15 Private Thoughts These Dads Had During Their Wife's Pregnancy

When the announcement of a pregnancy hits, there can be a million different emotions, and thoughts that can also hit all at once. It is even worse during an unplanned pregnancy. Even women who have been trying for a while can find themselves feelings of fear.

The news of an unplanned pregnancy can be a complete shock, with a very wide range of emotions whether good or bad.

All throughout a women’s pregnancy men can have all sorts of thoughts in their heads, many of which they would rather not share with their partner. Many of these thoughts that men have while their partners are pregnant depend greatly on whether they are new dads or they have gone down this road before.

For new dads there will be more fear and doubts running through their minds while the dad who has been there before might be extremely excited, or just the opposite, “Here we go again.” Any way you look at it, you cannot be an expectant father without being flooding with different thoughts and emotions, whether good or bad.

We are sharing with you here some thoughts from some expectant fathers, if you are a man then maybe you have had some of these thoughts yourself.

Continue scrolling to keep reading

Click the button below to start this article in quick view

Start Now

15 My Boys Can Swim!

According to glamour.com Matt and Lisa were having some difficulties getting pregnant so when she finally shared the good news with him that she was finally pregnant all he could think about was,” My boys can swim.” He was obviously very excited and I can really relate to his joy because my wife and I had tried for a year with no success until she finally ended up pregnant with our son. What an awesome time.

I know it is very frustrating when you want a child of your own so badly but for some reason, it just isn’t happening, but the upside to it is all of the trying is enjoyable. Although when you try and try and it doesn’t happen it can cause some depression thinking that there is something wrong with you, I know for that year we were trying with no luck, I really thought that for some reason my pencil was out of lead, even though I already had other children, I thought it must have dried up or something. So even though it may be fun trying it can also hurt your pride if you believe that you are the problem. Of course, you can always go to the doctor to be sure.

14 Will I Be Replaced By The Baby?

This man’s fears as he shared them on cupofjo.com are very common for new dads. He was so worried that he would be replaced by his own child and when the child was actually here his wife made his fears even more real when he overheard her telling their little boy that he was the most important thing in her life, OUCH, that was a blow to his ego.

Though this man had to deal with the insecure feelings of being replaced, after some time he came to realize that the love she had for the baby was a different kind of love and that their marriage could never be replaced.

I guess you could say that he slowly began growing up and reaching the level of a mature parent.

One thing becoming a parent will do to many men is force them to grow up really fast. Grown men can so often act like kids themselves but after having a child things really begin to change for them or at least it should, I know there are still some guys out there who refuse to change even after their child comes into the world. Maybe they are unable to feel the love that other men feel towards their children, who knows.

13 She's Pregasaurus Rex

One dad on the Babycenter forum says that everything was just fine throughout his wife’s pregnancy that is until around the 8th month and at which point he actually calls her,” pregasaurus Rex.”

I sure hope for his sake she is the understanding type and didn’t take that name too seriously and bite his insensitive head off. I don’t like making fun of any pregnant woman but if his wife found it to be humorous then I guess it’s not so bad, after all, she probably has a few names she could hurl back at him.

Maybe she should call him tyrannosaurus rex for his tiny um, IQ. I would bet that if men could get pregnant they wouldn’t look half as good as women do. I realize that he and his wife are just kidding around but it just sounds so horrible.

Pregnancy is not a joke and a woman carrying a baby is very beautiful, the only thing more beautiful is the baby. I wonder if after she has the baby and he is feeling frisky if she is going to throw that name back at him. Women remember every bad thing that ever comes out of your mouth. They have the memories of elephants.

12 I Feel Useless

Giuliano O is a dad from Las Vegas and according to parents.com Giuliano could not stand the idea that with all his wife was going through, there was nothing he could do to help her except be there to support her. For a lot of men they feel that they need to be the stronger one in the relationship and be able to fix everything, but for this man, it was hard watching his wife in pain and not being able to take it from her, or at least minimize it.

Just worrying about your wife alone can put a lot of added stress in your life, and then add that to the rest of the messed up emotions you may be having and you just might be worse off then your wife.

Pregnancy can make a strong confident man suddenly feel lost and out of control, and the feeling of not having control of a situation can really be hard on a man. I don’t think women really have any idea how much is really going on inside or her hubby’s head throughout her pregnancy.

Ladies, bear with us, that little life inside of you is changing us in big ways.

11 Keep The Bedroom Door Closed

According to the BabyCenter forum, one man had explained how even though throughout his wife’s entire pregnancy he found her to be quite attractive he still had a problem with the thought of being intimate with his wife knowing that there was another life growing inside of her.

