Bernadette Rostenkowski Wolowitz is TV's favorite microbiologist. She may be tiny with a high-pitched voice, but this little lady is one smart cookie. Not only is she a heavy hitter in her field of work, but she also wears the pants in her own family. If it's not Bernadette's way, it's probably not happening (to Howard's dismay). And while some women may see Bernadette's bulldog attitude as being too aggressive at times, I think it really rounds out the girls on The Big Bang Theory. There are no weak females in this show!
As many Big Bang Theory fans know, Bernadette and Howard lasting seemed like a long-shot when they started dating, but their love for each other overcame many obstacles, and the two become engaged, got married, moved into the suburbs, and even had two babies together. These two have all their ducks in a row in comparison to some of the other characters on The Big Bang Theory.
Nevertheless, when it comes to Bernadette's parenting style, some viewers can't help but notice she's a tad aloof. While every mother is entitled to her own parenting style and outlook on motherhood, Bernadette never really wanted to be a mother to begin with, which, sadly, seems to translate to her time with her kids.
Understandably, the writers over on Big Bang noted fans would never see Halley or Neil's (aka Michale's) face as a silent shoutout to Howard's late mother (whom we never saw either). Nevertheless, Bernie seems to favor just about everything else over her children. There's no doubt Bernadette and Howard are great parents who provide for their children, but these 20 moments don't look too great for Bernadette in terms of motherhood.
20 When She Found Out She Was Pregnant The First Time
Hardcore fans may remember Bernadette trying to tell Howard she was pregnant the first time around. She and Howard wanted to go for a dip in their Jacuzzi when they ended up rescuing a rabbit instead. Amid all the commotion, Bernie never had the chance to do it, nor did she seem too thrilled with the fact. She eventually did tell her husband, and truth be told, her reaction wasn't really what fans were expecting. She was more concerned than excited. In her own words, "Not every girl dreams about being a mom. Sometimes you think you’re never going to have kids, and one day you wake up and you’re pregnant."
19 Choosing Her Job Over Halley
Don't get me wrong — I truly believe women can do (and have) it all. We can work while also having kids and taking care of our families. There is no limit to what we can achieve! Nevertheless, while she was pregnant with both Halley and Michael, she seemed to be more worried about her job than the fact that she was having a baby. With her kind of position of power at work, Bernadette should have known her job was secure regardless of a child. Instead, though, she almost blamed her unborn child for halting her ongoing success at work. It kind of makes fans wonder if she went back to work early just to get away from baby Halley.
18 Seemingly Always Having Raj Or Stuart Take On Parenting Duties
I understand the writers at Big Bang Theory wanted fans to see that women can, in fact, be mothers and wives while also having thriving jobs, but I almost feel like they overdid it when it comes to Raj and Stuart. Understandably so, when Bernadette was pregnant with baby number one, they had Stuart living with them and Raj being jealous of Stuart's involvement, which made him step up more. While I think the friendship these four have is beautiful, as a new mom, I think most women would want those small moments with their husband. The last thing I would want to do is nest with three men taking over the job for me.
17 Needing A Reason To Be Excited For Baby Number Two
In real life, the actress who plays Bernadette (Mellissa Rauch) was not pregnant when Halley was born, but she did find herself pregnant for the first time later, which is why writers had to write in a second baby. As was the case with Halley, Bernie wasn't too pleased with the thought of a second baby. Howard seemed equally stressed, especially since he was already threatened by his wife's success — he wasn't sure how to provide for a family of four! Nevertheless, the two came together and convinced each other this was a good idea and that the baby was coming whether they liked it or not. Selfishly, Bernadette didn't want to go through pregnancy again so she begged Penny to get pregnant "with her," so she didn't have to go through it alone.
16 Going Out While Breastfeeding (And Ignoring Amy's Advice)
After Halley was born, Bernadette realized how much she loved being a mom. She adored baby Halley and, surprisingly, found it hard to go back to work when the time came. Eventually, our favorite Big Bang ladies crew went out for drinks and Bernadette indulged in a hoppy beverage. Knowing how it looked, she immediately told Amy and Penny not to judge her for drinking while breastfeeding; she read somewhere that the yeast in beer could actually help with breastmilk production. Quick with a response, Amy tried debunking that rumor, but Bernie didn't want to hear it. She was drinking a cold one, and that was that.
