Walmart shoppers get a bad rap sometimes. They’re just regular, everyday folks trying to save a few bucks on toilet paper and paper clips and chocolate milk. So why have the people of Walmart become an internet sensation that no one seems to be able to get enough of? Maybe it’s because many of the shoppers roaming the aisles of America’s favorite big box store don’t seem to give AF about what anyone else thinks, and the results can be pretty darn hilarious, not to mention shocking.
The moms of Walmart are often some of the most jaw-dropping of all those who enter the store. Kids are impressionable creatures, and love nothing more than to imitate what they observe in their progenitors. Therefore, when a mama goes to the local Walmart, say, without pants, or acts in any other way that is socially unacceptable, her little darlings are learning all kinds of stuff that they probably shouldn’t be. Everyone is free to parent in their own way, as long as no harm comes to their tiny treasured tots.
We aren’t saying the moms who have been caught being a bit crazy at Walmart aren’t good parents. However, we are saying that next time you run into a Walmart for toothpaste or a candy bar or a kayak, look around. You may just observe the splendors that is a mother watching for falling prices as she rocks her crazy digs or out-there parenting styles. Please enjoy the following 15 photos of the wildest moms of Walmart.
15 Mom's Wild Ride
Being a mom is freaking exhausting. Just thinking about toting not one, but two, little darlings to the store can seem like an insurmountable feat. Luckily, by the time children reach the age of, say, seven or so, it's their turn to shoulder a little bit of the responsibility. Go ahead, moms, hop into the cart and tell little Junior it's his turn to push. Your toddler can snuggle up in there with you while your older kid sweats bullets and grunts and groans. How else is he supposed to earn those Fruit Smiles you're about to buy him?
A word of caution: the carts at Walmart were made to hold stuff like cantaloupe and Sunny D and Doritos, but the manufacturers of the wire baskets on wheels that can be found inside the doors of each and every Walmart didn't really intend for grown-ass adults to be all up inside of them. The mom pictured above gets points for creativity, but we think it's time she gets out, and, dare we say it, walks, before she bends or breaks her current mode of transportation.
14 Capitalized Punishment
Sometimes, parents like to get creative when they punish their children. It appears that the parents in the photo above have chosen to publicly shame their child in order to teach him that honesty is the best policy. No word on how long he had to wear the neon yellow homemade sign he's rocking, or if it taught him the importance of always telling the truth. Let's just hope the little guy realizes that the lesson his parents are teaching him doesn't apply the next time his mom asks him if he likes her meatloaf.
It may be a good idea for him to tell his parents the truth and let them know that defaming his character in public was a sure fire way to give him a panic attack every time he enters a Walmart for the rest of his life. And that it wasn't cool. On second thought, his parents kinda seem like jerks. Maybe he should just let it lie.
13 Assembly Required
Here's some free advice: when you realllly need a stroller, like, now, head to your local Walmart, sprawl out with your entire family on the cold, hard linoleum floor, and put your Kindergartner to work. He should have that bad boy assembled before your baby is potty trained...maybe. In the meantime, a great way to pass the hours is to people watch. Did you know some of the parents who shop at Walmart do some crazy sh**? It's true.
If other shoppers in the store need to get past you, your huge cardboard box, your stroller parts strewn all over the damn place, and your baby, who, by the way, might be about to bonk his little head, just give them a glare and tell them to go around. In reality, no one is really surprised by anything they encounter at Walmart, so they'll probably just shrug and oblige. If you get glares, it might be a good idea to remind folks that child labor is nice and free, and they should just mind their own effing business.
12 Ride Along
As previously mentioned, the carts at Walmart weren't really designed to be ridden in, in any fashion, by any human over, say, 50 pounds. We hate to break it to you, buddy, but it appears you reached the weight limit for being pushed around by your mom in a shopping cart about 8 years or so ago. The mom pictured above is a kind soul to put up with the man child currently hitching a ride as she whisks her cart around her local Walmart.
Kindness aside, anyone who has ever had the pleasure of shopping at America's favorite all-purpose store will attest to the fact that the place can get a little busy. The kid above has his head protruding way too far out into oncoming traffic. It'll only take one texting or selfie-taking stranger to send him straight to Concussionville. Once again, we'd like to suggest walking as a great alternative to allowing oneself to be wheeled into harm's way.
