In North America, amusement parks, theme parks, and similar attractions are one of everybody's favorite pastimes. This is especially true for kids, who, for the most part, all want to jump on a ride, eat fair food, and win prizes while dragging their parents through the crowds. This is why Disney Land, Disney World, Lego Land, Six Flags, The PNE, and the like are so unbelievably popular.
But the truth is, not every amusement park or theme park attraction is built for kids. In fact, one might be taken aback to know that there are a handful of these places that are wholly unsuitable for children. Some of them don't take kids into account, while others are designed for adults and adults only.
This list will delve into some of the most notable amusement parks, theme parks, and large attractions that kids probably shouldn't be going to for a variety of reasons; some far less obvious than others. In order to do this, we'll have to trek across the globe, as many of the entries to follow are outside of North America in exotic and frigid locations, alike. Without further ado, here are 20 amusement parks that are not suitable for kids.
20 France's Grown-Up Grape Juice Theme Park
For people looking to get to a theme park without yelling children, look no further than France's La Cité du Vin, which translates to "the city of wine." It's a theme park completely devoted to wine. Of course, this means that children are not allowed to be there and probably shouldn't be, to begin with. This is because adults can partake in a number of exclusive wine experiences such as tastings, classes, screenings, and the like. The attraction is located in Bordeaux, which is one of France's most famous wine-making regions. Unfortunately, there are no rides here because copious wine drinking and rollercoasters don't tend to make the best bedfellows.
19 Vegas' Construction Park
Although Vegas does have many theme-park attractions for kids, Dig This isn't really designed with them in mind. There are sections of the park that are focused on kids, but the vast majority would just be too troublesome for children. This is because the park is designed for people to play around with heavy pieces of construction equipment such as bulldozers and excavators. Everyone's sandbox dreams can come true at this Las Vegas attraction. In some respects, it's a good idea. But in others, it's a bit silly. Mostly, it's unsuitable for young children who are not responsible enough to operate these behemoths. Then again, neither are most adults...
18 Spain's Adult Water Park And Hotel
Spain's BH Mallorca is exclusively an adult attraction. Children are not allowed to attend, so nobody should try. But this is for the best since it's really an adult playground for attractive people to gather together, have liquid happiness and have some fun. The hotel and waterpark is the world's first adult water park with 9 huge slides, a wave pool, and ginormous jacuzzis. It opened in 2015 and is an off-shoot of their Ibiza resort, which is also ill-advisable to bring children too. BH Mallorca attracts world-class DJs and good-looking people from all around the world. Essentially, it's one big party.
17 Germany's Kuchlbauer's Bierwelt
Any beer garden is unsuitable for kids to attend. But this is especially true of Kuchlbauer’s Bierwelt. This beer garden, museum, and the brewery is in the heart of Bavaria and is pretty darn cool for those who adore beer. The space itself is pretty kitschy as it includes a ton of gnomes and a massive collection of beer glasses. This place is a beer lover's dream. It also has a 115-foot observation tower that looks like something out of a child's most imaginative fantasy. However, this place is far from an acceptable for kids to go to. Instead, adults can drink and learn in a space that is free from nagging kids who shouldn't get their hands on Bavaria's treats.
16 South Korea's Love Land
South Korea is full of attractions that most North Americans would find odd and very creative. Among them is Love Land, which is situated on the tropical island of Jeju. The place is scenic, to say the least. It's lush and full of wondrous natural sights. That's one of the reasons why so many couples come to the place every year. Although there are some suitable attractions for kids, most of it is an adult wonderland, to say the least. The unusual artwork and hands-on exhibits are built for people exploring their romantic relationships. This is why the majority of the park is only suitable for people over the age of 18.
15 Atlanta's Haunted House Park
There are many haunted houses that are built with kids in mind. Even some mature children are welcome to go into some of the most frightening ones at Disney World or at other amusement parks. But the Chambers park in Atlanta is truly adults-only. The attraction is just way too much for kids. It really takes haunted houses to the next level and contains things that no child should see until they are of age. The Chambers comes from genre fans and local artists Luke Godfrey and Rene Arriagada, who create new stores and layouts for the space on the regular. The attraction is incredibly successful and brings in fans of the spooky genre from all over the world. It's just not a place one wants to take children.