Women who are breastfeeding can probably have a few drinks as long as they space out the feedings accordingly, but we're not sure how much of that Bernie actually took into consideration.
15 Eating Takeout Seemingly Every Night
Do our favorites on The Big Bang Theory EVER eat anything green or healthy? How do these seven keep their shape! Most men and women eat whatever they want — not thinking twice about it; but once kids come, their priorities switch. They want to change their lifestyle so that their children duplicate healthy habits. Now, the show doesn't show us what Bernie and Howard cook at home too often, but they do show them chowing down on takeout food practically every night. To each their own, but who knows what's actually in all that takeout food, which is then transferred into Bernie's breastmilk. Perhaps Michale and Halley are fussier than normal because they're not thrilled with the nutrients their mother is giving them?
14 Not Being Excited About The Gender
Let's be honest, we all knew Bernadette wasn't a fan of her pregnancies — nor was she a fan of getting pregnant, in general. Don't we all remember that one episode where Bernadette tells her father she's not pregnant because Howard didn't want kids, but in reality, it was her? Nevertheless, when she found out she was having a boy the second time around, she wasn't thrilled considering she "already has one of those" (meaning Howard). Truth be told, even if she was having another girl, I have the feeling that she wouldn't have been excited either because she "already has one of those" too.
Moms may prefer one gender over the other, but I don't think many get as down in the dumps about it as Bernadette.
13 Gender Stereotyping
Gender stereotyping may have been normal beyond the '90s, but it's pretty much being kicked to the curb these days. While every parent has the right to dress their child in any clothes or colors they like, Bernie seemed pretty against Michael wearing any of Halley's clothes. They're just colors, right?
Pregnant with baby number two, Bernie was going through all of Halley's old clothes, telling Raj she had to toss it all away since Michael couldn't be seen wearing any "girl" clothes. Raj, being the amazing man he is, decided to kind of reinvent the clothes so that Bernie would be happy with them.
12 Only Wanting To Focus On Work While Pregnant (Making Howard Do Everything Else)
Trust me, I totally agree that Bernadette should keep on working while pregnant and with the babies. She has an amazing job and is capable of doing everything she aspires to do. However, instead of preparing for the baby herself, she makes Howard do everything. Granted, she was on bed rest when pregnant with Michael, but if a mom wants to prepare for a baby, shouldn't she do so physically, as well? Then again, she could just be making Howard do all the baby preparations because she claims to do everything else, but does she really? We only ever see Howard, Raj, and Stuart doing it. Is it because she only wants to work at work and call it a day from there?
11 Runs All Her Errands Without Baby In Tow
Okay, so I know the showrunners aren't revealing the babies on the show but we never see the kids. They never really bring up where they are or who's watching them either. Is it the daycare or perhaps Bernadette's parents? In the first season, Howard and Bernadette mentioned Halley would sleep in Leonard's room while the gang hung out and ate dinner, but that was it. Were both the kids hiding in the bedrooms every time this group hung out? Call me crazy, but the luxury of going over a friend's house to eat is so you can bring your kids and not worry about them terrorizing any of the guests you don't know. Hiding them in the room seems a tad off.
10 Even Halley Thought Penny Was Her Mother
When Bernadette falls pregnant with Michael, a few complications force her to be on bed rest. Similarly. Howard also needs to be put on bed rest, leaving Halley to fend for herself... Just kidding! Like always, these two had their amazing friends watch their kids. Penny always said she didn't really want kids but decided to help out Bernadette and Howard anyway. In fact, Halley loved Penny's constant presence so much that she said her first word: mama. Sure, Bernadette was devastated, but that should have been sign number one that she needs to be a more consistent figure in their lives.
9 Judges Penny For Not Having A Baby
I know it sounds like I'm taking a beating on Bernadette right now, but it's only because I know she's capable of being an amazing mom and she seems to take the shortcuts one too many times. One annoying part was when Bernadette was pregnant with Michael, she told Penny, "You don’t seem much like a baby person," after Penny said she'd take care of Halley while they were on bedrest. To judge another woman for not having kids or not wanting kids is kind of low, especially since Bernadette was in the same boat not too long ago. She, above everyone, should respect Penny's childless decision.
