Has it already been a year, a month, and a few weeks since little Stormi Webster came into the collective lives of the entire world’s population? It’s really only been that brief, and yet an oh-so-long, amount of time since the uploading of the massively popular Youtube video “To Our Daughter.”
Just a year ago, Kylie was emerging from a social media hibernation to the glare and intensity of a world obsessed with her newborn. How time flies when there’s only hundreds of selfies and even more looks (and truly dozens of hair colors, some in shades that may not have existed pre-Jenner) to document the passing.
Kylie Jenner’s recovery from very pregnant to totally back in Kardashian action has been like an alien’s vague idea of a post-maternity recovery. It’s definitely not what most people go through or how quickly it takes the majority of the population to bounce back, but it’s generally followed the same plot points. And more importantly, it’s given us some of the best pictures in this new era of Kylie. And great pictures of Stormi, but realistically, her best days are up ahead. Twenty-five pictures may only be the tip of the iceberg with Kylie, but we’ve got some of the best.
25 Kylie Is A Great Mother But Not What We Should Compare Ourselves To
The most post-worthy aspect of Kylie’s relationship with Stormi is that she’s obviously totally nuts about her little girl. Putting aside her work wasn’t an issue during the pregnancy and the two are clearly inseparable. That’s the characteristic of Kylie’s mothering that’s definitely worth emulating and won’t lead to feeling bad about not meeting unrealistic standards. Those perfectly crafted eyebrows are another question but if all children were as doted on as Stormi is (but on a way smaller budget), it’d probably be a better world.
24 It's Just Not Realistic
If this perfectly staged image of Kylie on a white-sand beach during the magic hour and prime sunset doesn’t make it totally obvious, this isn’t realistic for most of us. It’s not worth worrying about because it’s not real. It’s not even her real life, it’s just the work of a lot of people in establishing an extended family as a super valuable lifestyle and brand. So definitely soak up all of Kim’s makeup secrets or whatever, but keep in mind there’s not one thing that can be bought that will make life into this.
23 Or Helpful, Really
Not that should take any of the fun out of sitting on the sidelines to this ridiculously opulent life. A baby in gold pants dressed to look like the physical embodiment of her name? However long it took to make Kylie’s cloud dress, which is a ridiculous phrase all on its own, is just fun to consider. How many tailors does that take and what level of explaining did Kylie have to get into to translate her vision? Did she have this outfit planned before she even gave birth? Whatever — I love all of it.
22 Truth Hurts, But It's Also A Relief
Basically, if anything about the Kardashians gets you down about your own life, then it’s time to take a step back. This photo looks fairly average and normal, besides that the baby carrier is designer and also she’s standing outside a mansion. Or, like, that watch and whatever that cost. Don’t sweat it. Stormi is a totally regular infant living in a ridiculous life because of who she was born to and we all get to share in the visual perfection of it all.
21 The Fact Is, We're All Working With A Lot Less
Oh, you don’t have the budget to commission specially made skeleton suits for you and your little one, that they’ll for sure never fit in again? Yeah, don’t count yourself as special- most of us are in that boat. And if you do have that kind of disposable income, it’s probably better spent on a savings account or literally doing anything else with it. Also, isn’t a relief that no one cares about our Halloween costumes? Like no one is looking at them with this level of curiosity and criticism.
20 So Don't Beat Yourself Up Over Perfection
Social media is totally a big old numbers game and it’s very easy to be jealous of posts with way more likes when your snaps are barely reaching the double digits of likes. But then again, it’s pretty calming no one is looking at images of us online that just exist forever. Someone on every continent is probably looking at a picture of Kylie right now and that’s pretty stressful, even if they’re all fairly perfect. Just saying, anonymity is underrated.
19 Or The Illusion Of It
Fairly unsettling garage she's in aside, this picture was probably intended to sell lip kits and it almost certainly did its job. That shade is amazing. Side note: Remember Kim talking about how much she regrets having her baby hairs lasered off? Because I do. Glad the younger generation learned from the mistakes of their elders. Also, totally fair if you don’t recall Kim talking about wishing she embraced her body hair more. Just the kind of stuff that fills up my brain.
