P-R-E-G-N-A-N-T. Those 8 letters can change a woman’s life forever. For some women, being pregnant is an unexpected event; for others, it’s a moment that they thought would truly never ever come. Once reality has sunk in, you’re ready to share your big life changing news with your friends, family, anyone who is willing to listen. The problem is, did you ever think that you’re going a bit overboard with your announcement?
To be honest, we get it -- you’re pregnant. Congratulations. We were on the receiving end of your ecstatic phone call. We got the baby shower invitation. We’ve liked all of your Tweets and Facebook statuses for the 20th time this week. Yay for you. Honestly, truly. Forgive us if you think we’re doing a piss poor job of showing our excitement. It’s just that we have 67,393,782 things to do that do not directly involve your or your little bundle of joy. #sorrynotsorry.
Sometimes in the excitement of pregnancy you end up annoying others. Here’s 15 things pregnant women do that truly get under our skin and piss us off. It’s time to ‘fess up mamas-- how many of these sins are you guilty of committing?
15 Posting Weekly Updates On Your Growing Belly
Pregnancy results in your body undergoing in an amazing transformation.At the end of the first month, your baby is the size of a single grain of rice. By the end of your last month, your baby is fully developed and ready to come home any day. How incredible is that? The problem is that the weekly updates ruin the surprise for us. If pregnancy makes you feel tired, how is it that you have time to write beautiful messages on a blackboard in colored chalk every single week? Not to mention, where did you get all those props, and how do you come up with those ridiculous poses? We don’t want to rain on your parade, and tell your how to run your own social media account. But at the same time, we really can go without the weekly updates.
14 Making A Facebook Account For The Unborn Baby
Claiming your child’s email address is one thing, and uploading photos of cute baby feet and toothless smiles are another; but making a social media account for the baby seems to be a trend that we can’t fully wrap our heads around. What’s worse is when you start posting as your baby. It’s not only weird, it’s downright creepy. It’s normal that you’d want to save your baby’s Instagram handle for later on in life. After all, celeb babies like Asahd Khaled and Dream Kardashian already have their very own Instagram with tons of followers. On top of that, there’s plenty of stories of successful child models who were scouted and discovered on social media. While it’s super tempting to create a Twitter, Facebook. Instagram and Pinterest account for your baby while you’re in labor, just hold off a bit, will you?
13 Overdoing On Healthy
Oh boy. I think we all know this mama. Super green and crunchy. When she’s not training for the upcoming marathon, she’s got yoga on Monday and Friday and Pilates on Thursday and Sundays. She's got a binder full of well-balanced smoothie recipes. Instagram-worthy food prep Sundays. The baby’s room is decked out in fair trade, organic cotton. Do I need to go on? It’s great that you’re being healthy! After all you’re nurturing a life inside of you! Sometimes, though, those fad diets and workout are just that -- fads than can be very detrimental to your health and your baby’s health. So before you try to convert us into following your latest cleanse, how about consulting with a medical professional? And keep your opinions on my greasy pizza to yourself, thank you very much.
12 Using Pregnancy As An Excuse For Everything
Come on now; I think every mama out there is guilty of at least this one. Sometimes being pregnant serves as a valid excuse for getting out of things you’d really rather not be doing. Don’t want to walk across the parking lot on your Target run? Try to guilt trip someone into handing over their front row parking space. Jury duty? Better pretend to go into labor, no matter how far along you look. Want a seat on the train? Rub your belly and sigh to gain sympathy. But when you’re blaming your unborn child on everything, now that’s a bit tacky. Slacking off on chores, eating out (or too much), calling in “sick,” being short tempered… the list goes on. Just own up to your own actions already!
11 Showing Off The Bump In The Most Unattractive Way Possible
Ever notice how those “innocent” posts on baby boards are really just full of humble brag? Some new user uploads a photo of a perfectly toned tummy: “Hi mamas! Soo glad to have found this group of mamas with the same birth month. I’m already at Week 22. So far I’ve had incredible cravings but I only gained 5 pounds! What’s wrong with me? I’ve been looking at everyone's posts and your bumps are so much bigger than mine! Jelly! I can’t wait for my bump to get bigger!” Then, on the other side of the spectrum you have mamas who can’t seem to stop showing off their darn bump. How many boudoir maternity shoots do you need? We’re not asking you to go into hiding until you have your baby. Just stop shoving your bump in our faces already.
10 Working Out Like You're Not Pregnant
An extension of the hyper crunchy granola mamas, these mamas are here to shame you. They’ll let you know that pregnancy is not a time for relaxing and indulging. No, pregnancy is a time to get fit and stay in the gym. Pregnancy got you tired? I won a triathlon when I was 7 months pregnant -- all while holding down a job in corporate sales that took me all over Europe. What’s your excuse? Uh. Let me start: hyperemesis gravidarum, a bladder that needs emptying every 30 minutes, sciatica, and swollen ankles, to name a few. And while we can agree that it’s awesome that you can shimmy upside down on the pole at 40 weeks pregnant, some of us just ain’t cut out for that life. Nor are we about to try.
9 Everything On The Gift Registry Is Designer
We went to your gender reveal party, played the stupid games, and now know that you're having a girl. Congratulations! Now, three weeks later there’s an invite to a baby shower and a list of items you’d like for the new baby. That’s no problem. There’s so much that a first time mama needs. There's diapers, wipes, a bassinet, baby monitor, a stroller, compression tights, nursing pillow, Marc Jacobs diaper bag, Urban Decay Naked Eyeshadow Palette, Fenty beauty foundation, La Mer night cream...wait a second. Gift registries are fine, but don’t try to sneak in expensive gifts that are very clearly intended for you! It’s also annoying when your list is filled with expensive baby gear and constant bombardment of “nothing but the best for MY baby!” Maybe fill your Amazon Wish List with items from various price ranges. Otherwise you’ll end up with nothing.