14 Ohio's Cedar Point
Cedar Point attracts children every day. Therefore, it's not a place that only adults can go. However, it is tailored for older children and adults. This is because of the rides themselves, which are not suitable for kids. Seriously, these rides are very impressive and would cause anyone to second-guess getting on them. They are far too high, fast, and twisty for most kids. Cedar Point has 17 roller coasters and a ton of amenities aimed at adults as the organizers know that the majority of people coming here are of age. There are lots of places for adults to drink and eat BBQ while at the park, and there's even a hotel to stay at.
13 Orlando's Disney Springs
While it's true that most of the Disney Parks make sure that adults can have fun at the same time as their kids, this isn't always true. Disney is really more concerned with making kids want to come to their parks and spend their parents' money. But Orlando's Disney Springs is designed to be an adult playground. It was once Pleasure Island, and then "The Landing," but was changed to Disney Springs in recent years. It's become a place where adults can go have a quiet (or very loud) drink, shop, and dance the night away. This is why it's not entirely suitable for kids. Sure, they can go to Disney Springs, but will they actually enjoy it?
12 Missouri's Silver Dollar City
Silver Dollar City, located in Branson, Missouri, isn't totally unsuitable for kids. After all, it is a theme park that has many of the things that young kids absolutely love. But, without a doubt, it's tailored more for adults than anyone else. This is because the theme park is more like an old-timey artisan community with live music venues, fairgrounds, Southern food courts, and cooking classes. The place does have some rollercoasters, but most of the rides are only suitable for older kids and adults. One could take their kids here but they would find themselves held back by them. Therefore, this place isn't suitable for them.
11 Colorado's Glenwood Caverns
Colorado's Glenwood Caverns is a theme park that's designed for a specific age group that's not young kids. That's because they won't find a bunch of cuddly cartoon characters, fried food, or even kiddie rides for them to have fun on. This mountaintop park is better for older kids and adults who won't get squeamish by a rollercoaster perched on the edge of a cliff, a zip line over a valley, a mountain tram, or an attraction that plunges riders 110 feet into Iron Mountain. Sure, kids can tour the caverns, but the theme park really isn't suitable for them as there isn't anything else for them to take part in. Instead, adults can eat grown-up food and ride thrilling rollercoasters sure to make them holler.
10 Lithuania's ISGYVENINO Drama
All kids dream of what life would have been like living in a USSR bunker and being yelled out by soldiers and barked at by military dogs, right? No. Probably not. That's only one of the reasons why this Soviet Bunker Park is unsuitable for kids. Lithuania either has an odd idea of what fun is or they love giving people very different experiences. At this amusement park, actual former members of the Soviet army work underground and make all of the attendees live for the day as USSR citizens. This means wearing a gas mask, getting interrogated by former KGB agents, and generally looking very unhappy. What fun for kids!
9 The U.K.'s Human Catapult
Middlemoor Water Park in England may have many attractions suitable for kids, but the Human Catapult Ride is certainly not one of them. In fact, it may not even be suitable for adults since many accidents have happened when on this "ride." This shouldn't take anyone aback, since riders are hooked into a massive medieval-style catapult and flung through the air at 60 miles per hours until a net about 75 feet away. Yes, this is an actual ride at an actual amusement park. If adults aren't detoured by the sheer lunacy of this attraction, they should almost certainly keep their kids as far away from it as humanly possible. This is purely unsuitable for them.
8 England's Charles Dickens World
England is also home to an entire theme park dedicated to famed author Charles Dickens. The entire park is a recreation of Victorian England and pays tribute to many of Dickens's classics, with an emphasis on "A Christmas Carol." One could go to the haunted house in there, ride a log flume through a rat-filled sewer or even deal with pick-pocketers who try to make the entire attraction as authentic as possible. The place is even lit by gas lamps that give the park an authentic, and totally yucky, smell. Although this could be interesting to some adults, it's just not the place where kids want to go. Therefore, we should call a spade "a spade" and say that this one isn't suitable for the younglings.
