Everyone in the world is stressed about something whether it is big or little. Like right now the Kardashian West Clan is currently stressing that they can't come up with a baby name that rivals Sir and Rumi. Being stressed out as a parent is kind of just apart of the gig.
But what about when being typically stressed out becomes something a little bit more? When being stressed goes beyond the regular we cross over to the world of complete and utter burn out. That’s not a bad thing because at some point we all have been there or will be there.
The important thing is recognizing it for what it is and being strong enough to raise our hands and say “I need help.”
That help can come in many forms. It could be a nice trip to the spa, or a weekend getaway with our partners (or a weekend away from our partners, depending on how burnt out we are), or seeking some relief in the form of therapy. And sometimes it can be as simple as stepping away for an hour and regaining our composure and vegging out with bad reality TV or a good book.
The important thing to remember is that it really does take a village to get through being a parent and that there is nothing wrong with asking for help.
15 You Buy More Febreeze Than Detergent (Just Turn Those Undies Inside Out!)
My laundry and I are locked in a constant power battle. Laundry knows I can't really survive without paying attention to it but my instinct is to always neglect it until it literally feels like it's chasing me down the hall. And then when I do manage to take control, it taunts me as it grows sock legs and underwear hair.
When I'm in a good spot, I'm on top of that laundry like I'm in the running for some kind of Good Housekeeping award or something. But when things are bad I'm finding myself at Target purchasing more underwear and Febreeze to buy myself some more time. If there are more Febreeze bottles in your trash can than detergent bottles, you're probably a little burnt out. Admit defeat and call in some help with the mounting laundry.
14 You Respond Only When There's Blood
I know that I need to tap-out when I no longer move unless there is blood, fire or an intruder. And honestly, once an intruder stepped inside our home and tripped over one of the 75 Imaginext play sets and slipped in yogurt, he would probably just see himself out.
Some days I am completely invested in being a SAHM. I'm all about organized activities, cute lunches, and maybe a learning sheet. By the time 4 or 5 o'clock rolls around, I need to lay down in a dark room and stare at a wall. Those days unless there is a real 911 emergency I let my kids just figure it out. When I start having those days on a regular I know that I need to get out before I become that crazed mom on the news.
13 Grey's Anatomy Makes You Wish You Were A Patient
I knew I was on the verge of a sudden but imminent collapse when I would watch Grey's Anatomy and begin to think how nice it would be to be a patient. I know, a lot of people are in for some serious stuff. I'm not looking to come down with anything deadly. Appendicitis or a migraine that would have me in bed for a few hours or days sounds really nice.
When you’re in the hospital, everyone there is dedicated to you. Instead of you asking someone every five minutes if they have to poop or pee, someone cares about your elimination output. You've got all the jello your heart could desire and people want to fluff your pillows for you. It's almost like being at 5-star hotel... almost.
12 You Call 911 Because The Kids Go Missing...
Pregnancy brain is a cute little term they give to expectant mothers. Often they may do things like put their keys in the freezer or completely forget why they have a toothbrush in their hands (guilty). And to some extent, that never really goes away after you have a baby. There is the regular everyday forgetfulness that we all experience in the day to day grind that is motherhood and life in general.
But if you are finding yourself continuously forgetting to pick your kids up from school, completely blanking on packing lunches, forgetting to change the baby's diaper or not being able to find your husband's missing keys or wallet, this is your brain trying to signal to you that your goose is cooked. It's time to take a break, mama.
11 The Swear Jar Is Funding The Family Vacation
A swear jar is cute little incentives that some families have implemented to curb the long stream of F bombs and other colorful language that may echo in their households.
Most often everyone over the age of like 11 probably has to throw in a dollar every now and again. It happens. And honestly, sometimes the only way to describe that person who cut you off is by calling them a name that would make your grandma blush.
But if you are planning a family vacation to the Atlantis Bahamas resort (which is very expensive by the way) strictly from your own personal contribution to the swear jar, it may be time to step away for a minute or twenty-two. Take a few deep breaths and maybe pull out the dictionary to find some alternative language choices you can start to use.
10 Your FB Statuses Get More Sad Faces Than Happy Ones
We are all guilty of using social media to vent about the state of our life. Some of us tend to do it a lot more than we should. It's nice sometimes when you're on Instagram or Facebook and you get a real glimpse into the life of a parent. It's a good reminder that not everyone has spot free white couches.
If you are out with your friends and they start telling you how funny your updates and photos are, pat yourself on your back. But if you're unemployed, still living in the basement of his mother's house, talking to people on XBox Live and your brother tells you that reading your updates makes him grateful for his own situation, it's time to delete social media and maybe find a private diary to vent to.
9 The Kids Have To Remind You To Use Your 'Inside Voice'
I don't know what it is about preschoolers and toddlers but there is something that just doesn't connect in their brains when it comes to the volume of which they speak. If you are a parent of a child under the age of five, one of your on repeat phrases is certainly, "Please use your inside voice."
