It seems like it is an age-old question, does the baby feel anything when mom and dad get busy! Expecting parents everywhere will always wonder what their little one feels when they are getting it on, if anything. It is so common, that a lot of men (my husband included) wonder if they are hurting the little one every time they have intercourse.
The problem is, we may never know exactly what happens to that little bean, or what they are thinking. I don’t think we’ve met anyone who remembers their life in the womb, so there is no one who can tell us what it is like. Many people are quite confident that your baby has no recollection or awareness of what is going on with mom and dad. Just like they don’t know if you are watching TV or doing laundry. Also, maybe lucky for us, they are way to young to place any judgement on what you are doing (Phew!).
Most people don’t get concerned about the baby’s well-being during sex until the third trimester, that is because the baby is much more pronounced and more relatable to us as an actual baby and not just a fetus anymore. A lot of couples (usually mom) do not feel so amorous in their third trimester, as they are in a constant state of uncomfortableness. A lot of dads also become uninterested due to the fact that they think their baby is watching them!
Even if we may never know exactly what the baby thinks or feels, we can make some pretty educated guesses based on what is happening with mom’s body. Here are 15 things that the baby is most likely to feel while mom and dad boink!
15 Is There Pain?
The biggest concern that couples face when they want to become intimate while pregnant is if it will cause actual physical harm to the baby. The answer is most likely no. Unless, you are practicing in some Fifty Shades of Grey activities, sex is very unlikely to cause any harm to the baby, no matter how big he or she is. Women need to remember that their cervix is covered by a thick mucous plug which acts as a great barrier to prevent anything from entering the uterus.
They also must remember that their baby is in a very protective amniotic sac that is filled with fluid. When things are submerged in water, they become weightless. Just imagine how you feel when you are floating on water. No matter how much the water waves and shakes, it doesn’t harm you because it acts as a natural protective barrier.
14 Are They Mentally Aware?
It is very common for expecting parents to feel like they are being watched by their unborn baby. It also creates a very well, but not needed, sense of embarrassment. It is like we already want to protect our child from seeing anything that is not appropriate and that can be severely damaging through their later life. In one aspect, congratulations! Your maternal instincts have kicked in as you are already worried about your little one. On another hand, this is not something you need to worry about.
Babies in the womb can’t see. Well, in the third trimester, their eyesight has developed but they can’t actually see mom and dad wrestling. It is so dark in the womb, and while we may imagine that they are scrunched down and using your cervix like a peep hole, we can assure you they have no idea what is going on.
13 They Can Hear
The bad news is, that while babies can not see what is going on, they can most likely hear it. Hearing develops fairly early in the womb, so they gain the ability to hear the world outside them fairly early. From the second trimester on, babies will enjoy hearing the world outside the womb, it can provide hours of entertainment for someone who doesn’t really have much else to do. They love when mom and dad talk to them, and they will usually respond with some punches and kicks.
Here is the negative, they will most likely hear the action going on in the outside world. Unless, you and your partner have the ability to be super quiet, they will hear every moan and murmur. Don’t worry, I won’t ever bring bad news without good news. The good news is that while they will hear noises, they have no idea what those noises mean, they are that innocent!
12 Bumps Along The Way
OK, so we have covered sight and sound, and I hope any nervous parents out there are feeling are a bit relieved. Until now, that is. The baby is in tune with no one’s body more than the mom. They feel every skip, trip and bump. We are all adults here, so I think we all know that when two people are intimate, there is usually an element of movement, usually the up and down kind. This is bound to make that baby bump move and shake.
This the baby does feel. It will feel the rhythmic rocking of mom’s hips, but don’t worry. Like I said earlier, it has no way of knowing what is going on. It probably just thinks mom went horseback riding or on a bumpy car ride. Also, don’t worry that the bumping is hurting the baby, there is so much fluid in their sac that it will just feel like they are at a waterpark.
11 What About The Big O?
Everything mom feels, the baby feels. The baby feels if mom is mad, sad, or happy. This would lead us to believe that the baby can also feel if mom has the big O. When a woman reaches the big O status, it is no secret that she feels good. She feels happy and relaxed. So, if you are following me here, the baby also will feel happy and relaxes.
When a woman has an orgasm, there I said it – we are all adults here. Her brain releases Serotonin, which is known as the happiness hormone. Serotonin is the chemical in your brain that regulates your mood, and makes you feel happy. When it is released at such a high level, it works to make mom super happy! Other activities that release Serotonin is sitting in the sunlight, exercising, and having a good cheat meal! Happy mom = happy baby!
10 Another One About the O!
We’re not done with the orgasm posts yet. Another wonderful thing that happens when a mother has an orgasm is the brain releases oxytocin. Oxytocin is the hormone that is released by a woman’s brain that encourages the uterine to contract. Now, don’t worry, you are not going to go into labour if you have an orgasm, the world would not be that cruel. Your baby will possibly feel a slight squeeze, caused by these ‘contractions’.
This is why people suggest woman who want to induce labour should try having sex to bring on contractions. Sadly, this has not been proven to be effective, and it will only work if your body is ready to go into labour on its own. The slight squeeze your baby will feel will also not harm them, it will just feel like they are getting a little bit of a hug.
9 Poke In The Head?
Here we are going to address the concern a lot of parents to be (men specifically) have about intercourse when pregnant. That he will some how poke the baby in the head. Sorry to tell you guys, it doesn’t matter how well endowed you are, you are not even going to come close to touching that baby, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but the baby is a lot more further away that you probably think it is. It can be a valid concern, as sometimes if a women is far enough into the pregnancy, it may feel like the baby is about fall out.
