Are we pro-life? Are we pro-choice? Are we stuck in the middle with no opinion because it is not affecting us personally? As women, we are the carriers of life, if we choose to be. If rape is not part of the circumstance, it is our choice to become sexually active. It is our choice whether or not we use birth control. It is our choice with whom we share our bodies.
Whether people like it or not, if we get pregnant it is ultimately our choice if we are going to keep our baby. We may be heavily influenced by our families, partners, religious beliefs, and friends but at the end of the day it is our body and our choice. Although some may argue that the life within us isn’t ours and that it is a separate entity from us that argument still doesn’t keep us from having the final word about what will happen to the baby if we become pregnant.
Many people want to tell us to do with our bodies. Many people may try to force us to do what they want us to with our bodies. For now, the law is on our side. Although, the law says one thing the people closest to us may not be in agreement. They may try to force us to bend to their will. They may try to force us to keep a baby we don’t want or force us to abort a baby we do want.
Here are some confessions from women who felt forced to keep a child they did not want.
15 The Tragic Aftermath
Would she still be alive if she were allowed to have the abortion? No one will ever know. It sounds like this 15-year-old girl had to live through many hard times. She was violated in more ways than one and most likely the culmination of all of these hardships that she had to endure, all lead to her final choice to end her own life.
The stress of trying to raise the newborn baby of her rapist could have been what set her over the edge. A woman’s right to choose is still an option in this country. It is for now anyway and many Planned Parenthood supporters are fighting very hard right now to keep it that way. Even though some abortion clinics have been shut down, there is still hope that our reproductive rights will remain our own.
14 A Slave To Motherhood
While many of us look forward to the day that we are honored for all the hard work we put into being mothers, there are others who dread this day for many reasons. Some women hate being mothers. Some women have lost their own mother. Some women may have lost a child. I rarely hear women complaining of motherhood as enslavement as that word is loaded with hate and resentment. However, I don’t know what it feels like to carry the child of a rapist. Along with the lifelong suffering this mother must endure from being a rape victim her child is also forced to have a mother who views motherhood as putting her life on hold. The child also suffers when he is unwanted. How hurtful it must feel to be unwanted by your own mother.
13 A Mother's Punishment
Punishment is such a harsh word and a harsh fate. If this teenager’s mother truly forced her to have her child to punish her then that is cruel and unusual punishment. That is someone’s life. That “punishment” is person who most likely wants to feel wanted, loved and cared for. How sad for this child to have a miserable mother and evil grandmother. This woman wanted an abortion, yes. She was also open to the option of adoption. Sounds like this Mama has an unhealthy home life and has created an unhealthy environment for a child to be raised in. Children are smart. They can sense when they are loved. They undoubtedly look around at other children and notice the way they are treated. Is this type of life better than an abortion or adoption?
12 Growing Up A Justin Bieber Fan
This is a chance every woman takes when she makes the decision or is forced to have a child. We don’t know if our child will be intellectually disabled, physically disabled, have autism, or one day become a Justin Bieber fan. One might think that an unwanted and hated child may be more likely to become a serial killer or pedophile but you never know. Does having a horrible mother cause mental issues down the line? People many times blame their issues on their parents.
Some girls have, “Daddy issues” that they blame on not getting enough attention from their father’s. Some people have “commitment issues” that they blame on having unfaithful parents. If a child knows his mother wanted to abort him and only carried him to term because she had no other choice, then that has to hurt. Hopefully, they won’t grow up wanting to inflict that pain on others.
11 When The Hate Rises
Just the title, “Rape Baby,” makes me cringe. How would someone feel knowing that they were the product of their biological father raping their biological mother? How horrible it is that this woman has experienced so much pain. I wish she wouldn’t feel the need to make her child suffer as a result of her suffering. This Mama hates her kid so much that she wanted to hand him over to a rapist. When her family blocked that move she just magnifies the hate times 100. If we know anyone like this let’s offer them help for their sakes and for the sake of the baby. Sometimes people don’t think of seeing a licensed counselor on their own and they need the recommendation or nudge. While in the midst of turmoil sometimes it’s rough to see a way out.
10 A Grateful Decision
“Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I die before I wake. I pray the Lord my soul to take.” This Mama has the chance to say bedtime prayers with her son because her mother stopped him from dying before he ever actually awoke. Things worked out in this situation and all is well that ends well. We have so much power as mothers. Power over ourselves and power to help shape our little ones into the respectable adults we know they will become. This woman’s mother saved her grandbaby and in the long run brought a lot of joy to a young woman who was struggling with the ultimate choice of deciding to let her child live or die.
9 Hate And Love
Notice that the person who forced this Mama to keep her baby is now her ex. She hates him for multiple reasons including keeping her baby. However, at least this Mama isn’t holding it against the child that she was born. At least this baby is loved whether she was wanted or not. I have read so many confessions from mothers who hate the children they were forced to have.
