Sleep deprivation is something us moms know all too well. Sleep becomes a fond memory for most mothers. Sleeping in late, taking a nap, or even sleeping a good 8 hours, hell even a good 5 is out the door for a long while. Being sleep deprived can make us do some pretty funny things.
Some people being sleep deprived can really affect their memory, or make them have drastic mood swings. Which is understandable. Being sleep deprived and having a baby is a whole different game than what we are used to.
Trying to remember to feed, change diapers, and keep the baby alive all while being sleep deprived is really difficult. It also brings about some pretty funny stories us moms get to tell our friends and family.
When my daughter was a baby, I didn't have many new mom friends. It was nice to get together with the couple I had and go over stories of what we were dealing with. And sleep, or lack thereof was a pretty big topic for us. We had countless stories of goofy/silly things we had done while being overly tired from taking care of our babies. And we aren't the only ones with funny tales to tell.
15 Couch Or Toilet? Same Thing
"I got up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night and was surprised to find I felt warm and wet. Turns out I was so tired that I was peeing on the couch instead of in the toilet. I had literally pulled down my pants, sat down on the couch, and started peeing as if I were on the toilet. I just added that to the list of bodily fluids I had to clean up that night."
This woman was one tired motha' that's for sure. And the poor thing not only had to tend to her baby throughout the night, she made a pretty nasty mess herself she had to clean up. It just comes with the territory though.
14 Showtime For The UPS Guy
"I was breastfeeding my oldest in my living room wearing only a bra and sweats. There was a knock at the door so I got up to answer it with my breast still hanging out of my bra. The UPS guy was shocked and kept looking away. I didn’t even realize what I’d done until hours later."
Well, the UPS man got quite the show that day! She gave him a great story to go back to the warehouse and tell all of his work buddies! And a pretty funny story for herself to tell as well. Thankfully, she is able to laugh about it. Although, I bet their next encounter was slightly awkward. What's really hilarious is it took her hours to realize what had happened!
13 A Spaghetti Pillow
"My oldest wasn’t even two when I had my second child. That first week was a blur. One night I got up to feed the baby and heard snoring as I walked past the kitchen. Turns out I’d forgotten to take the older one out of her high chair and she’d fallen asleep, using her spaghetti as a pillow."
This could have been a lot worse. At least the older child was left with spaghetti as a pillow. Bonus factor here is if the child woke up hungry, there was food right there! This is one of many things moms will fret over and feel guilty about. The story is pretty funny and she was ok. Although it has been reported that she will only sleep on spaghetti now.
12 Makeup Wipes Are Better Than Diamonds
"I was finally putting myself to bed so I wiped off my makeup and took off my earrings. I was so sleep deprived, though, that I put the dirty makeup wipe in my jewelry box and threw away my earrings." Awe, thankfully she realized what she did and her earrings didn't get thrown out!
Adulting is hard enough and will leave a person tired, then add motherhood into the mix... Well, it is surprising that more valuables and craziness does not happen.
At least she wasn't too tired to remember to wipe her make-up off and remove the earrings. We all know that sleeping in make-up is bad. So she had some mental comprehension going on. Here's hoping she got a good nights sleep after this.
11 Too Big For Pull-Ups
"I once tried to put on a pull-up instead of underwear after showering. Then I cried when I couldn’t get it on." This is so funny and sad all at the same time. We as moms know the struggle that comes with having a baby. Being tired is one of them, and worrying about getting our bodies back. Now the combination of not being able to put your underwear on and being tired is definitely good cause for a breakdown.
Not being able to put on a pull-up should make one happy, unless that someone is literally exhausted. And we know with exhaustion a person tends to lose their sense of rationality. She just needed a good cry and lots of good sleep.
10 Who Needs Syrup When You Got... Soap?
"I’d been up two days after coming home from the hospital and realized that I hadn’t eaten, so I made frozen waffles — and poured dish soap on them instead of syrup." Nothing worse than being tired and hungry, then when it's finally time to eat the food gets ruined by some dang dish soap.
If I was this woman I would have said screw it, and just gone to bed. Then try again with the waffles and syrup in the morning. In times like this, a mom has to remind herself that she loves motherhood, and all the sleep deprivation and hunger is actually worth it. Because there are times where a mom can think she was out of her mind for having a baby.
9 Missing Baby Alert
"One night I realized my whole family was in the room with me but no one was holding the baby. Panicked, I yelled, 'Where’s the baby?!' My husband looked straight at me and said, 'Um, honey, you’re nursing her.'"
This is not good, this reminds of the people who can't find their phone while they are talking on it. If this happens to someone, get some sleep immediately!
