When things get hot in the bedroom, that's when a baby can be conceived. However, no matter how sexy a woman finds her mate before the baby, pregnancy can change everything. No matter how good he looks or smells, there are a surprising number of turn offs that can happen when the baby is on board.
From the way he reacts when he finds out he will be a dad to his actions in the delivery room, the dad-to-be can find himself on the wrong end of his partner's affections. Some of it is hormonal, and some of it is physical. All too much of it is psychological.
While many women can feel terrible for a full nine months and can never imagine getting it on during a pregnancy, most moms-to-be want to continue to have a hot sex life. In fact, for many, the sex drive goes up during the second trimester, when the blood is in the right place to make everything feel good. But if her significant other doesn't play his cards right, that romantic spark can be blown out, and that can account for a very long nine months.
Here are 15 surprising turn offs pregnant women feel toward their significant others.
15 Bad Reaction
A pregnant woman's significant other can prove how sexy he is from the moment he learns he is going to be a parent. It all comes down to how he reacts to the news, and sometimes a person just can't properly prepare themselves to learn they will be a parent. The reaction says it all, and even if he comes around, that first instinct won't be forgotten.
Even for families who have been trying to expand for years, the news that a baby is on the way can be frightening — another mouth to feed and a bunch of bills, a host of health milestones and issues to deal with and more come with a baby. Some men meet the challenge with the positivity and support that a mom-to-be needs, while others can panic or worse.
An excited expectant father can be totally hot, but if he takes the news badly, that is definitely a turn off.
14 Aftershave After Effects
Morning sickness can make a woman miserable during her first trimester of pregnancy. Every knows that some foods can make her sick, but many are surprised to learn that smells can be even more nauseating. Unfortunately, sometimes a woman's favorite smells can become her worst nightmares during those first few months.
Many a father-to-be has learned that the hard way when he has gotten all showered and shaved, expecting a little loving only to find out about the aftershave after effects. Those strong manly scents that used to be one of his significant other's biggest turn ons can become a big turn off thanks to the smell aversion symptom, and that can make romance hard to come by.
13 Worry Weary
Men can get pretty protective when their woman is carrying a baby. With his family about to expand, he wants to do all that he can to make sure that both the mom and baby are healthy. That can be quite a turn on at times, especially when he has his woman stop working and rest while he massages her feet.
But things can go south quickly when he overdoes the worrying. Sometimes that means he is a bit too gentle in bed, or he constantly asks if everything is OK. It can also happen outside the bedroom, if he gets in the way of a mom-to-be taking care of business. It's good for a man to take care of his family, but women these days also like to take care of themselves. A worrier can be a turn off, so learn when it's a good time to lay off.
12 Chef Shame
When a woman is pregnant, her significant other knows that she is going through a lot. Most men are pretty understanding, but eventually they are hoping for a little hanky panky. A smart man knows that getting his woman in the mood might involve making her dinner, especially when she is in no mood to do it herself.
But when a baby is board, even the best chef needs to do his research to make sure that his turn on doesn't turn into a turn off. During the first trimester, especially, but it could go on throughout the pregnancy, moms-to-be can get sick at the idea of many foods. Her significant other needs to be aware of her cravings if he wants to get it right. And he needs to keep up to date because cravings and aversions can turn on a dime — and so can his opportunity for a little lovin'.
11 Body Barriers
Let's get this out there first — pregnant bodies are amazing, gorgeous, beautiful — and sexy. Many men and women are turned on by the changes that go through the body during the nine months of pregnancy, from the bigger breasts to the beautifully rounded belly. Sometimes, though, the body can become a barrier, especially when a man says something negative to his woman while she is growing a baby.
The truth, though, is that a woman's significant other is also likely to gain weight during the pregnancy. It's not just because of the amount of ice cream in the house; it's because of sympathy weight gain. Many times the dads are the ones that never lose the baby weight, and they can be just as sensitive about their bodies. And that lack of confidence can be a turn off for a pregnant woman too.
10 Touchy Moments
Sexy time usually begins with a little cuddling. A man might pull his woman close, give her a sweet kiss and let his hands do the talking. But when the body is going through pregnancy, the same touches that were turn ons in the past can be big turn offs.
Some of the most sensitive parts of a woman are her breasts, and that can make things fun in the bedroom most of the time. But from the very beginning of pregnancy, those same breasts begin to ache. They get bigger, which can be a turn on for the man, but they hurt when they are touched, which can bring an end to the action in no time. By the end of pregnancy — and into the first several months of motherhood — those things hurt, and maybe even leak. It's definitely a touchy subject and a turn off.
9 Naming Negatives
As much as a couple can be excited about welcoming a baby to the family, they can have a hard time making the big decisions when it comes to their child. One of the worst things to argue about is the baby name. Every person has an individual opinion, and even if a mom and dad are on the same page about everything else, they may have very different tastes for names. The big debate can do a lot to show a couple how different they really are.
Some women have their hearts set on certain names, and it can be tough to hear the negatives. Sometimes a man has a bad connotation for a name, such as old girlfriend or a bully from school. That can start a fight or disappoint the mom. It's never a good idea to discuss baby names in the bedroom. It can be a big turn off and totally kill the mood.