I have to admit, it is a little weird getting intimate with your wife when you know that your son or daughter is right there inside of her. This man said that he still did it with her anyways and says he hung in there like a trooper, that to me sounds like such an insult. He makes it sound like he is doing something he really doesn’t want to do. Like he is only doing it for her.

I guess this guy was just afraid of poking the kid in the eye or something. Now if something grabs a hold of you while you are in there then I think you have good reason to worry. The way I see it is that maybe you should enjoy it as much as you can because many times after the baby comes there just doesn’t seem to be time anymore for intimate relations with the wife.

10 She Looks Funny... Kinda

Via: Closer

On the BabyCenter forum, one husband says that when his wife was pregnant he was still very attracted to her intimately, but also admits that in his head he thought she also looked a bit hilarious, saying that she is a short woman and that her big belly just made her look funny.

He also said that he would giggle just looking at her.

I don’t know that giggling at your pregnant wife is a very smart move, I mean they are already dealing with crazy hormones and mixed emotions, laughing at her appearance could seriously backfire on you. Don’t ever mess with a pregnant women’s feeling.

There are two definite occasions in a woman's life when you really need to watch what comes out of your mouth, one is that time of the month and the other is during pregnancy. If you want to live a long life and have a happy marriage you might want to keep this in mind.

You have probably heard the saying,”Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned,” well I tell you, if that woman being scorned is carrying a child or is bleeding, you had better go off and hibernate somewhere and don’t come out until her head stops spinning and she stops spitting up pea soup.

9 Will She Have Time For Me?

One man on parents.com said that his biggest fear about having a child was that he was afraid that his wife would no longer have any time for him. There are times when a new dad will have to face the reality that their little baby is going to need much more attention than he does and for some men, that may be a hard thing to deal with.

You really have to accept the fact that parenting is never an easy job, it takes lots of patience, understanding, some self-sacrifice, and a whole lot of love.

I believe that the majority of men can deal with losing out on some of the attention because they are so in love with this new baby that their own needs don’t really seem to matter as much anymore. You think you know what love is before you have a child but quickly realize after becoming a parent that the love you have for your child is deeper than any love you have ever known.

Most parents are willing to sacrifice a lot for their children. Suddenly your life is no longer about you anymore, you are now living for someone else and it is a feeling that cannot compare with any other.

8 You’re Not The Only One Who’s Emotional

According to Parents.com Adam Cohen is a dad from New York City who knows that there is no way for him to ever really understand what it must be like to be pregnant, as with all men of course. But he believes that a lot of dads to be can be just as messed up emotionally as the women.

A man’s head can be filled with all kinds of doubts and worries over whether or not he will be a good dad. And even though both men and women alike are going to be learning the ins and outs of parenthood as they go, it sometimes takes men a little longer to get the hang of things.

Another worry is that some men are afraid at first to hold these little tiny babies for fear of, as some men may put it, breaking them. For mothers, their motherly instincts kick in very quickly.

There are so few things that can make a grown man cry but a baby is one of those things and that is very understandable because babies touch our hearts like nothing else can. So if you are a soon to be a dad, do not be afraid to let your emotions show.

7 A Bucket In Every Room

One man on the BabyCenter forum said that during his wife’s pregnancy she would get sick so often that they had to keep something in every room of the house for her to get sick in. So I guess this is something that has made such a huge impact on his brain that he can’t seem to forget about all the horrible images of his wife puking up every meal.

There are quite a few things that a man can get stuck in his head about the months leading up to the delivery of the baby and some of those things can be very unpleasant.

I am sure he will eventually get over those images and once again be able to get close to her without imaging her getting sick.

I know most pregnant women do experience a certain degree of nausea but as much as this man says that his wife was getting sick this may very well deter him from wanting any more children. I know it would have made me think twice. Of course, you could always adopt a child, there are so many children out there wishing for someone to adopt them. I was adopted and I will always be grateful to my adopted parents.

6 My Imagination Kept Me Giggling

One man on Parents.com named Jeremy admits that he had some really strange thoughts in his head after having some alone time with his wife and not using any baby stoppers.

While enjoying some television with his wife he just breaks out into a giggle fit and refuses to tell her what is on his mind, leaving her to think he may be losing it, while all this time he is seeing in his head those little swimmers floating all around the baby and the baby trying to swat them away. WOW!

Men have all sorts of things floating around in their brains when their partner is pregnant but I do believe that this is the strangest one I have ever heard although I have to admit, it is kind of funny. I can’t help but wonder if he will ever share it with his wife or just let her keep thinking that the man she married is a little loose upstairs.

