Infertility is one of the more unhappy words in the English language, and for one out of every 10 US couples it's their reality. While most people assume it's typically a woman's problem conceiving, in actuality one third of cases are male related, one third female and the remaining third are a combination of the man and the woman or due to unknown causes.

When the man is suspected to have the fertility issue, it can affect his view of himself and he may be reluctant to deal with the problem, let alone seek help. He may have difficulty talking about it, even or maybe especially, with the woman he loves. This can create tension and distance in the most solid of relationships, so pursuing pregnancy while nurturing the relationship can be an exacting job requiring much sensitivity and love.

Working through the difficulties and making decisions that affect the rest of your lives is pressured enough, there may also be outside pressures to contend with as well, such as well-meaning friends and family members who want to know what's the hold up. All these things can pile on the stress, which can have a negative impact on achieving pregnancy. However, remember, 25 to 35 percent of infertile couples will conceive without any treatment at all.

15 Kid Gloves

Men are often caught off-guard by the idea they may have a fertility issue. One reason is that they don't see their reproductive system as complicated as they surely do a woman's. And unless there's an accident, a surgery or some significant health issue they won't see it coming that they have the issue. Being able to father a child is tied up in a man's view of his masculinity and to have problems can fill him with self-doubt or recrimination. He may avoid people with kids, pull away from his wife and indulge in "manly" activities to bolster that lack of confidence.

He may be thinking it's unfair to hold his woman to him, since he may not be able to provide her with a child. He may think she will no longer desire him. Of course, none of that will be true! Women need to approach their partners with sensitivity and love. Remind him that if the tables were turned, she knows he wouldn't blame or abandon her, and she loves him just as much! Explain the odds of thirds in infertility, and that this is a team thing. They are in it together, no matter what!

14 Cut The Vices Together

Women know they should get their lives in order if they want to get pregnant. They try to lose weight if that's something they should do. They stop drinking, at least to excess, they quit smoking and toking and definitely no party girl scene with recreational drugs. But guys, they figure they show up, do the deed and they are good. Not so fast, dude! Actually, drinking, smoking, and doing drugs are factors that affect male fertility, too. So since this is a team effort, you both need to get into ship-shape and drop the vices pronto. If you tend to go out weekends to the same hot spots, change up your routine. Invite friends over for more sedate fun where you won't be tempted by old habits. Have a glass of wine here or there, but don't pull out the beer (or other) bong for any reason! If this seems insurmountable, perhaps some other problems need tending to before a bambino is on deck.

13 Cool It!

Guys' junk is outside their bodies for a reason, and that reason is NOT visual comedy, despite what you may suspect. Nope, it's to maintain a cooler temperature for the best shelf life for sperm. When guys soak in hot tubs or hot baths, take saunas or even ride on hot motorcycles or even bike seats, they can raise those scrotal temps too high for the little guys to survive. If this is part of a regular lifestyle, it's much more likely to be a problem. Just consider it a temporary ban on hot stuff. Actually, it's also a good idea to switch from tighty whities to some looser, cooler, boxers. (You know you wanted him to, anyway!) Even those can raise temps in the testicles too high for proper sperm production. They even make special underwear with cooling liners. Yeah, like ice underwear. You can try to talk him into that, but I wouldn't hold my breath.

12 Boning Up For Testing

Guys may be a little nervous about the idea of fertility tests when it's their reproductive organs in question. Let them know what is typical and how to prepare both physically and emotionally for what's ahead. Often it's a 3-prong approach: first, a general physical exam; then a sperm analysis and let him know there are home versions so in other words, just a free porn pass; and thirdly, a blood test. Not so bad, really all in all. The one that will concern them the most, likely will be the results of the sperm analysis. Find some straightforward, written for guys, materials on what they are testing for and what is a typical result. By knowing what's ahead, it will take a load of anxiety off their shoulders.

11 A Health Nut?

Like cutting out vices like smoking and drinking, a couple wanting to get pregnant both need to work on exercising regularly and eating a healthy, balanced diet. Note, I did not say diet as a verb. Nope, just learn to eat in a healthy manner on a daily basis. Stop frying everything. Cut out all the sugary drinks or at the very least reduce all the bad stuff. Try to work in as many veggies and fruits, as well as whole grains as possible. Snack on air popped popcorn or granola bars. Or as my man calls them chocolate dipped tree bark. Make strides to change your lifestyle overall to a more healthy one, but one that you can both sustain together, day in and day out.

Try to work out 20 minutes minimum a few times a week. By being fitness buddies, you'll be more likely to stick to it. Think about it; you won't want him showing you up, will you? Nope! This can help make you healthier and your man as well, and that means better odds for making a baby.

10 Learn The Treatment Options

If you should get a diagnosis of what may be preventing your man from getting you pregnant, it's time to read up so you can ask the best questions and make the best decisions for you both. For instance, should it be due to hormonal factors, medication will probably be the prescribed treatment regimen. If it's a plumbing issue, a surgical procedure is likely to help. So it's time to read up and find out what the procedures usually are, what the risks are and what are the odds of success. By arming yourselves with facts, you can ask docs the most important questions and make sure the treatment protocol jives well with your plans and desires, and that you think your doc is competent to do the job.

9 Keep Home Fires Burning

Trying to have a baby should be fun, but when it's not easy, it can stop being fun. In fact, it can be downright stressful! So to deal with the stress, it's important for a couple to find time to be a couple outside of being a couple-trying-to-overcome-infertility. Do the things you love to do together, unless that used to be packs of cigarettes chased by bottles of gin, followed by hours of hot-tubbing and sword juggling. Then of course, find new pass times to share. Don't send mean face emojis to remind him your ovulating, or circle your fertile days in angry red on the calendar. Instead, find new ways to connect, flirt and love on one another until this stage of life has passed to the next. Whatever comes, this is the building block of the rest of it all. You and your main squeeze against the odds, against the world!

