Being a mother is a tough responsibility that comes with roles and duties that none of us could expect. Mothers parenting in the modern society, often referred to as ‘millennial moms. are not spared these ups and downs.
The modern day mother approaches her role as a mom differently from her predecessors, marking a new era for motherhood. These mothers do not always conform to the notions and ideas that other moms from different generations followed and are making their own rules as they go.
Millennial moms are characterized by their progressive and forward thinking stance on parenting, and raise their children on a more open philosophy compared to other moms. Since millennial mothers come from a generation that is often thought to be entitled and even a little spoiled, there can be a lot of judgment put on these young mothers.
Some even feel that they have to explain and justify their opinions, decisions and processes toward parenting.
This stark difference means that other moms may not fully comprehend some of our decisions and why we do the things we do. But as mothers struggling in the modern society, we encounter numerous hurdles that others in previous generations may not understand. A lot of the time, we find ourselves wishing and hoping that other moms could get what it is like to parent as a millennial.
Here are 15 things every millennial mom wishes other moms understood.
15 We Are Not Overprotective Just Cautious
Growing up, most of us were allowed to sit in the normal seats in a car without need for a car seat once we reached the toddler years. Infants were sat facing forward, children were allowed to sit in the front seat of a car, and so many other things have since been deemed unsafe.
Today, car seats are mandatory even when our kids become toddlers and it is unheard of for our infants to sit facing forward in their car seat. We are cautious with the foods we feed our children. We are a little hesitant to let our young children play outside unsupervised.
For older moms, this could be seen as being overprotective, but it's only us being cautious. We are do not think our kids are as fragile as eggs, but also we don't want to put them in any danger.
14 It’s Tough Juggling Kids And Work
For many women of older generations, being a mother and housewife was their full time job. This meant they did not have to wake up every morning and report to work or deal with deadlines for presentations, or have sales targets to meet.
Many modern day mothers are juggling their roles as mothers and workers. This means that they not only need to take care of their babies and get everything in order at home, they also have work-related projects to take care of. Anyone doing this can tell you it's no easy feat and can at times mean that you do not have the time (or the energy) to come home and prepare a four-course meal.
We would like other mothers to understand that it is hard to be both a mother and a business or career woman. Therefore, give us a break if the house is not in perfect order or we get someone to help us out with household chores.
13 Why We Take Tons Of Photos
One of the things that other mothers do not understand is why as millennial moms we insist on taking pictures of almost every moment. Many even go ahead and state that it has become a problem as nothing is private or savored anymore.
What many may not realize is that taking pictures and videos is our way of putting away mementos and keeping memories. Growing up most of us only took pictures during special occasions and only have very few pictures of ourselves as kids.
Therefore, we eagerly capture moments and on our phones to ensure that we can always look back on it anytime we want even after our kids are fully grown. Maybe it is our own special way of preserving our babies in that magical age where they are still cute and cuddly or a way to encase our special moments for years and years to come as well as share it with those closest to us.
12 Technology Isn’t A Bad Thing (In Moderation Of Course)
Technology is a big part of our daily lives and millennial moms depend on technology more than their counterparts ever did. Kids are learning from a very early age how to use computers and play online games. Older moms frown upon our dependency on gadgets and connectivity, we only wish they could understand the important role technology plays in our lives.
Moms no longer need to rely only on themselves, but can now find what we need to know online or from others who are going through the same thing or have passed through it. Sharing and hearing our experiences not comforts us but also helps us know that there are others in the same situation.
Moreover, by using our little gadgets we are able to plan the entire family’s calendars from anywhere and can even help our little ones learn.
11 Not Everyone Can Be A Stay-At-Home-Mom
For many moms in previous generations, having kids meant giving up work and becoming a stay at home mom. Many millennial moms do not believe in this and want to conquer it all and do well in the corporate jungle as well as parent. Thanks to feminism, most modern day moms strive to be strong career women as well as have a family.
They want to break the glass ceiling and climb the corporate ladder or become great business ladies with even stay-at-home mothers starting online businesses or blogs.
Moreover, for most, staying at home to raise their kids and take care of their home may not be an achievable option due to the high cost of living which could make one source of income insufficient to support the entire family.
Therefore, all we want is for you to understand that being a working mom does not make us bad mothers but mothers who want to give their children the best and also pursue their goals.
10 Self-Expression Is A Good Thing
A few years back, being a mother put you in a certain box and in some way seemed to dictate how you dress and behave. In today’s society, as millennial mothers we are embracing our personal tastes and individuality. We do not let the society or the role of being a mother change who we are.
Mothers no longer have to dress or act in a different way and can still continue doing things that make them who they are. It does not stop there as mothers are now encouraging and embracing their child’s individuality and sense of self.
We are letting our children decide what they like from what they want to eat to how they want to dress and activities they would like to participate in. This can be baffling and seem extreme to other moms who were taught and shown to behave in certain way. But this does not make us distracted or bad moms and we wish older moms could understand this and stop judging us.
9 There Are Different Ways Of Parenting
Most of our parents had one general method of parenting which was mainly based on how they had been raised and been taught as children. With the emergence of the internet, more studies and intensive research, mothers now have various parenting techniques that millennial mothers are embracing.
Modern day mothers get the chance to choose between varying parenting methods and decide what works best for their families. This means that different households now have different approaches to raising their kids.
