Celebrity moms make motherhood look absurdly glamorous. It starts with the perfect little baby bumps, continues with the chic and trendy maternity style, and culminates with model gorgeous babies. Celebrity families almost always look sickeningly sweet and happy, and the moms are at the center of it all. But if there's a more mundane side to being a Hollywood mom (and you know there is), we rarely get to see it.
Realistically, it's just not possible that every famous woman you've ever seen smiling seductively from the cover of a fashion magazine or starring in your favorite TV show has birthed a perfect little angel baby. In reality, celebrity moms must be going through the same exact things that all the rest of us are— the stress, the sleep deprivation, and the struggle to adjust to a life that now revolves around a child. They don't often talk about it, however, so we're left to guess what's going on behind closed doors. If they'd share some of that information with the rest of us, perhaps it would help some women feel better about not living up to the ridiculously high standard of the modern mom.
Here are 20 questions we'd totally love to get some answers to from celebrity moms.
20 What's With The Crazy Baby Names?
Kim Kardashian and Kanye West may be the reigning king and queen of oddball baby names with their kids North and Saint, but celebrities picking unusual monikers for their offspring is nothing new. Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin made a splash when they named their daughter Apple, and again when they followed it up with the equally eyebrow raising Moses. Way back in the 60's, musician Frank Zappa and his wife were coming up with baby names like Dweezil and Moon Unit. So I just have to know, what gives? Are the whacky names all about the headlines they'll inevitably grab? I'm pretty sure most celebrity kids are going to have to grow up with a lot of unwanted attention, and their one of a kind names seem like they'll only make them stand out even more.
19 How Did You Snap Back So Fast?
Former Victoria's Secret Angel and supermodel Doutzen Kroes, seen here, is one of many famous mamas who gave birth and then were somehow ready to hit the catwalk or the red carpet what seemed like 6 seconds later. In reality, it may have taken a few weeks, but still. Even if you take into consideration that a lot of celebrity moms are in great shape before they give birth, it still doesn't really explain how they come out of pregnancy so unscathed. Where are the stretch marks? Why aren't their boobs saggy and two different sizes? Us regular moms have to deal with those kind of postpartum body issues, and it just doesn't seem fair that so many famous moms don't. If there's a secret to their success, they need to share it with the rest of us ASAP.
18 Did You Have Work Done?
Speaking of the secret to getting back in shape after birth, I can't help but wonder if it doesn't involve a little plastic surgery for some moms. Supermodel Cindy Crawford is now in her 50's and has two incredibly good looking teenagers, and yet she still looks as amazing as she did 20 or 30 years ago. Her body is still slim and toned and her face is unlined and gorgeous. Are her genes really so amazing that she's been able to stop time and defy gravity, or did she get a little professional help somewhere along the way? If she did have some work done, I think a lot of people are going to be wanting that doctor's number and price list because he or she is clearly worth the money.
17 Do You Ever Wish You Could Let It All Hang Out?
If there was an official mom uniform, it would most definitely involve leggings and a messy topknot. And yet it's incredibly rare that we see a celebrity mom photographed that way, even though many of them get followed by paparazzi pretty much everywhere they go. It must be tough to feel like you can't leave the house looking ready carpet ready, and I bet more than a few Hollywood moms wish they could run to their grocery store in their pajamas just like the rest of us. But of course, we don't have to worry about our bed head look ending up on the cover of a magazine with a snarky headline. There are many things I envy about some celebrity mom's lifestyle, but constantly needing to dress to impress isn't one of them.
16 Are The Rumors True?
When a famous actress or singer gets pregnant, it typically sparks a flurry of excitement in their fans. There's often an insatiable desire for details about the big event, and sometimes the rumor mill goes into overdrive. Sometimes there are rumblings that a mama to be used fertility treatments to get pregnant, or whispers that one decided to deliver via C-section simply to avoid vaginal tearing. We occasionally hear rumors that some famous ladies turned to a surrogate to have their kids to avoid ruining their famous figures, or faked a pregnancy altogether (I for one believe that Beyonce definitely did give birth to Blue Ivy). While it's technically no one's business how someone chooses to start or expand their family, it would definitely be intriguing to get a chance to separate the fact from fiction.
15 Where Do You Score All Those Amazing Baby Clothes?
Who would have even known that they made fur coats and chokers for kids if we didn't have Kim Kardashian's Instagram pics of North West to educate us? North's wardrobe alone is probably worth more than some people's houses, and you know Kim didn't get it at Target or order it off Amazon. We're talking hand-made, one of a kind pieces from amazing designers like Balmain, Stella McCartney, and Giuseppe Zanotti. I'm pretty sure Kim didn't charge all those incredible little outfits and their fabulous matching accessories to her American Express card, so how about passing along some freebies to the rest of us? Or at the very least, how about letting us know where we can score some amazing knockoffs that don't require taking out a second mortgage to pay for?
