There is not one single family on this planet that is perfect, no matter how hard they try to present themselves to the entire world that they are. Every family has their dirty little secrets whether we realize it or not. Some people are just better at hiding things than others. This is part of the reason that, sometimes, families will seek out therapy together. It doesn't matter if it's their last resort or their first try. This is where family therapists enter into the equation.
Just like the rest of the world, most family therapists feel the need to vent and confess things too. Thanks to the anonymous social media app Whisper, they can do just that. Some therapists confess they feel that after dealing with dysfunctional or troubled families all day, they need to see their own therapist more often. Others offer wise advice to other families in need, and a few have some wild secrets about their own patients - without mentioning names of course.
Have you ever wondered what goes through the mind of a family therapist, or any therapist in general? I know I have! Here's your opportunity to see into their minds with the following Whispers below! Continue reading to see what these 15 family therapists honestly confessed to!
15 Therapists Go To Therapy Too
This Therapist confessed that dealing with dysfunctional families all day makes him/her need to see their own therapist more often. Then s/he admits that, yes, therapists need therapy too. That is a little-known fact about being a therapist - sometimes they need therapy just like the rest of us. It has to be hard listening to other people’s problems and issues all day. They must actively listen to what their patients are saying during every single session.
I sometimes wonder how therapists even stay awake half the time. Plus, there are always the resilient patients that need the most help, and they just don’t seem to want to listen to their therapist's advice anyway. That must drive certain therapist nuts at times. I am sure they also have their own personal issues that they have to deal with as well. After all, they are just regular human beings like you and me.
14 Breaking Confidence
This therapist confessed that just because she is someone’s family therapist, which they do have a rule they have to follow regarding confidentiality, this does not mean that if it is life-threatening that she will keep it to herself. I am sure that therapists have to speak up if something really bad is going on. They do have a code of ethics to follow.
It makes you wonder a bit about what makes or made her break that confidentiality rule. If it involves endangering a child, I am sure that is most likely one of the times when the silence has to be broken. It also makes you wonder if she tells her patients, or at least some patients, that she has to report what has been said to her.
13 Advice To Families
This family therapist had some good advice for families all over. She confessed that they have to learn how to actively listen to one another, most likely without any judgment, and to communicate in a healthy way. She admitted that unless families can learn to do that, nothing will be able to help them.
In a way, I really do believe that because there are so many people out there that feel like they cannot talk to or communicate with their family because there is always that one person, or more, who is quick to judge or they automatically tell you how wrong they think you are without listening to a word you have to say. When someone acts like that it really makes things worse than they have to, or should be.
12 Send Them To Boot Camp!
This family therapist may have a good point when it comes to troubled children and teens. S/he asked how s/he is supposed to help out of control teenagers when s/he is nothing more than a mere family therapist. S/he said that it is not like the teens will listen to what they have to say anyway. That is definitely the truth! It feels like kids now, compared to when I was in high school a few years back, are much wilder than ever before.
His/her advice: send their butts to boot camp! If doing so would be within the family budget, I would say go for it! Some teenagers need more help than others, and only their parents will fully be able to make that decision. Most likely, the kids will despise their parents for a very long time. But once they get older, and see it was for the best, they will eventually get over it. I would really only use boot camp as a last resort, however. Personally, I would avoid boarding school because some teens actually have more freedom there, than at home.
11 Therapists Have Secrets Too
Hearing a family therapist admit that they secretly root for some families to break apart as their own did, is pretty disturbing. They should be rooting for all families to make it out of their difficult situation stronger than ever. I wouldn’t want a therapist who thought like that, that’s for sure! It would make it seem like they wouldn’t be doing everything they could to help families stay together, let alone be giving them good advice.
I am sure they would make it look like they are on their side and that they are doing their job to the best of their abilities when they really have an ulterior motive. This therapist really needs to find a new job! I feel horrible for the families that this person treats! They really should know the truth so they can look for someone who may actually want to help them!
10 “Beyond What I Can Offer”
This probably sounds a little discouraging to some people. A lot of families seem to think that going to see a family therapist will be a cure-all and that their family will no longer have any more issues or complications amongst themselves any longer. This is not always the case. Therapists will give families the tools they need to try to work things out, and it is up to them whether or not they are willing to utilize those tools.
This therapist said he or she thinks it’s great that families want to try to work things out but many of them are beyond what s/he can offer them. At least this therapist seems sincere about wanting families to make it, and that she is not rooting for anyone to fail. Unfortunately, for the families that are beyond his or her help, I am not sure what is left for them to try. They just have to try to work together, and like one of the other therapists said; try to listen and communicate with one another in a healthy way!
9 When They Can’t Help
This family therapist confessed that there are just some people they are unable to help, and when that happens, it tends to sting a bit. This can be completely understandable because when you are working with someone or trying to help someone out with all you have to offer, and no matter how hard you try your efforts turn out to be useless; it is bound to have some kind of an impact on you.
Most therapists choose the field they're in because they want to be able to help people. There aren't too many therapists, I hope, who chose that field and had ulterior motives. I'm sure some therapists, at some point in their careers, who are used to not being able to help everyone who walks through their door don't let it bother them anymore. Others may just be a tad bit more sensitive, which may cause them to feel worse than others.