Thank goodness there are those out there who give their unplanned babies the love and care they deserve no matter what the circumstances are. Children are the innocent ones who get caught up in our messes and our drama. They didn’t ask to be born. They didn’t come to this earth to make their mother miserable. They were born because they were created by us. Whether we were forced to keep them is none of their concern. Kudos to this Mama who is still giving her daughter the love she can in the midst of the turmoil.
8 Not Ever Female Wants Motherhood
This is a good point. Not all women have to have kids. Not all women want to have kids. Not all women want to be mothers. Not all women want to carry a life inside them. Not all women want to go for 9 months without alcohol. Not all women are ready to change their lifestyle. Not all women have a maternal instinct. Not all women would make good mothers. Not all women will be good role models. Not all women have the desire to be good role model. Not all women have the patience to be a mother. Not all women have the strength to be a mother. Not all women have the money to become a mother. Not all women have dreams that allow them to become a mother. Not all women are willing to care for another human for the rest of their lives. Not all women want to be tied to the father of their child for the rest of their lives. Not all women are cut out to be mom’s. We are all unique.
7 A Grateful Mom
There are so many women out there who contemplated abortion and did not follow through with it. Many of these women know that they made the right choice. Many of these women couldn’t imagine a life without their child in it. Many women are grateful to those who stood by them and encouraged them to stay strong and carry their baby. It’s not cool that many women feel forced into their decisions by life circumstance but ultimately it is our choice whether we keep our baby or not. So thank the loved ones who stood by and let us know that they would be by our side. Having a strong support system makes all the difference in the world when it comes to parenting.
6 It Takes Two
We can’t make people act ow we want them to act. Yes, ideally when a woman has a baby the Daddy will be right there with her. Unfortunately, we live in the real world and things don’t always go as planned. If he doesn’t offer any financial assistance or help with purchasing baby supplies that is what The Office of Domestic Relations is for. There are many deadbeat Dad’s out there who would never contribute financially if they weren’t mandated to do so by a court order. If your man isn’t right with you and helping to pay bills, then there is no shame in holding him financially responsible for his child. Like this woman said, it takes two to make a baby.
5 Uncertain About Motherhood
Mommy guilt is a feeling that many of us know all too well. What if I am a bad Mom? What if I am not doing enough? What if I am doing too much? Who is the almighty mommy judge who is sitting in her robe with her gavel, sentencing us to walk through our days with the label of “BAD MOM.” Each of us parent in our own way. Sure we make mistakes, we are human. I guarantee every mommy out there though, if we mess up and do something that makes us feel like bad moms then we are sure never to make that mistake again. I would be more concerned with the dominating boyfriend who is forcing this woman into doing something she isn’t ready for.
4 Broken Dreams
That’s the thing about kids, they sure do cost a lot of money. Most things that they want and need require cold hard cash. Being a mother also takes up a lot of our time. Time that this woman was spending in college was redirected to a part time job. She gave up her dreams and goals, or at least put them on hold, to nurture and provide for her child. She doesn’t want the baby and she resents her husband for it. It doesn’t sound like this is going to end up well in the long run. If Mama’s not happy no one is happy. This mom is making her resentment very clear. Her husband needs to pick up another job so his wife can go back to college and continue fulfilling her dreams while mothering and studying. If he truly forced her then he’s the one who should pay.
3 39 Weeks Pregnant
That’s true. Being a mother is a lifelong commitment. It’s a commitment that many women don’t want. Since this woman is still pregnant it could be her hormones that are influencing these feelings of hatred towards her child. We all know that being 39 weeks pregnant can be quite uncomfortable. At this point our bodies are ready to burst. Hopefully, when her child is born she will look into its little eyes and her hatred will dissipate. When she sees those perfectly adorable 10 fingers and 10 toes she may rethink her views on being a mother. Let’s hope that’s true for this baby’s sake. If not, she may have been forced to have this baby but there is also the possibility of adoption so that the baby has the chance to fell loved and wanted.
2 Walking Out On The Baby
Once the cat’s out of the bag and people know that their loved one is pregnant it becomes a lot harder for many women to carry out an abortion. If no one else knows, no one else can force her to keep an unwanted baby. Life is hard sometimes and it sounds like this woman was screwed in more ways than one by her man, if we can even call him that.
Sounds like this guy was sticking around to make sure that his child made it into this world alive. Once things got real and he was expected to act like a father, he bounced. This happens to a lot of women. Having a baby with a man does not guarantee that he will be there for you, be faithful, or be a good Dad. Who knows why he forced her to have this baby but now that the kid is here no one wants him. It’s too bad that more of these unwanted babies aren’t being given up for adoption.
1 Forced To Be A Mom
Seventeen is a young age to become a mother. It’s also a young age to put ourselves in the situation where we need to choose life or death for our baby. At seventeen, there is so much we still have left to discover about ourselves and the world around us. Think of that magazine, Seventeen. Among the array of topics written about in this publication there is not a section set aside for parenting tips. It’s true that having a baby changes us. It changes every aspect of our lives. Imagine having to plan for childcare while still in high school. I know that it is done successfully by many and I commend these ambitious ladies for pushing through the stigmatism and trials of being a teen mom.