But when your own children start telling you to use your inside voice you know that it is high time. So find yourself a corner and have a self-imposed timeout (a glass of wine is allowed). If your neighbors know that your child likes to pull all the cushions off the couch and then refuse to clean them up every single day you probably need a break.
8 It's The First Week Of School And The Kid Was Late 5 Times
With any luck, you are reading this from a cozy chair in your living room listening to the sounds of absolutely nothing because school is finally back in session in most states. A bittersweet moment for some if you have a younger child entering the school force (you know like work force? Get it? Ahh, forget it!) for the first time, but still a very welcomed break.
But you know that this is going to be a very long school year if you are only a week or three into it and already you've had to send in three "my child was tardy because..." notes. Look, I get it. We've already overslept once and I've had to send them to the cafeteria for lunch because I "forgot" to pack lunch. But use your free hours wisely now. We've only just begun.
7 Wine Of The Month Club Becomes A Weekly Thing
Some of you super fancy moms out there probably have a wine of the month membership. I'm not much of a drinker, but with four kids (one who was caught literally swimming through spilled milk yesterday), I probably should be.
If you find yourself continuously issuing BYOB play date invitations to the moms of your child's friends or if you are supplementing your monthly wine shipments with numerous trips to the liquor store, you probably have a problem.
Sure parenting is hard like basically all.the.time but if the only way you are making it through your day is by popping bottles, you need to take a step back, re-evaluate, cancel the monthly subscription to Wino-of-The-Month and find a local AA meeting.
6 You Can Never Figure Out What Day It Is
Another sure fire way to test the burnt out barometer on your mom-o-meter is to check how well you are sleeping. If when you are waking up it takes you a good five minutes to work out where you are and what day it is, you've officially reached the end of your rope. If when you wake up you immediately start counting down to the second when you can climb back into bed, you probably need something stronger than a steaming hot cup of Joe.
If sneaking away for a weekend (or God bless you, an entire week) isn't something that would work for you, take an afternoon and leave the laundry be, tune the channel to Nick Jr. and fall asleep. Guilt free and with no judgment.
5 Applied At McDonald's "Just Because"
The biggest debate that we are currently facing right now is who has it better: the stay-at-home mom or the working mother. Some tell you that staying home can be the most rewarding thing you ever do with your life. You build forts, make play-doh cakes and bake cookies. Sure it's fun and at times can be very rewarding.
But if you start thinking that getting a job at McDonald's part time or as a dog walker just to be able to escape your house with more consistency, then the reward tank is officially empty. And if you are a working mother who is always the one volunteering for overtime or to take on an extra project just to not deal with the screaming banshees that await you...you need to call in sick...everywhere.
4 Coffee No Longer Does It For You
I don't drink coffee. So I'm writing this next entry kind of blind here. But from what I gather from the many coffee addicts related merchandise and memes that are out there, some of you really really need your coffee.
Coffee is (apparently) like a little magic elf that kind of just puts everything into focus for you. It has an ability to right the wrong of the day and moves ten thousand dirty dishes into the dishwasher. Right? Again. Totally guessing here, but if you all are willing to decorate your person with coffee related wear it must be pretty good.
If your normal cup or gallon of coffee is suddenly not able to refill your coffers you, ma'am, may need to look into taking a long romantic vacation with your blend of choice.
3 Offers To Organize The Parent Closet As A Way To Escape
Most schools have a room on campus that they call "the parent center" where parents meet for meetings, staple flyers, and store decorations and tchotchkes from past events. The problem with this room is it's kind of like the junk drawer for an entire school. People tend to just push stuff in there they don't know where else to put and then you get spider webs and maybe even some creepy crawlers.
Keeping it organized is a labor intensive job that no one likes to do. But if you keep raising your hand to take on this less than fun job just to be able to escape your kids (or husband) for a few hours, then it's a sure sign you need a real break. Put down the decorations from your school's 2012 Thanksgiving play and head to the spa, stat.
2 Every Little Thing Is The End Of The World
In my household, I am the fix-it person. Not for toilets and tires and stuff. But I'm definitely the one that has to call and scream at the cable company when the wi-fi is slow or figure out how to make it to three different activities all at the same time. Usually, I take this job on with the gusto of 1,000 men. I thrive on the challenge and do my best work under the insta-pot pressure cooker.
But catch me on a wrong day and a simple request like what time we need to leave the house for an event or helping pick out a shirt for a meeting can make my head explode. It makes me feel like if I were to leave this entire house would crumble like Taylor Swift's reputation.
1 You Think Everyone Else Has It Together
Perhaps the number one reason that you know you've burned your candle at both ends is when you start looking at everyone else and thinking that they have all of their 'ish together.
And no, I don't just mean the perfectly coiffed mom at school or your neighbor who is always out doing fun activities with her kids. I mean you start looking at the bad moms like Teen Mom Jennelle Evans or Octo-Mom or heck, even any Kardashian mother, and think to yourself that they should really write a parenting book because clearly they have it all figured out.
The truth is those moms obviously don't have it together and even those moms that seem like they do are often just at the edge too. You are not alone!