8 The Impossible Happened
What this therapist confessed to on Whisper is absolutely insane! It's hard to believe that what this person said is even true. S/he said that the impossible happened, and admitted that s/he is seeing a patient and his family for therapy and that as it turns out, he has not one, but two families!
This therapist said that this patient wants him/her to see BOTH of his families! I don’t even think there is a word for how idiotic this patient is. I know the therapist legally cannot tell either wife, but it is still crazy. What if wife number one shows up to talk to their family therapist one on one, while her not so faithful husband is there with wife number two? Has this guy even thought about that before trying to have both his families see the same family therapist? Yikes! This is one major mess! I wonder what this therapist's first reaction was?
7 Hashing It Out In Front Of The Kids
This therapist asked why parents feel the need to hash out their intimate details in front of their kids during their family therapy sessions. This Whisper user confessed that even though she is a therapist, she finds it disgusting. I would have to agree with her 100 percent. No matter how old children are, they don’t want to hear or know about their parent's intimate details. Plus, if they are too young, they really shouldn’t be hearing about it in the first place.
When my one Goddaughter was only four, she came to me and said that she knew what the “s” word means. You know what “s” word she was talking about! It was disturbing to hear someone that young describe it. Her mom should have been ashamed of herself. Her father was equally disgusted.
6 They Need To Talk About Their Day Too
This Whisper user confessed that she vents to her husband after work because she needs to talk about her day too. She admitted that she is also a family therapist. In my opinion, as long as she is not giving her husband details about her patient's identities, it should be just fine. It’s her husband, after all. We all need to vent after a long workday.
However, her husband has to be responsible for the information she entrusts in him. He should not go hang out with his friends and blurt out, “You’ll never guess what my wife told me about her one patient!”
As bad as it sounds, confidentiality is broken all the time. Have you ever gone to the hospital and heard a nurse outside your room talking about your case in the middle of the hall and within another patient's range of hearing? I know I have.
5 Broken Homes
This Whisper user confessed that it is sad, and understandably true, that treating families from broken homes which are caused by the parents own infidelities harms that couples children the most. From how this Whisper is worded, it makes it appear that this woman is a family therapist of some sort. Parents mess up, that is understandable. They are only human. Plus, relationships can sometimes sour, especially when people cheat. Children should not bear witness to any of this.
The parents may be hurting, especially the faithful parent, but have they ever stopped to think about what they are doing to the children when things like this happen? A majority of the time, parents can act selfish and think about how they feel and put their emotions and actions before even considering the children’s feelings. That right there, is what make broken homes even sadder.
4 They Should Go To Couples Therapy
This Whisper user brings up another very good point when it comes to children and their parents in therapy together. This family therapist said that if a couple is having marital issues should not bring their children into the mix. Children are like sponges and absorb everything they see and hear. I mean that’s how children learn, right? By what they hear and what they are exposed to.
Every marriage goes through trial and error; not every marriage is perfect. What most parents don't realize is how it affects the child. Although, your children may affect your relationship, however, they should never be brought into any of the confrontations. Not only are children like sponges, but the counseling may also affect their emotional well being. That could actually do more harm to the child. Sometimes the saying. “It’s better left unsaid.” is true, especially in this case.
3 Writing Their Next Best Seller
This family therapist confessed he’s an extremely well multitasker! Trying to listen to each family member, and writing his next big novel is one huge task. However, it is not very acceptable, and if anyone ever found this out, this man could get in a heaping pile of trouble. Therapists are there to listen to their patients and help them out; not to become a New York Times bestselling author!
I think he has his priorities mixed up. It’s great that he already has a novel out, according to this Whisper, but he should be doing that on his own time and not when he is supposed to be doing his job. This could potentially be just as bad as pulling out your cell phone at work and taking a call when you're in the middle of helping someone out.
2 When They Don’t Give It Their All
This family therapist admitted therapy wouldn’t work unless everyone gives it their all. Going to therapy is to help build each other up, and to make their relationship stronger. This can only happen if each member of the family tries to compromise with one another.
A relationship is like building blocks that are constantly stacking if one side isn’t stacked properly the whole structure will collapse. Everything has to be done equally. So, if one person is giving it their all while the others aren’t giving anything at all, things can fall apart even more.
I know it’s weird to compare your life to a children’s toy, but it’s a 100 percent true. So, therapy would be a complete waste of time if you are not making an effort, even with family therapy, the blocks will still come crumbling down unless the help is actually wanted.
1 More Advice From A Family Therapist
This family therapist advised that you shouldn’t seek therapy if you have absolutely no desire to change. Therapy is a good way to get things off your chest. It may also help you thrive to become a better person in some cases. On the other hand, some people go into therapy to change but have absolutely no desire to do so.
Having a family can be stressful. Trying to juggle work, children, a social life, and a spouse can absolutely drive anyone insane. Some people think they don’t have time to change while juggling everyday tasks. Others just have no desire and come up with every excuse in the book, But they still attended therapy. How insane is that? You go to seek the help you need, but you have no intention of learning or changing anything in your lifestyle.