There is a lot of things a man’s, well, friend, would have to get through to even be close enough to lightly tap the baby’s head. First, the cervix. Not only is the cervix not big enough if the woman hasn’t started to dilate, but it is covered with a tough and thick mucous that is protecting your baby from situations just like this. You would also need to penetrate the amniotic sac, which is sometimes difficult for doctors to do.
8 Baby Gets A Little Pep To Her Step
A lot of women may notice an increase in their little one’s movement after sex. This is because all the work mom and dad were doing have given their little bean a little more energy. All the movement and rocking will have most likely waken that baby up from a little snooze. And just like any of us after a good nap, we have a bit more energy.
Also, think about the state a woman is in after having sex, she is out of breath and her heart is racing. She likely has adrenaline coursing through her body. All of this will amp up that baby and get his (or her) little heart beating faster. We can’t say it enough, if your baby is moving around a lot, it is not because he is in distress or at all bothered by what happens. It is simply due to the pounding of mom’s heart.
7 Does The Baby Get Covered In …
Some people have concerns that the baby will somehow come in contact with a man’s sperm when the parents get busy. No, the baby does not feel that at all. The cervical mucous plug is preventing any of his little soldiers from getting through. It is your body’s way of preventing a pregnancy when you are already pregnant. Rest assured the baby does not notice anything, and has no fellow swimmers in there with him.
There is a warning though as sperm does contain prostaglandin. What prostaglandin has the ability to do is stimulate the cervix and cause contractions. It can soften the cervix and cause a woman to start dilating. This is not completely accurate for those who are worried about premature labour. Sex, even with ejaculation, will not cause premature labour in a pregnancy that has been relatively normal and healthy.
6 The Baby Can Feel Positions
Even though the baby may not be aware of what you are doing between the sheets, they will be able to tell which position you are in. You can thank gravity for this one. If a woman is on her back, then the baby will likely be forced to the furthest region of the womb. It is the same for any other position, if a mom is on top, or even on all fours (yup, I went there) then the baby will be left swinging there.
Again, I will state that the baby has no clue what is going on. They just think that mom and dad are rolling around having a party. If a mom and dad constantly change positions, this can also get baby’s movements to kick up a notch, who wouldn’t be after being jostled around. On the other hand, all the movements could rock the baby into a blissful sleep.
5 Some Extra Belly Rubs
Baby’s love when someone rubs the belly from the outside. A lot of couples make little games out of this, poking and prodding the belly to see if the little one will respond with a kick or a punch. If anyone has a husband or partner like mine, they will love you a little bit more when you are pregnant. Belly rubbing became a very special part of intimacy. The belly got extra love, and if the belly got extra love then the baby got some extra love, as they can definitely feel the outside touches.
What makes this sometimes awkward for mom and dad is if the baby does respond. Nothing may put out the flame quite like a kicking baby while mom and dad are occupied together. Some people who are not entirely comfortable having sex with their pregnant partner may feel like this a sign that the baby wants them to stop. It’s not, the baby is just responding from the loving touches.
4 Under Pressure
The baby is more than likely going to feel some pressure throughout the event. It is not just the big O that causes pressure in the womb. Throughout sex, women will subconsciously squeeze their abdomen together. Again, we do this without realizing it, it is just a side effect of the pleasure we receive from sex. The baby does not realize why the walls are slowly closing in, and they are probably not bothered by them. I say probably only because we can not ask them, but I would bet money that they are not bothered.
This is another moment when a mom may feel he baby kick in response. This can be an awkward moment for mom as well. She is doing her thing, which she knows is not child appropriate and all of a sudden she receives a little kick as if to say ‘hey, don’t forget I am in here.’ Don’t worry, your baby is not judging you.
3 Healthy Heartbeat
A lot of women noticed an increase in the rate of their little one’s heartbeat after sex. This can cause a lot of concern to pregnant ladies everywhere, as they often think that means their little one is in distress. It doesn’t, it simply means that mom had a good time. Babies enter a state of euphoria when their mom has an orgasm which can increase their heart rate.
An increased heart rate after intercourse, does not last long, so your little one’s heartbeat should be back to normal very soon after. An increased heart rate is also not always a bad thing. When someone exercises their heart rate increases which has been proven to be good for blood circulation as well as oxygen. So, while mom may be worried about the increased heart rate, your baby is not in distress, he is just coming down from an euphoric high.
2 “I’m Hungry”
OK, this one is completely out of left park, but I am going to assume one thing your baby may feel during sex is hunger. I am assuming this because at the rate I ate during my pregnancy, it seemed my baby couldn’t go 10 minutes without a snack. Therefore, if a romp in the sack is longer than ten minutes, the baby must get hungry. Babies need constant nutrition when growing inside the womb, so it may be likely that mom will get hit with a weird craving during sex.
It may be a good idea to have some snacks in the bedside table and hope that your partner doesn’t mind if you pull out a cookie in the middle of the act. I know I usually get a bit peckish whenever I do something that is even a little energy depleting. We need to re-fill our gas tank, and that fuel goes right to the baby.
1 I Love You
This is more one that we really HOPE the baby feels while mom and dad are getting it on. We hope they feel the love coming through. It may sound cheesy, but being intimate is the ultimate sign of love, and it is the very act that blessed parents to be with their little jelly bean. Chances are that your little one does feel the love coming through from mom and dad.
They can hear it in the voices and they can feel it in the loving touches to the belly. They can also feel it through all the wonderful hormones that are being released in mom’s brain and are coursing through her body. A loving and nurturing home is really all a baby needs (beside food and such). You can help your baby get an early start on feeling all the love when they are in utero, by having a little sweet time in the bedroom … or kitchen, we don’t judge.
Sources: Romper.com, Babycentre.co.uk