8 Extra Help

Sometimes despite our best efforts, things can still get distanced or strained. It may not be anyone's fault, and that may not be the best question to answer, anyhow. If that should occur, it's imperative that you don't just stand by and take selfies by the collapse of everything. Get up and work harder. Find a support group for couples who are having trouble conceiving. One big resource is the group RESOLVE, so look up a chapter in your neck of the woods. Another option is to ask the fertility doc for a referral to a therapist or counselor. Many reproductive doctors have experts with experience in this particular field of marriage counseling that they recommend, so just ask. Many men will be reluctant to outsource their problems, so maybe even just check out online support at first. There are plenty of groups out there! Whatever you do, don't ignore problems and expect them to shrink away.

7 Start With Downward Facing Dog

You may catch your man's attention if you start by talking about downward facing dog position, but you may quickly lose him when he realizes your not talking about a new sexual position, but rather a yoga one! Actually, yoga is a great activity to try out together. It will keep you flexible, improve your fitness and lower your stress levels. Plus, couples who do such activities together find themselves bonding. You can take a class, and some hospitals offer free ones, by the way, or you can find an app or something on TV. Don't expect to be doing pretzely things in a few weeks, but just stick with it for the best results. I'm sure there are even poses intended to improve fertility, as they seem to have one for everything else, but the idea is to bond and relax, and improve fitness levels.

6 Learn About ART

No, not Monet or Picasso. Assisted reproductive technology or ART includes such things as in vitro fertilization, intrauterine insemination and intracytoplasmic sperm injection. Related options would include sperm donors or surrogates, depending on a couple's particular needs and troubles. It's important once those tests have been "graded" that you know what options are most likely to work, how they work, and if you both are suitable candidates. Oh, yeah and then there's the cost and if you have insurance that'll put something on the tab. Some ART is reasonably priced and has high success rates depending on the couple's situation, while others are in the range of house costs if multiple attempts are required. But knowing, while scary, is better always than not knowing.

5 Take The Masculine Down A Notch

Sometimes fertility options are counterintuitive. You'd think a man taking male hormones, working out strenuously or taking male supplements that are meant to boost male performance and intensity would boost his baby-making powers, but the opposite is true. It's good to work out regularly, but really intense physical training can decrease a man's fertility. Steroids actually shrink the testicles, and that can never be good, but especially if trying to conceive. Some men may feel reluctant to abandon these practices or supplements, especially if the idea of sterility is messing with their sense of their own masculinity. But their manhood isn't based on muscle mass and deep grunting workouts, or chest thumping antics and you need to let your guy know that.

4 Give It Time

Time is a blessing and curse to everyone. We can be hyper aware of it, such as when waiting by a phone for test results, or an "I made it OK!" call. It can slip by us like a stealth fighter, and leave us breathless at how much of it has passed. It's said it can heal all wounds. Time can be an enemy in fertility, or a friend. Sometimes couples just need more time to get lucky; they may not even need or get treatment. Others may need time to build their health, get some medication or treatment, and wait to see if time was indeed on their side. But by giving yourselves the gift of time, and using it well, you give yourselves the best chance at finding your path to creating a family.

3 Vacay-Time

Sometimes getting away from it all is exactly the best medicine a couple needs. It may provide that connection time they need to go back home and face the grind again, and the strength to make family building decisions. Or it may be like some other lucky couples, that they find themselves so away from it all, so relaxed that they forget about fertility and find it anyway. Some couples even plan conception-moons, or trips to get away during her fertile period, and hope that a new romantic surrounding away from jobs and nuisances will do the trick. It works for a number of people, and if you don't come home with the best of souvenirs, you should at least come home with a stronger bond and lovely memories. A win-win, if you ask me!

2 Adoption Options

If all avenues of options for fertility treatment has been explored, and no baby has arrived, it is time to discuss the adoption option. Be completely honest with yourself and your partner about your fears, feelings and thoughts. If it's not for you, you cannot forge ahead for your partner. You have to find what's right for you both as a family. Perhaps surrogacy is a better option for you. Or maybe adoption is right, but you have to hone in on what kind of adoption. International? Domestic? Private or open? Special needs? Do you want to foster parent first?

Talking with an adoption professional may steer you in the right direction. Also, read up on the topic and talk to adoptive families to learn about their strengths, concerns and challenges. Don't do it secretly wishing for a "child of your own." An adoptive child deserves a parent that wants them for themselves! And that's a myth; only about 5 percent of couples who adopt become pregnant later.

1 The Childfree Lifestyle

Sometimes life takes us down an entirely different path than we imagined. Is it the path we ourselves would have originally chosen? Maybe not, but finding your own way in life and finding peace in it is highly rewarding. Many couples find that when a child never comes, it was their way and they find their lives to be as fulfilling and rewarding as anyone's. Look at Oprah! OK, well without the oodles of money, maybe, but you get my point. Read about the childfree or childless lifestyle and see what you two think. Discuss how it feels and how you can imagine your life as a couple, and only as a couple. Do you have nieces and nephews? Would you like to mentor kids? Would you like to travel the world together, without worries of dragging around kids into less than kidfriendly environments? Imagine what that life could be and see if that is a possible fit for you two? No one can tell you your path but yourselves.

Sources: Parents.com, Resolve.org, MayoClinic.org, AmericanPregnancy.org, WebMD.com, PlannedParenthood.org, Web.Stanford.edu, WomensHealth.gov