8 Baby Love
When a baby is on the way, a woman feels the pressure that she will soon have a little one that is totally dependent on her to survive. The baby needs his mother for food, for comfort, to stay clean and even to get to sleep. It's a big challenge and a mom-to-be can get anxious about her impending role as a parent. She has one baby on the way, and it can be a major turn off if it turns out that her significant other also acts like a baby.
Yes, many women love to mother, and sometimes she has taken care of her significant other throughout their relationship. But his neediness can grate on a woman who is worried about how she will be able to keep a squalling infant alive and happy. She doesn't need any more babies to take care of, and if she comes across one, that can be a big turn off.
7 Nursery Nightmares
For some families, it doesn't hit home that there is a baby on the way until the nursery is set up. There is something about painting the walls and putting together the crib that is a bigger kick in the belly than the one coming from the baby. And while some women find it a turn on to set up their own little baby haven, if the significant other isn't so helpful, it can be a big turn off.
Some families can be totally tested when they try to follow directions and work together to get a crib set up and a dresser put together. A project like that can undue the most devoted couples, but we would hate for it to come at a time when they need each other to get through parenthood. Don't be surprised if it's a turn off, but don't let it be a deal breaker.
6 Baby Talk
Every mom-to-be wants her significant other to be committed to being a great parent, and she may love to imagine her partner as a dad cuddling his newborn or throwing pitches in the backyard when he's bigger. But sometimes things can go a bit too far if a man devolves into baby talk. Some women tend to get into the goo goos and gah gahs a couple of months after the baby's birth, but that doesn't mean that she wants to hear it before the birth.
Sure, a few sweet whispers to the baby bump can be downright adorable. But if her partner's language consists only of baby talk, a pregnant woman can tend to overwhelm her world with baby business. She wants to continue to be a fully well-rounded woman, one who can be both a mother and a partner and a lover. But that can be hard to remember when she only sees her significant other as a father and not as her partner. And that can be a real turn off.
5 Mamma Mia
In that same vein, we have to acknowledge a name that can be one of the biggest turn offs a woman can imagine. While she can't wait to hear her little one call her "mom," we can assure you that she does not want her lover to call her that. While some men may love to be called "big papa," we recommend you keep the word "mama" out of the bedroom if you want it to continue to be a place for some action.
It may go back to the biblical story of Mary, but for some reason we tend to see mothers as pure and nurturing, almost virginal. And that isn't the image that can lead toward some dirty, sexy fun. Even in the second trimester, when a pregnant woman is feeling a hormonal urge that turns her on any time she has the opportunity, one reference to her as a mother will make her think twice about doing the deed. It's such a turn off.
4 Dry Down There
Sometimes, pregnancy itself can be a turn off, and we aren't just talking about the exhaustion or the morning sickness. Sometimes, a significant other needs a new set of tools to help combat the symptoms that can make things less comfortable to get the deed done during those nine months.
Specifically, we are talking about the turn off that happens when a woman is too dry down there. Pregnancy hormones can make it tough for the natural lubricants to flow, even when a woman does feel turned on. Instead of accepting the turn off that comes from nature, a significant other can get a lot more nookie if he comes prepared with a little lube. It may be the first time that a couple needs the artificial aid, but if it helps get the job done, it can help save a relationship.
3 Missionary Position
One of the little known facts about pregnancy is that after the first trimester a woman can't really lay down on her back. The uterus can compress a major blood vessel and cut off the circulation to the baby. Once a woman hears that warning from her doctor, she can feel a major turn off when she thinks about getting busy with her significant other. The missionary position, especially with her on the bottom, could put the baby in danger, and no one is in the mood when they realize that.
Couples may have to get creative during pregnancy when they want to get busy. Even books like "What to Expect When You're Expecting" get into the possible positions that may be better — and much more comfortable — for getting it on with a baby on board. Trying them out can add an element of excitement and, hopefully, be a turn on for the mom-to-be.
The laws of attraction can be simple, and science has even given us a simple answer for the reason that two people feel that magnetic pull. It all comes down to pheromones, a type of hormone that affects human physiology and sends signals to the brain to feel an emotional or physical connection.
During pregnancy, women's bodies go through an entire hormonal change. Some rush in; others rush out. Most of the time, people know about the hormone changes because of mood swings, but they can also mess with the pheromones, which means the attraction between a woman and her significant other can get out of whack. Studies have also shown that men's pheromones can go through changes while their significant other is pregnant, just to add insult to injury. It can take a while for everything to get back to normal, and that may mean a long list of turn offs.
1 Delivery Room Detriment
Some men get through the delivery room unscathed, but it's really rare. We have heard of moms getting turned on in the midst of contractions, and they have an orgasmic birth. But for most, it's a painful, terrifying experience. A man can't really do much to make a difference, but he has to do his best to keep the mom-to-be as comfortable as possible.
He can try to give her a massage and help her with her breathing. But sometimes even the support from her man can be a turn off to a woman who just wants to blame the person who got her pregnant and is responsible for her pain. The delivery room can be filled with landmines for a significant other to get through, and many barely make it out alive. But even if he doesn't do so well, it's an even bigger turn off if he doesn't show up and try.
And don't worry. Dads become much more attractive when they change diapers.
Sources: FitPregnancy, What to Expect, WebMD