11 Watch For Falling Babies
One of the most well-loved inventions of all time is the baby carrier. These ingenious contraptions give parents the ability to live their lives hands free while also keeping their little ones close. Imagine being able to strap your squirming baby to your back and have both of your hands available for pushing your cart when you hit up your local Walmart.
It's important to mention that if and when baby carrying devices are not used correctly, your baby could fall out. It's a good idea to check on said baby every once in awhile to make sure everything's alright back there. Especially before heading out into the parking lot. It's made of asphalt, after all. Not to mention there are most likely a lot of cars driving around out there. Gosh, we really hope the person who snapped the above photo intervened just as soon as they got done taking it.
10 You'll Always Be My Baby
What is it with these people thinking the flimsy carts of Walmart were constructed to majorly exceed their weight limits? When a person can't fit their legs into the two little leg holes in the front of a shopping cart, it's time to get out. Walmart even makes handy, dandy, wheelchairs with baskets attached to the front of them available for people who can't walk. Go figure. Basically, the carts at Walmart are provided so that people can fill them up with sh** they don't need...not their adult children.
We know some moms love to deal with the pain of their kids growing up by denying its happening. No one can deny that the girl pictured above isn't a toddler anymore. If Mom wants to tuck her in at night and braid her hair and read her Mother Goose stories 'til the cows come home, so be it. But, people of Walmart, leaving the freaking shopping carts alone! What did they ever do to you?
9 Cozy Conveyer Belt
No matter how much a mom tries to avoid it, the time will come when her child passes out in the light bulb aisle at Walmart, foiling her hopes of a peaceful nap time at home. It's a tragic occurrence, but when you need the basic necessities, sometimes, sacrificing the glorious time of day that is nap time for the greater good is unavoidable. Luckily for moms with sleepy tykes, the conveyer belts at Walmart make great beds. They move slowly, rocking your sweet babe just like a gentle breeze. Additionally, they make a soft, humming noises as they move, soothing your sleepy child into submission.
Heck, it might be a good idea to head to a Walmart check-out line next time your toddler refuses to hit the sack midday. Warning: we can't promise the person at the cash register won't give you a stare down that can only mean they hate you and your kid's stinking guts. Why? Probably because you are being super obnoxious, and using an apparatus made for transporting celery and cellophane to house your slumbering sweetie.
8 Pants On The Ground
We all know kids like to take their clothing off at the worst of times. This bad habit, that many little ones struggle with, can easily embarrass a parent who's just trying to get a good deal on household items at Walmart when her tot decides to lose his knickers. Not sure if the sweet child pictured above is about to empty his bladder or is just giving his nether regions some fresh air.
All we know is that the mom in the above photo is in for a surprise when she finally stops being so damn concerned with the toilet paper she's examining. It's no secret that kids can get into mischief pretty quickly, even if mom's back is only turned for a millisecond. The moral of the above photo? Never turn your back on a child when at Walmart. In a nutshell, it's a place that's known for causing people to do things they absolutely shouldn't.
7 Teen Liar
Nice. Another mom went for the "embarrass the hell out of my child by making her wear a homemade sign while we peruse the aisles of Walmart" punishment. We don't know the backstory of the above photo, but we do know that, according to sign the teen is wearing, she lies to her parents, bullies her siblings, disrespects her teachers, is 16 and knows it all. Sounds like she's pretty much like every other 16-year-old girl on the planet. Sure, they aren't always the most pleasant people to be around, but does this mean they deserve to be humiliated?
While we are in no way condoning lying, bullying or disrespectful behavior, however, forcing an adolescent who is already convinced that everyone is always looking at her, and scrutinizing her every move, to walk around in public while wearing a very accusatory poster board might be considered bullying by some, and disrespecting a child by others. Let's leave it at this: kids often learn best by example, and, in many cases, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
6 One Piece For The Win
The one piece is an article of clothing that not many can pull off--mom or not. Those who don them run a serious risk of sporting a wedgie, or, worse, something named after a two-humped animal that people ride in the desert. When carrying a tot on your hip, it's often hard to get any sort of clothing to behave as it's supposed to. The mama pictured above is one brave woman. We applaud her confidence, but are a little worried that the holes in her pants going all the way up to her bum may cause her to get a bit of a chill if she spends too much more time in the frozen foods section.
