15 Of The Dumbest Questions Women Have Asked Their Gyno

There is no such thing as a stupid question. If only that were true. This list is for all the women out there afraid to ask their gyno something lest the doctor think they are an idiot. Look at this list and feel better. Have no fear. There have been worse questions asked. Worse yet, the answers were received by way of consequences and not words.

We can debate all day long about who failed these poor people and left them thirsty at the pool of knowledge. Did their parents shelter them too much? Did abstinence only education leave them clueless?  Were they themselves to blame for not using the google machine or a book? We can only speculate. Well, that and we can also take note to try to better educate our own children. As Whitney Houston sang- "I believe our children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way." Was she picturing that being quoted in an article about stupid gyno questions when she wrote that? I like to think that she was, but you are correct. It's not likely.

This is a list of the dumbest questions that doctors have answered in the obstetrics and gynecological fields.

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15 Will You See My Boyfriend/Husband As A Patient?

Lady people in the house. The gyno is a special treat just for us. Sorry, no sharing with your husband or male counterpart. They don't have the necessary parts to check out. Now there are fertility specialists that work with testing males, but they are not gynecologists. I think your doctor would be flattered that you trust them enough to want to have your whole family seen by them, but they are more specialized. Family practice physicians are more up your alley. The gynecologist has to be available for delivering babies and such. If they have to fix your significant others man cold every other month, than we are going to have trouble keeping up with the baby delivery assembly line. Let us have this one thing to ourselves. You can have them come with you if you really need to let them in on the experience, but that's where their part ends.

14 Do I Have To Take My Tampon Out Before The Pap?

Short answer is yes. Yes, you do need to remove it. If you have had a pap before you may have noticed that they have to get up there to get a swab. If you have something else up there, than there is going to be some fighting for the best real estate. Best to let them win and move on. Less discomfort and problems for all involved. You know, I'm going to cut some slack on this one. I'll admit I may not be up on what the proper protocol is here. I have always rescheduled if I found that I was going to have that problem, and it wasn't until recently that I learned it wasn't a deal breaker to have your period while getting a pap. This one gets a pass with minimal side eye and a "we are all wise now."

13 Should I Stop My Birth Control Pills Before I Try To Have A Baby?

Now, come on lady! Don't make me lose my mind with this. Of course you need to stop the birth control pills. Birth control "controls" the birth. It's right in the name so you don't forget why you are taking it. If you say to yourself "Oh I better take my birth control pill." You should think, hmm that's the pill I take at the same time every day to prevent having births -  if I want to now birth a baby, I bet that might be a hindrance to that process. We are getting somewhere with this, right? You understand how that goes? Of course you do. You aren't the one that asked, but just in case you were confused about it. Please tell me you weren't confused about it. These aren't the things to have confusions about. There are going to be so many harder things in life.

12 Should The NuvaRing Be Worn On The Wrist?

The NuvaRing is not a piece of a jewelry. If your boyfriend tries to get you one and pass it off as like an engagement ring. Do not fall for that game. It is actually a birth control device. Kudos to him for taking an equal part in preventing children when you aren't ready. But bad on imaginary him for trying to trick you into thinking it was an engagement ring. No way man. So the NuvaRing is placed inside of your vagina. See, not really jewelry at all. It releases hormones much like the birth control pill that prevent pregnancy from occurring. Though this ring may be large enough to wear as a bracelet, you should not wear it as such. It won't benefit you in that way. Also, unless it is really blinged out, it seems like a missed accessorizing opportunity for something that could add some pop to that outfit.

11 Is It Normal To Bleed Once A Month?

You are a woman. It's time I tell you about how you are going to spread your wings and fly off into womanhood. By wings, I mean pantyliner wings, and by fly I mean fly into a hormonal rage when someone eats the last piece of cheesecake that you have been thinking about all day at work. It is in fact normal to bleed monthly. This means that you are experiencing your menstrual cycle. This is necessary to produce children. There are things that can occur with your cycle that are not "normal." For example if you bleed very heavy, if you bleed more than once in a month, if you have heavy cramping and pain. Those are all relevant things to ask your doctor about. The bleeding in and of itself is a normal part of womanhood. Welcome to the sisterhood.

10 What Causes Pregnancy Again?

Sexual intercourse causes pregnancy. When we were younger I know we all thought that being in a hot tub with a man could easily get us pregnant. Like they say though, when you were a child you thought as a child and when you were a woman you tossed aside childish things. One of those things to toss aside is the thought that you will get pregnant by touching something that touched something that once had ejaculate come in contact with it.

Yes, there are weird extenuating circumstances that can occur to get a person pregnant. However that is a much smaller chance than what we thought when we first started down this road of sexual exploration. It's a lot like, well it's a lot like how we thought quick sand was going to be around every corner when we were a kid. You probably had a plan in your head about how that would be dealt with when it happened. You haven't needed that plan have you?

9 Is There A Pill So I Can Have A Baby Boy?

No there is not. I mean maybe in the future this could be possible? Who can really say. Do me a favor. If this does end up being a thing, come back and comment on this article to let me know I was wrong. Then find me in future times and make sure that I understand that I was wrong. I will not believe you because up until that point I have not likely been wrong (if the streak holds.) You know what? It's probably not that serious. Any ways there isn't currently a boy pill. If you are looking for a way to sway the sex of the baby you can research that. I believe that it's thought that "boy" sperm are less hardy than the female ones, so if you want to get pregnant with a boy you should try to have sex closer to when you ovulate. That way the boys can make it there in time.

