We spend a lot of time looking for names that instill pride in our kids, our families, and in ourselves — names that sound cool, effortlessly stylish, suitable for our kids, and constantly relevant. But the truth is, not every name out there is like this. While the vast majority of names are just typical names, there are a number that are just so ridiculous and bad that it's actually laughable.
This is why we've created a list with a number of names that were actually chosen by somewhat foolish parents. This is why we've created a compilation that parents can use to remind themselves that there can be some backlash to the names we pick for our children, as well as to remind parents that just because a name sounds or even looks cool at first, it doesn't mean that it'll stay that way forever.
However, this list also contains a few pretty pedestrian and even famous names that don't seem all that bad. But that's just on first glance. Because these names have become a tad tainted in recent years thanks to some individuals who have used them. Because of this, they should probably be avoided. Without further ado, here are 25 U.S. baby names that mom will regret picking in 2019.
This name may be spelled like the first five letters of the alphabet but it's actually pronounced, "Ab-si-dee", which makes the whole thing even worse. This name had to be added to the baby name list because they are at least 328 people who are registered under it. That's 328 too many, as the name is just so ridiculous and utterly dumb that there are no words that can adequately describe it. We just feel bad for the teacher who has to call out this kid's name during morning role-call.
Kaitlyn is more than an acceptable name, even though it's shared by a couple less than favorable celebrities. But one mom in the States decided that she would spell the name completely differently. No, she didn't use a "C", she decided to use the Roman Numeral for the number 8, "VIII." This meant that it would ad the "eight" sound in the name, Kaitlyn. There's just no way that the mom is going to be able to live with this decision as this is one of the silliest names in history.
Ariana is a beautiful name that many people want to use for their girls. This is especially true thanks to celebrities like Ariana Huffington and, most of all, Ariana Grande. But moms don't always want to directly take a name from a celebrity. In fact, they like to alter it in a way that honors the celebrity but gives their child their own unique flavor and sound. This is all good, but Harrianna is NOT the way to do it. The random double consonant thing is also a bit off.
No, the name North is not cool. Especially when the surname of the kid is "West." Kim Kardashian and Kanye West completely painted this name in dark colors. There's just no way that parents won't regret calling their kid this super-trendy and hollow name now that these two celebrities have done it themselves. Besides, a kid who shares this name with the mini Hollywood royal may not have the easiest road to go down. After all, constantly comparisons are bound to occur.
Names with the letter "X" are very cool when they are classy and sleek like Xavier. But Xzayvian doesn't even pronounce the "X". The actual pronunciation of this jungle of letters is "Zay-Vee-An". Although the name would be a great word for Scrabble, it sounds totally silly in real life. Nobody will know how to say it aloud and everyone will want to dislike the kid named it. Moms have to be smart enough to regret naming their kid this if they were mean enough to do it in the first place.
Daenerys is kind of a cool name. We have to admit that. Especially since it's usually followed by "Targaryen. First of her name. Queen of the Andals and the Seven Kingdoms. Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea. Mother of Dragons" and so on and so on. It even provides a great nickname that's pretty mainstream, "Dany". But now that Game of Thrones is about to finish, moms may regret calling heir daughters this in years to come. bAfter all, who's to say that Daenerys doesn't end up being the villain of the series by the end.
Alexa was once one of the most beautiful names in existence. It's likely that you know a number of people with the name, most of whom are probably lovely. However, thanks to technology, calling someone Alexa is kind of inconvenient. This is because whenever you say it allowed, your phone, or Amazon Echo, responds. This product is just that good. However, the name Siri is totally up for grabs since nobody with a brain would use that product when Alexa is on the market.
The name Kulture is precisely why so many people dislike Millenials. It sounds utterly pretentious and way too much like a hashtag. But still, it didn't stop Cardi B and her husband Offset from using it as the name for their first born. Although they used the name for a girl, it could also be used for a boy. However, it absolutely shouldn't be. Why? Because it's just plain dumb. Even Cardi B has received some backlash for using. It's along the lines of naming your kid "princess" or "Heiress". Your child is a kid, not an accessory.