18 Girl Knows Her Angles
The vast, sweeping majority of new mothers aren’t cycling through this many high-end weaves or hairstyles at all. It’s the simple reason that there’s barely time to make ends meet and function while providing for yourself and your child, let alone achieving this level of extra glam. There’s a lot more time to spend in a makeup artist’s chair when you don’t have to use a ladder to get on the roof and clean out the rain gutter, you know? Or like, the time it takes to bug someone else to get up there and do it if you’re afraid of heights.
17 But She Also Has A Lot Of Help
You know what really helps craft fool-proof viral social media posts? Well, besides a professional level of expert skill going into your daily makeup look and all that. For sure access to highly sought after merchandise long before anyone else. If anything is going to make a T-shirt look way more glamorous than your average T-shirt, it’s that fact. Timing and a super cute blonde bob is the secret to all of it. Also, a level of synergy in a couple that sells each other’s items doesn’t hurt.
16 Keep That In Mind Before Going Too Hard On Your Own Social Media
Basically everything worth envying in Kylie’s life isn’t the actual stuff that matters in life and it’s only worth having fun while looking at her images. And not actually worrying about it or like, gathering all your information from her. She’s a very young mother with some unique talents but a ton of resources and help, so there’s no point in idolizing her. Steal some ideas, make them way more affordable and live your life with a smile! And the name Stormi is taken.
15 Money Helps, Too
Remember that awkward misunderstanding in Season 1 of KUWTK when Paris Hilton thought she could just get free stuff from Dash? And Khloe had to be like, yo — we’re running a business here and I know you can afford this stuff. First off, totally fair if that one’s not ringing a bell and second off — how far we’ve come. Anyway, the point of that reference that’s more than a decade old was that… Wait, hold on. I’ve got it! Nope. It was just fun to remember.
14 If Only To Buy All Those Matching Outfits
That chubby face! Those cheeks! Those very soulful eyes! I never realized how much darker Stormi’s eyes are than her mom’s. Wow, cheeks for days on Ms. Stormi. Everyone with social media and any power of observation knows that Kylie’s all about the matching outfits with Stormi. How else would we know they’re forever and eternally linked? Besides the front page of every magazine and our own unending curiosity. Anyway, the age of Stormi has meant a lot of cuteness, and there are no signs of it slowing down.
13 And Touring With An Infant In Comfort
How can one of the least suitable places for a very young infant to be anywhere near (aka an international music tour) be made into a totally comfortable environment for a small child? Don’t ask me. Kylie definitely knows way more about those logistics than I have any clue about. All I know is that going on the road isn’t how most of us spend our first months on this planet, but it’s nearly impossible Kylie would let that get in her or Stormi's way.
12 Even If The Outfits Are Deceptively Casual
If we’ve learned anything from the Kardashians, it’s that athleisure (or whatever this outfit is) is no excuse not to look fab. This outfit might look casual because it’s a jumble of buttons and like, apparently bike shorts are a thing? According to Kim, but I’m not totally on board. Anyway, an outfit can look like the odds and ends from an L.L. Bean clearance rack and still necessitate full makeup and perfect hair. Don’t let those sneakers fool you for even a second.
11 Not That All Of Them Are At All Casual
And then there are the outfits that are obviously not even a little bit casual and are a total event to even get into. This dress actually ranks low in that category, as far as Kylie’s outfits go (anyone else remember her talking about the physical pain her Met Gala crystal bodysuit incurred? Or just me?). But this dress definitely represents the weirder, way less realistic phase-in Kylie’s post-baby transformation. Besides that it’s unrealistic for most moms to have the energy or childcare to go out so soon after delivery, there’s the physical element.
10 Money Can Also Be The Secret To Clear Skin
It’s rare to see a fresh-faced Kylie, but there’s been a lot more of it since Stormi came into this world. We’re not complaining. We get to missing her freckles! It’s not like Kylie’s schedule has slowed to a routine that looks like other people’s lives, but it’s been slightly closer to normal. Even without a scrap of makeup on, Kylie most likely has high-end eyelash extensions in. Anyway, envy aside, these two are obviously very happy together.