Many moms don't have the time to put too much though into what they're wearing. Comfort, and the ability to move easily, are usually the two most important components in a mom's choice of apparel. Therefore, although the above getup is questionable in nature, and the mother runs the risk of being featured on the next episode of TLC's What Not To Wear, she looks to be comfortable and able to move, so, in the end, we can't really fault her outfit choice.
5 Break Time
Oh, dear. The woman above has gone ahead and given in to every single Walmart stereotype. She's prego. She's smoking. She's wearing slippers. We aren't sure if she's waiting for a ride, waiting for someone to come rip her cig out of her hand and give her a lecture or waiting to go into labor. Whatever she's up to, she's putting her baby in danger by exposing it to the harsh chemicals found in cigarettes.
This is one wild mom whose behavior cannot be condoned. Many women smoke during pregnancy because they lack the knowledge that doing so can do major harm to their unborn babies. The best way to ensure less and less babies fall victim to smoking mothers-to-be is to tell the world: DON'T SMOKE WHILE EXPECTING. Ever. Especially not at Walmart. Why? Cause other wild parents are watching, and it's important not to perpetuate dangerous behaviors. We hope this woman got the help and advice she needed before too much harm was done to her baby-to-be.
4 I'll Never Let Go
Shopping at Walmart can get exhausting. Quickly. The crowds, the noise, the never ending shelves and shelves and shelves of stuff, stuff and more stuff. It's enough to make even the most energetic shopper feel the urge to take a nap. When your mom is comfortably seated in a riding shopping cart with only enough space for one rider, your options become limited.
You can choose to walk (ya right), nestle yourself into your mama's lap (which she might not love when you're 7), or, you can do the most logical thing and hold on for dear life to the metal bars located at the bottom of mom's moving chair as she cruises around the store. The boy pictured above may look comfortable, but it's important for anyone considering trying out his chosen mode of transportation to remember that he's basically being dragged through a bajillion germs-or-so per second. In short, those who like to be clean-ish might not want to copy the little guy above.
3 Let's Take A Shelfie
Not sure exactly what on Earth is going on in the photo above. It's possible the child who can only be identified by his little feet peeking out from a really high shelf, climbed up there on his own, and now his parents are attempting to help him get back down. A few other possibilities? One, he's being used by his mom and dad as a means to procure an out-of-reach product. Two, he is spying on the people one aisle over, who owe his mom and dad money for drugs, or the neighborhood barbeque they attended last week without bringing the sour cream and onion chips they were assigned to bring.
Another possibility? Those feet belong to a very realistic doll the parents are purchasing to use as a funny Halloween prank. Whatever is going on, one thing is certain: it looks like everyone is having a wild, crazy good time.
2 Little Jokester
Isn't it just so hilarious when little kids make funny faces while participating in activities that could end their lives in a few seconds flat? Nope. Actually, it's the opposite of hilarious. It's disturbing and horrific and...the person taking this picture needs to put the camera down and scurry over to remove the plastic bag from that kid's head before he kicks the bucket. It doesn't look like his mom is planning to do anything about the situation anytime soon. She's got chips to buy, after all.
All we can say is, however the little guy above got his hands on the death machine he's currently playing with, the fact that he was able to get it all the way over his head without his mom being the wiser is as shocking as it is troubling. We know shopping at Walmart is hard work, but, if you bring your kids along, please don't allow them to participate in behaviors that can kill them dead. Is that too much to ask?
1 Giving Back
Awe. It's sweet when customers are appreciative and loyal enough to give back to the store they love to frequent. The mom and her little one pictured above have decided to take it upon themselves to fertilize Walmart's parking lot foliage. Isn't it cute how the baby in the abandoned cart, who, by the way, could totally fall out or roll away at any moment, is observing the whole thing, learning what service is all about?
As a matter of fact, while nothing about the above photo screams parent of the year, the only parents who are free to judge are those who have never, ever made a parenting mistake of their own. The truth is, every mom out there knows the scenario pictured above far too well. It's rough being a mother, and things are rarely anything but wild in the parenting department, whether one is at Walmart, the playground, or in their own home. Let's leave it at this: the wild moms of Walmart are doing the best they can, just like the rest of us.