8 Is This Too Hairy?

It's really all a matter of opinion isn't it? Who is the doctor to tell you yes or no to that. If you are happy than everyone is happy. There are ways to get rid of hair if you find that you are unhappy with the amount or length of your nipple hair. I don't think and probably neither does your doctor that you should base your nipple hair grooming based on their proclivities. It leads to you asking a lot of personal questions.

Now to get to the point of the question. Many women do develop hair on or around their nipples. It's not something that a lot of women talk about, but it seems from a simple Google search that more are discussing it. You can certainly look into electrolysis or waxing if the sight is unnerving to you. Also, if you are concerned that the hair could be a signal of additional health problems do bring it up to the doctor. You don't however need to ask if you have too much. Only you know the answer.

7 Do You Have Anything To Make My Hair Shinier And My Nails Longer?

Ladies how long have you known about this party? I mean really. The answer here is that sure, prenatal vitamins are going to give you luscious hair and nails. If you are pregnant you will likely have the benefits of fuller hair and nail growth. However this is not going to happen overnight. It's going to be over time. Who do you think you are asking for your doctor to do magic. That's craziness. You get yourself to the drugstore and buy Lee Press-on Nails like the rest of us girls have to do. Hit up the salon for a blow out and you are ready to hit that party with the best of them. Stop by the mall to get yourself a new outfit too though. Don't want the effort on the nails and hair to be overshadowed by a drab choice in clothing.

6 Do I Only Take The Birth Control On The Days We Have Intercourse?

You need to take that pill every day of your life. You know how that pack of pills has days of the week on it? You are going to want to follow that. Take one on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, etc. I mean now that you think about it, it seems like they are trying to make it so easy, right? If you forget to take one, than you may have to take two the following day. When you miss days it can make the pill less reliable, so if you do that often - get a second form of birth control. You also may want to note that the time you take it is best left to the same time every day. So pick a time that you can stick to in order to make it more reliable. Your doctor should really have explained all this prior to prescribing. Heck they still give me all this information and I'm aged to perfection.

5 How Many Times Can The Condom Be Reused?

Oh, honey. That is not an option. Condoms are a single use item. It's kind of like toilet paper. You don't want to go and wash that off and reuse it. We all appreciate the dedication you apparently have to the environment... or to being cheap. Whichever, but it's not worth the infection or the possibly pregnancy. You will have to find another way to get yourself some extra cash. That way should be nothing related to having babies. Due caution is required in these instances. Also may I suggest that you start reading directions on everything you use. Just when you are sure you understand the directions, go ahead and take a look at the warning labels to see if there might be anything that you absolutely shouldn't do with the product. I'm guessing that you may be the reason that these labels are necessary.

4 The Baby Comes Out The Belly Button, Right?

Oh sweet darling. Isn't that cute? No. That is not the case. I mean I kind of get why you might think that since it kind of fills in the stomach. However the belly button is not a large opening that stretches. If the baby came out there, what would you do with all the lint you have stored there? Nope, it just doesn't happen that way. The baby is likely going to come out the same way it got in there. Now the exception to this would be c-sections. I'm not even going to blow your mind with that information at the moment because you really need to go to you doctor to discuss the basics about this. Also discuss prenatal care and maybe do some looking online. There is a book that is called "What to Expect when you are Expecting..." Of course continue to browse this site too. There are tons of helpful tips here to get you on the right track. This is all going to be ok.

3 I Can't Have A Baby If My Boyfriend Is Taking My Birth Control Pills, Right?

First, go find your boyfriend and take your pills back. You are not doing him any favors. There may be zero side effects. Or if there is estrogen in your birth control pill type  the boyfriend may start to sprout some breasts, less facial hair, and smaller testicles. After you have removed the pills from his grasp reach over, take his hand and march to a mirror. Both of you look in the mirror, so you can see yourselves and I want you to say: WTH were we thinking? Do you think that you can really handle sex if you can't handle researching who should take birth control pills? I'm leaning towards no. Now I want you two to break up. I'm sorry, we can't take this chance of you guys being together and procreating. The world and me met and decided on it while you were doing the thing in the mirror. It's final.

2 You Can Have A Baby As A Virgin, Right?

No, that's not really how this all works. Sex produces children. If you need some more thoughts on this Number 10 has some stuff about what causes pregnancy. You will notice that the information lends itself to the fact that you cannot be a virgin to get pregnant naturally. I suppose theoretically a woman could get artificially inseminated or have IVF done as a virgin.

Hey, just looked it up and there are virgin women getting this done. I'll be darned. As long as we all understand that basic biology does not work that way. This is through the marvel of science that we are able to get to this point. It's not a miracle of God. What a world we live in now. If you would have told me this even 10 years ago, I would have said you were cray-cray. That's not true, ten years ago cray-cray wasn't a thing. I would have been in disbelief though and that's sort of the same thing.

1 Which Vitamins Do I Take To Make Sure I Don't Get Any STD's?

There are no vitamins to take that will protect you from STDs. If someone tells you that their vitamins that do that, you should proceed with extreme caution. Also, you need to make sure that you are not only protecting against STDs, but protecting against pregnancy too. No amount of douching with Coca Cola or hot water is going to keep you from getting pregnant or from getting STDs. I can't even believe that I typed that sentence out. What have I done with my life guys? Has it all been in vain? Anyways, check with your doctor if you would like to add a vitamin regimen in to boost your health. Do not however for a second think that the regimen is going to protect you from diseases, sexual or otherwise.

Sources: Graceformoms.com, Buzzfeed, indy100.com, reddit.com

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