9 And Looking Great
Would Travis Scott’s Astroworld tour have had baby gear if not for little Stormi? Look, it’s doubtful but there’s no use in thinking about how things might have gone differently. What matters is that Kylie’s wearing some kind of cinched leather blazer, she looks like some kind of time traveling spy, and Stormi looks very comfy and cozy in her mother’s arms. And this was probably taken in, like, a bathroom on a tour bus? Whatever; Stormi’s pants are adorable.
8 And, Like, Tons Of Luxurious Vacations
Again, so happy to see the return of the freckles. They truly are the perfect accessory for all these snuggling shots with Stormi. It’s not like running a billion-dollar makeup industry is easy, even if Kylie makes it look easy. It’s just that of the many trade-offs in her life, sacrificing looks isn’t at all one of them. Nor is any chance of running out of gorgeous, exotic locations to visit and like, pillowcases that help clean your skin while you sleep.
7 Definitely Useful For Buying Silk Pajamas
Speaking of types of silk clothing that most likely cleanse the skin or some other weirdly technological detail. It’s hilarious how old this picture feels, even though it was undoubtedly taken in the last year. We just have high standards about the many events we need to see the Kardashians at! At this point, I’ve been desensitized to words made out of balloons. We’ve all been spoiled by the pink color schemes and toy luxury cars. You gotta go bigger.
6 When We Were Still In The Tracksuit Phase
The tracksuit phase made the most sense out of the whole KarJenner pregnancy experience. Sure, Kylie’s hair and makeup are flawless in a way that’s just everyday for her but would be a very special occasion for the rest of us. And the car and outfit probably cost more than like, most of our homes. But she’s dressed comfortably, and that checks out with the experience of motherhood. The winged eye is out of this world, but as Kylie pictures go, this one is surprisingly normal.
5 And Then We Weren't
You know when Kim Kardashian is out in subarctic weather wearing a body-con dress and you have to wonder if their bodies just experience life differently? That’s what a lot of Kylie’s transition from totally pregnant to looking like her body never made a human felt like. Take this picture, for example. It takes some moms years to get back their pre-baby body if it ever happens. Kylie had the added advantage of youth, but still, the transition is like whoa.
4 How Is It Possible To Look This Good After Childbirth?
Does the girl ever take a day off? Sure, getting ready just means sitting still while someone else does her makeup (not that Kylie’s make up skills were ever in question — she just definitely can get her makeup done professionally at any time), but still, this is not what motherhood looks like for most of us. And more importantly, how do you go about changing diapers with those nails? Truly just want the wisdom to share with the rest of humanity.
3 It Helps To Have A Team
Support systems and the love of a bestie are all well and good, but what really does the trick for achieving Kylie’s inner glow is a team of full-time professionals. When that many people make their bread and butter and pay rent from a salary earned by making you look good, it’s a lot easier to look this good. Definitely still took a lot of dedication on Kylie’s part, or maybe some weird nutrition plan. And then whoever’s Googling was needed to find this amazing suit.
2 No, Like A Full On Team Of Professionals
It really bears repeating — when a gaggle of people receives their dental benefits, 401K and whatever else from having a personal investment in another person’s appearance — you’re setting up that person to look iconic. The best beauty secret really just is wealth and a fortune to spend on these things. Kylie definitely brings her own style into things or she wouldn’t have such a cult following, but this definitely takes a village. Also, those tiny glasses are absolutely ridiculous and amazing.
1 Also Hard Work
She’s most likely the one making the final decisions, but Kylie also has a squad to find these amazing clothes. A bunch of eagle-eyed fashionistas. It doesn’t hurt that designers would probably bend over backward to get her to wear something of theirs. It’s that ridiculous irony that when you’re this wealthy, you just get clothes and other stuff for free. Why? Because the designers will make so much profit off people seeing you wear their gear, it’s like an unofficial sponsorship.