Men do have a different sense of humor than women do so maybe he should just keep it to himself, after all, she might find him even crazier if he shares this with her. I guess some things just need to stay up in your head.

5 What Have I Gotten Myself Into?

Via: Colchester Gazette

One man on BabyCenter UK said that the big question in his mind was,”What am I getting myself into.”

He is not the only man to think like this, but his friends didn’t help the situation very much by saying things to him like, “Are you enjoying your last days,” this is something people usually say to a friend when they are about to get married.

For some men, they fear that having a child would mean the end for all of their life’s ambitions and that everything they may have hoped they would be able to do in life will no longer be possible.

This fear had subsided the more he thought about his life with his child in it, he would talk to his wife’s baby bump and he was really beginning to embrace the thought of this new life he was about to experience.

One of the changes that many of us go through after becoming a parent is that our life’s ambitions completely change and suddenly the only ambition we seem to have is giving this child the best that you can give them, and this seems to be the only thing that matters anymore. It is quite a good feeling.

4 It’s Not Real Until The Baby Is Here

This man said on supernanny.co.uk that he stayed in complete denial until the baby arrived. He didn’t want to let himself have any real feelings about the baby before he or she was born just in case something were to go wrong. There are so many things that can go wrong in a pregnancy that this is a very understandable fear.

Throughout time there have been so many excited parents to be who had all of their hopes smashed after something had gone wrong during the pregnancy or even during the delivery.

Complications happen all too often, so even though it can be a real fear you should not let it rob you of the joy that goes along with the expectations of parenthood.

All those fears of what if, can really ruin what should be a happy and exciting time in your life. None of us knows what the future has in store for us so just go on celebrating your soon to be child, talk to your baby through your wife’s belly, keep all positive thoughts don’t miss out on this time because it is too special to miss. I really miss those days of singing to my son through my wife’s belly.

3 In The Mood More Than Ever

One woman from What To Expect tells us exactly what was going on in her hubby’s mind, although it is not a secret it is still worthy of sharing because this is something more men go through than some may realize. She said that she and her husband would be intimate 4-5 times a week, sounds to me like a very young marriage, but after she got pregnant she said his desire was even stronger and that he found her very desirable throughout the entire pregnancy and they had started becoming intimate every single day.

This sounds like it could turn into one of those stories where a woman gets pregnant while already being pregnant.

All I can say is he had better enjoy every day like this because it might not continue this way after the baby is born. I could be wrong though because some people go on like this even when they have a young child to care for but it does get a little more difficult to fit it into your schedule.

It is a wonderful thing when a couple desires each other so strongly, and it is even more wonderful when they keep that close bond between them throughout the years.

2 What Did We Do?

In glamour.com a man named Rob says that when his wife Allison first told him that she was pregnant he was ecstatic, but then that feeling faded away as he started to think about the negative aspects of parenthood, and began to worry about how they would be able to afford it and the fear of being responsible for taking care of another person for years to come.

According to Rob, he actually had to have a glass of wine and medication just to calm down. I hope he got over it and didn’t let his anxiety get the best of him. Besides once she realized she was pregnant should have been the moment your whole life would change so much for the better.

Some people even though they have a very happy marriage seem to have the feeling of being complete once a child enters their lives. You are no longer just a happy couple, you are now a happy family, what a wonderful feeling.

The fact that Rob even had some medication says they he must have already had an issue with anxiety. So I hope he can handle the challenges that come along with raising a child.

1 How Did This Happen?

According to Glamour, Nick and Elisa had been in an on and off again relationship for quite some time, and then one day when she shocked him with the news that she was pregnant, his mind became flooded with all sorts of very understandable questions like, should they get married,? Would he be able to put a car seat in his M3,? Would they be able to afford it.?

All of the questions running through Nick’s mind were very good questions, all except for one, “How the He__ did this happen?”

Ok, so if you don’t know the answer to that question I think you should maybe try keeping your hands off of Elisa. If you don’t know how it happened you just might make it happen again.

Well, all joking aside Nick and Elisa got married and he says that when his daughter was born was the happiest day of his life.

I guess if you have been using some type of protection the question of how did this happen might actually be an honest thing to ask yourself. I mean everyone knows if you kiss a girl she will get pregnant, ok just a childish type joke.

References: parents.com, blogs.babycenter.com, cupofjo.com, babycentre.co.uk, supernanny.co.uk, whattoexpect.com, glamour.com

More in Incredible