8 Bed Rest With Michael (With Halley Nowhere In Sight)
I understand there's not much a mama can do when she's pregnant, needs bed rest, and has more children to take care of. Although she wants to be there for her kids, pick them up from school, and play with them — she needs to take care of her bump first. Bernadette did a great job with this, but we never saw or heard Halley at all when she was kickin' it in bed with her silk pajamas. If anything, she complains the entire time about her "dumb family" and how much she "misses work."
Pregnancy hormones can do a real number on a woman, but is Bernadette ever happy when pregnant or around her kids?
7 Didn't Plan Halley's First Birthday
When Halley's first birthday rolled around, Bernadette found herself still on bedrest. However, as a gal on bed rest who can't do much except flip through magazines, don't you think that was the PERFECT time to plan her only daughter's first birthday party!? She can scroll through Pinterest and find cool themes, jot down what decorations she's looking for, and even research companies to use. Instead, though, she pretty much forced Howard, Raj, and Stuart to do it all because she "couldn't." She may not have been able to utilize the bounce house Howard found, but she definitely could have planned it out!
6 Wants Michael Out Whether He's Ready Or Not
Understandably so, Bernadette did not do well on bed rest. She missed work, couldn't go out on girls' night, and missed spending time with her daughter. However, when Michael was past his due date, she didn't care anymore. She set her alarm clock and wanted him out whether he was "ready or not." Knowing how frustrated she was in those couple of months, moms everywhere felt her pain. But, to be honest, a baby will come when the baby is ready. Yes, there comes a time when the doctor needs to start the labor themselves, but typically, if it's the day of the due date or the day after — a mama can wait a little longer.
5 Wanted To Name The Baby Michael (Without Telling Howard)
Agreeing on a baby name is hard to do sometimes! There are so many names and combinations to try, and one name may be more special to one person as opposed to the other; however, I think many couples agree you shouldn't name your kid without conversing with your partner.
In Bernadette and Howard's case, Bernie had it in her mind to name the baby after her father. The problem is, she never told Howard that — she told Amy instead. While all the girls are calling Bernie's bump "Michael," Howard had no idea.
Call me crazy, but I think the baby daddy has a right to know about the name of his soon-to-be child.
4 Doesn't See The Benefit Of Being A Stay-At-Home Mom
Understandably, Bernadette really battles with the idea of being a stay-at-home mom. She loves her job, but now that she has two kids, she's finally feeling some sort of attachment to the idea of motherhood. She even claimed she didn't see the benefit of being a stay-at-home mom. As she and Howard discussed the idea of one of them staying home with them permanently, she decided on going back to work because she made the most money out of the two of them.
Many moms only see the benefit in being a stay-at-home mama, so the fact that Bernadette still didn't wrap her head around spending time with her kids is baffling.
3 Gets Angry When No One Can Babysit
As a dedicated fan of The Big Bang Theory who rewatches episodes constantly when I'm bored, it totally upsets me when Bernie gets mad when no one can babysit. If anything, her babysitters need a bigger break from the kids than they do! Now, I know fans don't see what Bernadette and Howard do all day, every day — but their kids never seem to be in the picture (even though they're the only ones with kids).
In one episode, Stuart isn't available to babysit the kids, which then infuriates Bernadette because she really wanted a date night with Howard. I think all working moms would appreciate a little date with their loved ones every once in a while, but you can't get mad at your sitter who is with them more than you are.
2 Gives The Kids Benadryl For The Sake Of A Jacuzzi
In the last season of Big Bang Theory, Bernadette and Howard wanted to take a relaxing dip in their outdoor jacuzzi. To make sure they had a night without interruptions, Bernadette claimed to have given her kids Benadryl so that they would sleep through the night. Now, while many moms do this at times—especially when the kids are sick—doing so just to have a few hours alone with your husband is a little harsh, especially after being at work all day. Do her kids see her for an hour a day and that's too much for her?
1 Not Bringing A Baby Monitor Over To Sheldon And Leonard's Apartment
Many first time parents go a little overboard with the spending in preparation for the baby. Just like Howard, they buy a bigger car and deck out the nursery so it's perfect for their little bundle of joy. One of the more popular things to buy before the baby comes is a baby monitor. Whether it's the kind you can hear from or the one with a video monitor, most mamas buy these because they're worried about something bad happening to the baby. But when Bernadette and Howard go over to Leonard and Sheldon's, they place Halley in Leonard's room — and that's the end of it. We don't really see a monitor or anything... Doesn't that sound strange for a first-time parent?