunately, we know this isn’t possible. We also know that what we can do is try our best to keep them safe and unexposed to life’s demons for as long as we are able. We can also be there for them when they do experience the unknown and help them to navigate through these tough times.
First and foremost, we need to act as we want them to act. Do as we want them to do because ethics and values start in the home. How confusing it must be for a child to witness a parent cheating. How heavy a burden it must be for a child to have to carry this secret with them or worse yet, choose whether or not they are going to keep it a secret.
These situations are rough because we know that the truth, just as all of our actions, will have a life changing impact. Our children should never be put in a situation where they need to carry this type of burden yet it happens every day.
Parents make choices to be unfaithful and their children find out. What happens next?
15 How Much Does Secrecy Cost?
Wow! Only $250 per month to keep his mouth shout?
I would have taken the money and told her anyway too. Once this kid bought 2 new pairs of sneakers and took his girlfriend out to the Olive Garden, he must have realized that he got the short end of the stick.
Most of our mother’s put their heart and soul into raising us. So, after some time to shop and contemplate it only makes sense that he realized that he was not being the best son he could be.
All joking aside, the sad reality is that this kid is being taught 3 horrible lessons from the man he is supposed to look up to. Infidelity, bribery, and the impression that being deceitful is okay as long as it’s kept in the family. Family loyalty is important but doing what is right is admirable in anyone, especially a child. Sounds like his Mama raised him right.
14 Protecting Mom's Heart
Sounds like this son really wants to protect his mother.
It seems as though his father would catch onto this hacking sooner or later. Usually when a chick is dumped there is some back and forth discussion about it. I’m sure this Dad would notice when his mistress disappears without a trace and would ask for an explanation.
But, I will give you an A for effort kid. Sounds like he’s trying to keep the peace which is admirable. It’s hard enough being an adult and having to deal with a loved one’s affair, imagine being the impressionable child carrying this burden and confusion. What ever happened to honoring our vows people?
13 When Dad Blames His Daughter
Twisted, twisted, daddy. How a father could do this to his own daughter is incomprehensible by me. However, I was raised with a rock solid foundation of morals and I’m not a sociopath.
For most of us, we put our children’s needs above our own. For this Dad he got a piece on the side then blamed his daughter. I suppose, in the future, he won’t be walking her down the aisle at her wedding and dancing the father daughter dance to Heartland’s song, “I loved her First.” As parents we are role models.
Hopefully this 12-year-old girl found another man to look up too and was not sent by her mother to confess her alleged sexual debauchery, through the holy sacrament of Reconciliation, to her priest. Talk about having Daddy issues.
12 Mom Gets A Taste Of Her Own Medicine
Ouch! Keyed her car and flattened her tires! Sounds like this kid took Carrie Underwood’s song, “Before He Cheats,” to heart.
I often wondered after I watched that video what happened next? Did she get away with it or did she get a visit from the police? Also, did her loss of self-control really pop into the cheaters mind in the future while he was getting a lap dance at his buddy’s bachelorette party?
I’m not one to condone destruction of property but I guess it’s better than taking that aggression out on the mom herself. Ultimately, I’m sure the kid will be traumatized for life after finding out that his dear old mom couldn’t keep her legs shut. As for piecing back together their relationship maybe some counseling or a good heart to heart would do the trick.
11 Time Doesn't Heal All Wounds
The biggest message here is that this child feels to broken to love and to be loved.
They say that time heals all wounds but does it really? I’m not saying that this child will carry this weight with her forever but catching our dad cheating has to be heartbreaking and yeah I can see how it would affect someone’s future love life.
Now let’s throw the Aunt in the mix. What possibly could her sister have done to her that could make her stoop so low.
It’s sad that two people’s selfish betrayal could tear a family apart. This really goes to show us all that cheating not only affects the one’s involved but their family as well.
10 Misplaced Anger
When I was in massage school my ethics teacher had what she called a “karma stick.” It was basically a paddle with the word karma written on it.
The lesson that accompanied the karma stick was that if you act unethically you will be spanked by the karma stick of life. She taught us not to do anything behind closed doors that we wouldn’t be comfortable with the entire world knowing.
While our actions have a direct impact on us they also directly affect our children. We don’t know the long lasting impact that our infidelity could have on our children but in this woman’s case she may or may not be a psychopath thanks to her dad’s cheating.
Hopefully she doesn’t carry out her thoughts of violence towards married men. Only time will tell.
9 Mr. Two Face
There is only one thing to do in this situation. Turn to the almighty Jesus Christ. Although this father is a hardcore Christian that doesn’t mean that he is a saint. Many Christian’s believe that they can be absolved of their sins by confessing them and repenting for them.
This confession and repentance doesn’t need to be to the wife. It needs to be to God. So, this man could be cheating and lying but if he is hardcore about his faith he knows that he can count on the big guy to forgive him.