This baffles many older mothers who may not completely understand some of these parenting techniques and even think that it might mean there was something wrong with how they raised their children.
But all millennial mothers want you to understand is that they are not trying to challenge any person’s parenting method or spoiling their kids, but instead they're finding a parenting approach that is specific to their child, will fit in with their family and will help them raise healthy independent well-rounded children. Besides, not one size fits all.
8 Attachment Parenting Is Not Spoiling Our Kids
For mothers who opt for attachment parenting, the general sentiment from on lookers is that they are spoiling their kids. This is mainly because other moms do not fully comprehend this type of parenting and may look upon it as spoiling children or indulging the whims of their babies.
On the contrary, attachment parenting is based on giving a child what they need and providing them with unconditional love, comfort and support. For millennial mothers who practice attachment parenting, we would like other moms that we are only striving to give our children the best care we can.
Attachment parenting gets a bad rep because people believe parents are coddling their kids rather than raising them, but attachment parenting t its root is about the parental bond with the children. It's about making the children feel safe and being there for them so they know that mom and dad love them and are never out of reach physically and emotionally.
7 Guilt Is A Real Thing
All mothers fight with feelings of guilt from one thing or another no matter how much they provide for their children. Our innate instinct and drive to stay by our children and provide them with everything they might need to grow and develop makes us easily prone to beating ourselves up whenever something goes awry.
Like any other moms, millennial moms are always fighting with guilty feelings which are normally magnified by the fact that most of us have to work full time as well as parent.
We work hard to provide for our children and give them a good childhood, but since it is hard to maintain balance between all our aspects of our lives, we are often racked with guilt. Therefore, despite seeming to have it all (career or business and family) all we want other moms to understand is that we also struggle with feeling guilty.
6 Both Girls And Boys Can Do The Same Things
For many mothers in past generations, the roles between boys and girls were defined and there was not much of crossing over. Our modern day society embraces people with all types of orientations, and believe that there should be no lines or categories to put people in. As mothers in this society, we are teaching our children that gender lines are no longer important.
Millennial moms tend to dress their children in any colors they deem fit without prescribing to former notions (Girls wore pink while boys were dressed in blue). They encourage their children to participate in activities they like despite traditional roles with our boys doing ballet and girls playing football.
We also teach our children to be tolerant and welcoming of people with their differences. We want other moms to understand that we want our children to embrace who they are and not feel pressure to fit in societal boxes.
5 Organic Food Is Better
Moms from other generations might not understand why we might insist on feeding our children organically grown foods with some arguing that they raised us with normal foods which was never a problem. The fact is some studies on organically grown foods had not been done a few years back and many people may not have known the significance of eating them.
But with so much research being done on the impact chemicals on the body, we are opting for healthier food. This means we are buying food that is grown using healthier methods as well as those grown nearer home with little or no preservatives and of course reading all the ingredients in all the products we buy.
Some of us have gone the extra step of growing our own vegetables on our kitchen windows. We wish other moms could understand this and join our farmer’s market band wagon.
4 We Have So Much Information Available
Thanks to the internet, smartphones, computers or tablets, millennial moms have a lot of information available to them. We no longer have to go through motherhood alone or blindly.
As modern day mothers, we have grown in a world full of information which is only a few clicks or swipes away. This makes us informed on about almost everything. We no longer have to rush to the doctor at every sound our infant makes or go to a nutritionist to find what is healthy for our kids.
We also no longer have to go along with myths and stories that others might have believed such as applying alcohol on our baby’s gums to help with teething as we know better. We are armed with information to help with our day to day activities. We wish our predecessors understood this, and even hope to get them on our team; making them understand that knowledge is power and it is at your fingertips.
3 It's Okay To Take A Break
If you were to ask mothers from several years back, motherhood meant zero time for yourself and absolutely no breaks. This is not the case with modern day mothers who willingly take a break from constantly parenting giving themselves a few hours or a day to treat themselves.
As millennial mothers, taking a break does not mean we do not care or want to get away from our children, but the fact we want to be best version of ourselves for our kids.
By taking a day or an hour off once in a while we take care of ourselves and avoid breaking down. We want other moms to know that it is okay to take a break and give yourself a treat and that it does not mean you are not a good mother in any way. To know that it is okay to come first once in a while and even have a life of your own.
2 We Have Different Ways Of Doing Things
The world has changed in a lot of ways and motherhood and raising children has not been left behind. As millennial mothers, we do a lot of things differently from those who were mothers before us. This does not necessarily mean they may be better or worse but we have a different approach to tackling things.
For instance, we may let our children choose what to eat and even let them decide when to do so. This does not mean that we are letting them make the rules or that we are weak parents, but that we believe in giving them the chance to make decisions and become self-aware.
We want to make older generations understand that the world we live in has changed and some of the things they did while raising us may not be applicable today.
1 We Don't Think We're Better Than Anyone
According to statistics and research done, millennial mothers are more educated than their counterparts with more of them holding degrees than mothers in any other generation. To add on that, having grown in the era of internet and Google modern day mothers have more resources and information at their disposal than their earlier predecessors.
This may make many mothers from previous generations feel as though we think or feel superior in some way to them. This could make them antagonistic and even go on for offence believing that we would not welcome any input or advice. On the contrary, it can be seen that millennial mothers value the advice of other moms (as long as you respect our values and don’t force your opinions on us).
Most of us appreciate and acknowledge the work and input of other mothers.