7 New Zealand's Hobbiton
Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit fans absolutely adore New Zealand's recreation of Hobbiton (AKA "The Shire") from the movies. In fact, anyone who has a thing for fantasy, architecture, or just taking cute pictures will love this attraction. The movies were all shot in this absurdly beautiful country, and remain very special to its people. Recreating Tolkien's vision in a physical space that should last all of the time is a great way to honor it. But the attraction really isn't suited for kids. Families are more than welcome, but young kids probably won't have a great time as the place is really for site-seeing, eating, and drinking. Then again, young kids won't have such a hard time fitting into all the wee Hobbit doors.
6 England's Thorpe Park
Yet again, England has created a theme park that has adults in mind more so than children. The Thorpe Theme Park is located in Surrey and is mostly perfect for adults who enjoy going on some truly impressive rides that would push any kid away. The attractions include a large water ride, and a ton of nerve-testing rollercoasters like the Colossus, Nemesis Inferno, Stealth, Saw - The Ride, The Swarm, And Derren Brown's Ghost Train. As you can see from all the names, this isn't really a kid-friendly place. Sure, there's an Angry Birds-themed area, but the rest of the park is really ideal for adults only.
5 England's Go Ape
Older kids may have a great time as Go Ape, but younger kids really aren't supposed to be partaking in too many activities of this English theme park. That's because Go Ape is full of attractions far above the tree-line and through the rocky and unforgiving wilderness. There are 29 locations of Go Ape in England, each offers a unique forest experience that Tarzan would absolutely adore. One can climb across beams and wires suspended far into the air. It's an adult jungle gym of epic proportions. There are some kid-friendly areas, but, for the most part, the place is really only suitable for adults.
4 Denmark's Superkilen
Denmark's Superkilen, located in København, is the very definition of an adult playground. It's an area filled with contemporary art that only a mature mind can enjoy as well as some pretty impressive areas for advanced sporting activities such as biking and skateboarding. The park consists of several pavilions and markers including The Red Square, The Black Market, and a green park, as well as a massive cycling track. People can shop and eat all they want while others can play around on equipment and terrain that most kids should avoid altogether. This architectural wonder may not be entirely unsuitable for kids, but most would recommend that kids be kept to a minimum here. This is where the adults get to play.
3 Norway's Megazone
Laser tag isn't exactly unsuitable for most kids. Of course, one has to be of a certain age and height to partake, but it's fairly okay for kids unless parents want to keep them away from such activities. However, the Megazone in Norway is entirely a different story. This place is a highly advanced laser tag arenas as well as an obstacle course. The place is geared toward adult players as well as corporate team-building events. It's also a great place for bull-riding, battle-play, sumo wrestling, Q-tip battles, and paintball with rubber bullets. Yes, this place is way too much for young kids. In fact, one could call it completely unsuitable for them.
2 Abu Dhabi's Ferrari World
For many reasons, Abu Dhabi isn't a great city for children, but it does contain many adults geared toward them. However, F1 themed Ferrari World is better for adults. This is because it contains many hair-raising moments with state-of-the-art racing simulations that make one feel like they are being launched into the sky as they go about 95km/h. This stuff can be quite a bit much for young kids, especially ones who don't have an appreciation for cars. Ferrari World is also home to the world's fastest rollercoaster. The Spider reaches an acceleration of 240km/h in under five seconds as it launches its guests 52 meters into the sky. Adrenaline junkies will love this place; children will not.
1 Orlando's Epcot Center
Walt Disney World theme parks are primarily geared toward kids, even though most remain adult friendly. But one of the big exceptions is Orlando's Epcot Center. This is because it's almost entirely focused on adults who'd love to eat and drink their way around the world. The pavilion is also a great place for shopping and other adult experiences that children aren't going to enjoy at all. This isn't a place where Mickey Mouse rides the teacups. This is a place where mom and dad get to relax a little after a long day at the park. Therefore, we deem the Epcot Centre pretty unsuitable for kids as they are bound to be bored.