14 Does Your Famous Baby Daddy Help Out?
The average moms struggle to balance taking care of their children, keeping their household running, working, and finding a little time for themselves. Our lives are a lot easier if we have a husband or partner who steps up not only with their daddy duties but also with taking care of chores around the house. I can't help but wonder if celebrity moms are able to rely on their husband in the same way. Anna Faris stars in her own sitcom (aptly named Mom), and takes care of her little boy Jack. Hubby Chris Pratt seems to have an even more demanding career, jetting around the world to film blockbuster movies like Guardians of the Galaxy and Jurassic World. When the shoots wrap up, however, is Chris really wiping their son's nose and preparing kid sized sandwiches? I for one would love to know.
13 How Did You Keep Your Baby News Under Wraps?
While some celebrity moms are more than happy to share their baby news and let their new families be photographed for magazine covers (usually for an enormous payday), others are much more private. Eva Mendes and Ryan Gosling just may be the best in the business at keeping their bundles of joys under wraps. Before giving birth to their first daughter, Mendes dropped largely out of sight, and bump photos were few and extremely far between. With paparazzi constantly on the prowl and pretty much every person you meet equipped with a phone camera these days, it's kind of amazing that Mendes and Gosling's baby joy wasn't outed much earlier. It makes me wonder if Mendes actually spent the majority of her pregnancy refusing to leave the house, because it hardly seems possible to keep such a secret between two huge stars.
12 How Bad Are You Spoiling Your Kid?
We all feel the urge to spoil our kids sometimes. But because most of us don't have millions of dollars in the bank, spoiling means letting them have an extra cookie or snagging a toy on a grocery run at Target. When money is no object, however, I can only imagine that spoiling exists on a whole other level. I've seen celebrity babies carrying around purses that cost as much as some people's rent, and rocking wardrobes that could fund a few semesters of college. It may be cute and adorable, but what happens if your kid doesn't follow in your famous footsteps? What if they can't afford to sustain the fabulous lifestyle you've given them once they're an adult out on their own? Money may be fun, but it certainly can come with its own set of problems.
11 How Do You Deal With The Mom Shaming?
Mom shaming is hard enough when you're a regular person. There's always someone ready and willing to criticize your choices and tell you what you're doing wrong, despite the fact that you neither asked for nor appreciate their opinion. When you're a celebrity, the mom shaming multiplies by a few million. Just ask Chrissy Teigen, who preemptively silenced her haters by telling them not to bother pointing out that baby Luna's diaper is dirty in this picture (as evidenced by the blue line), because as she put it "it's never not blue." I would love to know how someone like Teigen maintains their sense of humor in a situation where tons of random strangers feel the need to criticize their parenting, because I am definitely way too thin-skinned to handle it.
10 How Much Help Do You Really Have?
Most moms are lucky if they can line up a sitter for a date night once a month or so, and even luckier if they can manage to sneak out of the house for a hair appointment once or twice a year. Even those moms who do have nannies to help out while they work come home from a long day at the office only to be confronted by kids who need bathing and piles of laundry that need washing. Not too many families can afford to outsource all their chores, but the rich and famous can. Something tells me that there are lots of celebrities who haven't sorted the dirty clothes pile in years, thanks to their battalion of household help. Some celebrity families have multiple nannies and night nurses, plus maids, cooks, and drivers. And of course, don't forget the hair and make up team.
9 Do You Really Trust Your Nanny?
There's two layers of trust involved when a celebrity mom hires a nanny: first that she'll care for and protect the kids like they're her own flesh and blood, and secondly, that she'll keep her hands off the famous husband. This second part really shouldn't be a concern, and yet if you look around Hollywood, it's pretty clear that it is. Rumors abound about families broken up by a philandering husband and a willing nanny. Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck allegedly split after his dalliance with the kid's caretaker, and former Spice Girl Mel B divorced her husband after accusing him of getting their nanny pregnant. With so many tawdry examples out there, I'm sure more than a few celebrity moms are watching their nannies and their husbands like a hawk.
8 What Celeb Kids Do You Dread Playdates With?
There's no doubt that some celebrity kids must be incredibly spoiled brats. Even regular parents sometimes raise bratty kids, of course, but I have to assume that your odds of raising a problem child go up a bit when they're used to having only the finest things in life. I would love for just one celebrity mom to fill us in on whose kids are the absolute worst. Maybe they boss all the other kids around because they're used to having a staff at their beck and call. Maybe they refuse to eat macaroni and cheese unless it's infused with truffle oil. Maybe they scream bloody murder if another kid tries to hop into their miniature Lamborghini. We definitely need the details on which celebrity kids need a major time-out.