8 TMI Posts On Social Media
Where to go with this one without getting into the TMI details we are actively trying to avoid? Being pregnant is not all fun and excitement. Especially if it’s your first pregnancy, you’ll be blindly navigating uncharted waters. Which is why is totally understandable that you will have questions, as long as you keep in mind that all of your questions and status updates are for the entire world to see. And, even if you make your accounts private, there’s no guarantee that all of your followers will keep your secrets. So, please spare us the posts of your lack of or increase in libido. We’re really not interested in knowing that you and your hubby had to try out so many new positions last night because the bump was in the way. Nor, do we want to see photos accompanied by the text, “Is this my mucus plug?” Please, spare us.
7 The Baby Naming Drama
You just knew this one would be on here, didn’t you? Maybe you’ve listened patiently as pregnant friend explained several spelling variations of “Ashley” and “Megan.” Maybe it was your shoulder than she cried on when Carol in Accounting “stole” Ashleiygh for her. We know naming your baby is an incredibly important event. After all, after life, our names are one of the earliest gifts given to us by parents or relatives. Cultures all over the world even have elaborately detailed rituals on how to name a baby. But I’m pretty sure those rituals don’t involve annoying everyone around you with endless questions of, “What do you think about Caydenne and Jaylee?” What’s worse is when you ask us for suggestions and get upset that the names don’t “suit” your baby. Don’t bother asking us if you were already set on “Navvie” from day one!
6 Refusing To Leave The House
Being pregnant can really drain your energy and leave your feeling tired. And if you have harsh symptoms like extreme morning sickness, edema, sciatica and migraine headaches, it’s perfectly natural that you’d rather stay in.You might not feel as confident as you used to as you gain weight and your body grows along with you bump. But, there’s no need to become a total recluse just because you’re pregnant. Nobody expects a pregnant woman to go clubbing or out for drinks. Still, your friends, family, and partner care for you. If you’re not in the mood to cook, arrange a potluck with a few friends. Wear something cute, do your makeup and go out with your honey on a lunch date. Resist the urge to stay in and have at least one social event planned per month.
5 The Constant Bragging
Bragging about being pregnant is not only annoying, it’s downright hurtful for mamas out there who have suffered a miscarriage, TTCing, or going through yet another round of IVF or other treatments. We really want to be happy for you, and we know we’re being unreasonable. But at the same time, it honestly hurts when we’re reminded of something that is once again out of our reach. Look ladies, we’re not out here to tell you how to run your own social media accounts. Yes, we know we can “scroll past.” But when it comes to a gleefully delighted co-worker or neighbor, there’s not much avoidance we can do, Still, some of us would really appreciate it if you threw some compassion our way. We’re not asking for a pity party, but please remember that a bit of compassion really goes a long way.
4 Throwing A Gender Reveal Party
If you’ve never been to a gender reveal party then you’ve probably at least seen one of the many viral clips on the web. Proud parents to be surrounded by family and friends. Sometimes these gender reveals are accompanied by engagements. It’s a sign of the times that a video of a couple at their gender reveal party can get hundred of thousands or even millions of views. Why have gender reveal parties grown so popular in modern day society and become so special? First of all, it’s not a gender reveal party, it’s a sex reveal party. Secondly, why does knowing your baby’s private bits so central to this party? And why do we have to play these ridiculously dumb games and wear these stupid costumes? It’s truly baffling and just leaves us with so many unanswered questions.
3 Acting Like You're The First Pregnant Woman
You can’t understand the physical, mental, and emotional changes your body goes through unless you’ve been pregnant. And even if you’ve been pregnant before, each pregnancy is so radically different, you still don’t know what to expect. It’s only natural that a woman will grumble and complain about the changes she’s experiencing. But, why do some pregnant women moan and complain over the tiniest things? Sleeping with a giant bump is hard. Been there done that. Read about it on your Facebook for the 26th consecutive night. Wow, your bump moved -- again. Thanks for sharing another video (but not really).. Let’s say it again for those who think this list is intended to hate on pregnant women. We’re really happy for you, but please stop rubbing it in our faces. You’re not the first woman to ever be pregnant, so just stop acting like it already!
2 Over-The-Top Baby Showers
Baby showers used to be a low-key but fun gathering where friends and family would surprise a mom to be with essentials for the baby. Traditionally, baby showers were only for the firstborn and attended only by women-- but in the age of self-centered social media, who cares about tradition? Nowadays, baby showers are meticulously planned events that require RVSPing to a lavishly decorated house or hotel room. There’s nothing wrong with having multiple baby showers, especially if you have specific groups of people planning them, like family, or co-workers, or sorority sisters. But, do you need to invite us again, and do I need to bring another gift? As a matter of fact, why are you hosting your own baby shower? Call me old fashioned, but baby showers aren’t supposed to be thrown for yourself. That’s not how it works.
1 Yes, We Know... Pregnancy Sucks
Only women who have been pregnant can understand the toll it takes on the body and mind. Everyday is full of the unexpected. Your fears are never really put at rest, no matter how much your baby grows. With that said, pregnancy sucks. You can’t drink alcohol anymore. You’re steadily gaining weight. You can’t see your toes. The smell of anything makes you sick. The baby keeps kicking your ribs. For those of us who’ve been there, we know it sucks, and we’re here to support you. But there’s so much complaining that we can take before we unfollow, unfriend, and block you. No one’s expecting you to walk around with a dopey grin on your face 24/7. But, keep in mind that being pregnant sucks but when it’s all over you finally will be able to hold your little boy or girl.
Sources: Mumsnet, Glamour, The Sun UK, Baby Center, Babble