Obviously, she was so tired and worn out she couldn't even think straight, and it was affecting her memory! At least her husband was there to point out where their baby was. It would have been really bad if she looked all over for the baby, unable to find the baby while carrying/nursing the baby!
8 When The House Keys Don't Work
"I kept trying to unlock the front door of my house by pressing the unlock button on my car key." That is actually a really good idea, especially for moms who have their hands full. A button that unlocks the front door when pressed and even opens it for you!
Unfortunately, in this case, the car key did not work at unlocking the door. The tired mom was probably frustrated, and so tired she did not understand why the dang door would no unlock!
It would really suck to be very tired and stuck outside the house. When all she wanted to do was get in and maybe even rest! Oh, the things we tired moms do! At least she is able to laugh about it...now!
7 Dogs Are Just Like Family
"I filled a sippy with milk and handed it to the dog. When he didn’t take it I got annoyed and said, ‘Well? Here you go!’ It took me a full five seconds to realize he wasn’t the 2-year-old." The puppy would probably have enjoyed the milk had it not been in a bottle. He must have been incredibly confused though.
Being tired is just a given when one becomes a mom. I have been tired for about 10.5 years now. I would like to tell people it gets better, but I still do stuff like this all the time. Perhaps us mom's will be perpetually tired forever. And we too will try to feed our dogs out of objects that are foreign to them.
6 What Does A Crying Baby Sound Like?
"When my baby woke up in the middle of the night crying I answered the door thinking it was someone ringing the doorbell." This lady was pretty tired of having thought the baby crying was a doorbell. They sound nothing alike! Unless her doorbell is made to sound like a baby cries... Which I doubt.
This shows us how annoying a babies cry can be. And that is not meant to sound mean at all. It is just sometimes the crying goes on and on and nothing will appease the baby. It is annoying like a person who rings the doorbell over and over until someone is able to answer it. Welcome to motherhood. Full of annoying loud noises and being tired forever.
5 Where Did Hubby Go?
"During my first month as a new mom, I texted my husband (who was in bed next to me) to ask him where he was." Her husband must have really gotten a kick out of this or thought the wife he once knew and loved was gone. Being replaced by a "mombie" who was slowly losing her marbles. It is pretty crazy what being sleep deprived can do to a person.
Being this sleep deprived and not knowing that there is a person sleeping in the bed, right next to you, is a lot like being drunk. This mama needed a good, long sleep it sounds like. Then maybe she would know that her husband was actually in the bed with her.
4 Caffeine Is Every Mom's Friend
"I made coffee without any coffee grinds. It wasn’t until the second sip that I realized I was just drinking hot water." Us moms know that coffee is a friend. After a night of getting woken up numerous times, or simply unable to sleep because the baby is not waking up and we feel the need to check on him; when morning comes around a good old cup of coffee is the get-up and go that we need.
It doesn't do a whole lot of good when it is just hot water and no coffee. I mean, of course, the water is good for you, but she was clearly in desperate need for some caffeine! She was so tired it took her drinking dang near the whole cup before she even realized...
3 Mix And Matching
" I had to go a whole day like this..." one woman wrote. It is one thing to go around with mismatched socks, but mismatched shoes? Come on now! That is slightly embarrassing as people are going to notice mismatched shoes much more than mismatched socks.
If I was this poor, sleep deprived mama, I would have promptly turned around and begged for someone to watch my child so I could get some sleep! I'm sure she wanted to! But that's not how life works.
At least both shoes were very cute and stylish, even though they did not go together. She got a funny story and is able to laugh at her exhausted self. So there a couple of wins from this story.
2 Mommy Had A Mental Break
"One night, after weeks and weeks of no sleep, I genuinely believed the baby was crying because my husband had taken money from him. My husband guided me back to bed and we had great fun laughing about it the next day."
Going weeks and weeks without sleep is horrible, and can really do a number on one's psyche. So it is no wonder this exhausted mommy had a mental break and thought her hubby was stealing from their son.
It is pretty hilarious though. She said she genuinely believed that. It will make a person wonder what triggers the craziness to come out in a person when they are so tired. At least her husband was forgiving of her mental breakdown.
1 Put A Plug In It
"I walked right up to my husband and put our son’s pacifier into his mouth." I wonder if she was really tired when she did this or if that was her excuse to put a cork in her husband's mouth? Lord knows we have all wanted to do that at one point or another! Just kidding, sort of.
Being a mom gives a person what is called "mom brain". Which can make a person forgetful, very tired and constantly consumed with thoughts of taking care of their baby. So it does happen that a mom will treat her spouse as a baby. Putting a pacifier in her husband's mouth is one of the funniest "mom brain" stories I have heard.