7 Is Jet-Setting With A Baby Glamorous Or Miserable?
Celebs and their kids are often photographed going on glamorous vacations all over the world, whether they're skiing in Aspen, yachting around the Mediterranean, or blowing tons of cash in the shops in Paris. These moms and their little ones are always looking polished and relaxed, and I suppose travel is definitely easier when everything is first class and 5 star. But let's be real— kids are going to be kids, no matter how classy the vacation destination is. Those glossy paparazzi photos are showing us the enviable highlights, but I bet there's much more to the story— because not even the richest parent alive can buy a fix for jet-lag induced toddler tantrums or figure out how to please a sulky teenager who'd rather be at home with their friends.
6 Is It Worth It When Your Kids Have To Deal With Fame, Too?
There are some celebrity kids who seem to get just as much ink in gossip magazines as their famous parents do— think any of the Jolie-Pitt siblings, Suri Cruise, and the late Michael Jackson's kids. As a parent, it must be gut-wrenching knowing that your kids come under an intense level of scrutiny because of what you choose to do for a living. Some parents, like Jennifer Garner and Halle Berry, have crusaded to make it harder for the paparazzi to photograph their kids. Others, however, have simply embraced the public adoration of their little ones and regularly provide pictures and updates. While I'm sure every parent is doing what they think is best for their child, it's hard not to wonder how it will all turn out when these little ones grow up and start wanting more privacy.
5 Are Your Kids Going To Get Into Show Business?
Some Hollywood moms and dads have no qualms about letting their kids get into the family business. Director Judd Apatow and his actress wife Leslie Mann have let their daughters Maude and Iris co-star in their films Knocked Up and This is 40, for example. Other stars say there is absolutely no way they'll let their children act. But some celebrity kids are so cute and so intriguing that they've built up their own fan bases independent of their parents, and fans would probably pay good money to see them tackle their own projects. If acting has brought you fame and success, it's hard to see how you'd be able to convince your kid to get a regular 9-to-5 job if they're not inclined to do so.
4 Do You Feel Weird That They Can't Watch Most Of Your Movies?
Plenty of actors and actresses have taken on roles that call for nudity. It may earn a film an R-rating, but for the most part it's really not all that scandalous these days. Mom of three Kate Winslet, for example, has appeared in the buff in several of her films, including Titanic. While celebrities who went nude for roles might have felt it was the right artistic choice at the time for whatever project they were working on, I wonder how they feel about it when their kids get a little older and want to see their mom's films. That's got to be an awkward conversation, and I suspect most moms would end up either banning their own DVDs or keeping their finger on the fast forward button at all times during a showing.
3 Do Your Kids Even Care That You're Famous?
When kids are little, they tend to worship the ground their parents walk on. Something as simple as whipping up a box of macaroni and cheese makes mom a goddess in the kitchen, and dad a hero for having the strength for endless piggy-back rides. But before you know it, kids grow out of that phase and suddenly mom and dad are embarrassing dorks who totally cramp their style. Is it any different if you're a celebrity mom? Probably not. Drew Barrymore's daughter seen above clearly didn't care that her mom is one of Hollywood's most accomplished actresses when she had a meltdown at Disneyland. She may have some Golden Globe and Screen Actors Guild awards under her belt, but none of that impresses a kid who suddenly thinks you're the worst. Celebrities: sometimes they really are just like us.
2 How Do You Keep Your Kids Down To Earth?
Star couple Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis have famously said that they as mommy and daddy are rich, but their kids are poor. Clearly what they mean is that they want their kids to realize that their parents worked hard for their wealth, and that they should do the same some day rather than developing a sense of entitlement. While it's a good idea in theory, I have to wonder if a child who's growing up in a massive mansion and riding around in luxury cars is ever going to feel like they're not loaded. We've seen plenty of celebrity kids fail to carve out their own careers and instead just continue to live in their famous family's shadow (ahem, Rob Kardashian), so clearly keeping your kid grounded in Hollywood isn't easy.
1 Will You Adopt Me?
I realize that I'm a grown up (allegedly), but what I wouldn't give to be a Hollywood kid for even one day. Seriously, the clothes, the cash, the houses, and the vacations... It's the stuff dreams are made of. I'm sure Blue Ivy is an amazing kid, but having been born into the lap of luxury, I doubt she appreciates her mega rich lifestyle half as much as I would if Beyonce would just adopt me even for one day. After all, when the Queen Bee is your mom, that makes you a princess. I may not look nearly as cute as Blue does in a designer dress worth thousands, but I could absolutely promise not to spill my juice box on it or get it covered in goldfish cracker crumbs!