Whatever faith someone chooses, this is a hard burden for children to bare and especially for children who are taught to honor their father and their mother. Best bet for these children, pray on it and God will show you the way.
8 Insecurity Is A Killer
How horrendous this must be for this young impressionable girl. There is already that slight insecurity that many women feel when our men get multiple texts that he doesn’t comment on.
Now, add her father’s cheating to the mix. What a recipe for insecurity. Our children are watching us. They are watching our every move and we are their teachers. This girl’s father has taught her through example that men aren’t to be trusted, the sanctity of marriage is a joke, and that women don’t deserve to be told the truth.
Hopefully, one day she will find a man who can help her forget her insecurities. Many women sneak a peek at their man’s cell phone to see what he’s been up to from time to time.
Hey, the snooping may even unveil some interesting facts about our partner that helps us to understand them more.
7 Once A Cheater...
This reminds me of that old saying, “what goes around comes around.”
Some people also say once a cheater always a cheater. I don’t necessarily believe this but in many cases it is true that people don’t have that moral compass that stops them from engaging in hedonistic behavior first and thinking about the consequences later.
Our little ones, however, are watching mom and dad's every move and learning how to cope with life through their parents. They see their successes and their failures. But, they also see our strengths and our weaknesses. They see us when we are at our best and also at our worst and they learn from it all. Parents need to keep this in mind when they bring their love life font and centre.
6 Her Father's Secret
Ahh life, there are so many choices to make and each and every decision impacts our futures and the futures of others.
This child was put in an unfair situation but is now left with the guilt of keeping her father’s secret. Whatever the reason was, the kid kept her father’s secret. Now that he is dead and gone if his mother were to find out she would never be able to talk to her man and find out the motivations for his actions. She would never get an apology.
There is something to be said for leaving the past in the past. If the mother has fond memories of her husband, then no need to burst her bubble now. It’s sad that this child is carrying this secret with her but most of us have skeletons in our closet.
5 It's Never The Cheater's Fault
This dad is a pure douche bag.
Thank goodness this child had the truth to tell her mother, but damn that Dad for putting a child in that situation. As adults it is our responsibility to be held accountable for our actions.
When I am running late in the morning it would be so simple to blame it on the fact that my 6-year-old spent the morning rummaging through her brand new Spring wardrobe, did 5 outfit changes, and still decided she had nothing to wear.
Although my daughter took longer than expected to get ready it is still my responsibility to get her to school on time. I’m not a fan of blaming or shaming anyone. I hope that somewhere along the line this girl comes to a realization that she is responsible for one person’s action’s in this world and they are her own.
4 Living In Denial
No one wants there family to break up. But sometimes, they just break.
If denial is this kid’s way of coping with the fact that his father cheated on his mother than that’s his choice. However, it’s not up to him to keep his parents together. And will the burden of caring this secret be worth it?
What about confronting the Dad and having a heart to heart talk about what he has been witnessing on Facebook and how it is affecting him? If the father finds out that his son knows, and his family and marriage are in jeopardy, it’s quite possible that he may change his ways, or better yet - up his security settings.
3 Turning A Blind Eye
Keep it a secret. Expose the secret. Tell your Dad that you know. Don’t tell him that you know. Tell your other family members or keep them in the dark. Seek out counseling or bottle it up inside.
No matter what choice you make, the mere knowing about the cheating will affect your life. As parent’s we have little eyes on us all of the time so maybe before we make decisions in the future we should think about how we would feel if our actions were posted on the 10:00 o’ clock news.
If the answer is that we would be embarrassed or have any other negative emotion, then you need to think twice before you act on impulses.
2 When Mom Knows All Along
Well at least this kid was loyal to his mama and let her know.
It ended up being right for him in the long run. He didn’t need to feel guilty for hiding the secret and he had the opportunity to learn the truth. Although we might not always like the truth it is somehow freeing to hear the truth.
Many partners know that their spouse is cheating and they decided they have too much to lose by getting a divorce. Many couples are in open relationships and their children may not be aware of this.
Maybe the love the mother feels for the father is more overpowering than her hurt from his disloyalty. This child doesn’t understand how his mom can ignore it and be ok with it and unless he inquires further, he never will find his answer.
1 When Dad Makes His Rounds
When we decide to enter into a monogamous relationship we are basically saying you can trust me to be faithful. You can trust me to stay devoted and to make you and our family my priority.
I recently read a classified ad where a man was looking for a writer to compose his wedding vows for him. I thought to myself, wouldn’t his wife know if he had written the vows or had someone else had compose them?
Even if he had given the writer a general idea of what he wanted to vow it seems like an inauthentic start to a marriage. It’s a lie. If we start our marriage with a lie will the lying ever end?