There's never really been a time when the name Stormi was all that popular. This is because it's always had a connection to a job that we can't discuss here. Additionally, it just sounds a bit silly. But, this didn't stop Kylie Jenner from using it as the name for her daughter. In all likelihood, many people have called their kid Stormi just because of her. But, let's be honest, the name is going to cause some issues down the road. Not just because of the connection between certain people in the news, but also because it's too weird.
There was absolutely nothing wrong with the name Laurie (otherwise spelled Lori") up until March 19th, 2019. This is when actor Lori Laughlin entered the news because of the whole college admission case thing. Now, she's one of the most disliked celebrities around. Not just by her fellow Hollywood elite, but also by the general public. This is why parents will probably regret calling their daughters this name. They may also feel similarly about the name "Felicity".
Chardonnay is a wine for very specific folks. It's not usually one that people like as much as a nice Pinot Grig or even Sauvignon Blanc. That's because Chardonnay tends to be on the sweet side of things with a very rich and vanilla flavor. While some people quite like it, most people don't like it as a name for a human being. This is because as the kid gets older, the people around her will begin to see how off-putting it is for a 35-year-old woman in an office to be named "Chardonnay". Still, this doesn't stop some parents from thinking it would be cute for a four-year-old.
Michael is among the most pedestrian, classic, and even quite nice names on this list. In theory, there's nothing all that bad about it. In fact, it's a name used by many great characters and famous individuals such as the late great Michael Clarke Duncan, Michael Keaton, Michael Fassbender, Michael Douglas, Michael Kors, and the late-great Michael Chrichton who created Jurassic Park. However, the most famous Michael in the world is back in the news thanks to a very unsettling HBO documentary called Finding Neverland. This is precisely why parents will regret calling their kids this name.
Another reason why so many people dislike Millenials has to do with the amount of emojis they typically like to use in their social media posts and text messages. A few parents have taken their love of emojis to the next level and actually called their daughters, "Hearteyes." Yes, this is a real name, we didn't make it up. This may be one of the silliest names on this list. There's no doubt that the child will feel the everlasting sting of this name as they deal with kids on the playground. Once a parent sees this, they may be filled with regret.
A lot of moms in 2018 and 2019 really wanted to try and modernize their children's names by using the letter "Z." Although there are some nice names that incorporate the final letter of the alphabet, many of them leave something to be desired. Freezia is almost certainly one of them. First of all, it reminds us of the frozen treat Freezies, which isn't exactly the most romantic thing to call a child. Additionally, it was the name of a villain in Dragonball Z. Other than that, there's really nothing else to say about this name except for that it's just regrettable.
Although it's not particularly modern, Roseanne isn't all that bad of a name. In fact, it was once an extremely popular one. And back in the day, comedian Roseanne Barr definitely made it stronger. After all, she was one of the most forward-thinking, open, thought-provoking, and hilarious comedians around. But in recent years, that has completely changed. In fact, this celebrity just adores getting herself in bad scenarios that make us associate her with the name in a not exactly good way.
The whole combing names thing is also kinda strange. Jakmason, which is a name that nobody's spell-check likes, is a combination of "Jack" and "Mason." On their own, Jack and Mason are perfectly acceptable and cool names. Put together, they sound like someone has eaten too much popcorn at once. It's okay to have a hard time deciding what to call a child. But combing two very dissimilar names is not the way to compromise. It's a way to make a child unpopular.
And here we are returning to the fact that people dislike Millenials. It's pretty hard to defend the entire generation when they decide to name their kids "Wizdom." Much like "Kulture," Wizdom is one of the most pretentious names we've ever heard. While it could sound cool to a mom in the moment, eventually it will dawn on her that she's made a very poor decision. The "Z" in the name only makes matters a lot worse. So, moms, do your best and stay clear of this name.
What is the point of naming a child after a completely random rural thing such as a ridge? It's not even all that pretty of a name when compared to slightly hippie ones such as "River," "Storm," "Rainbow," or "Meadow"; which was only cool in The Sopranos. Ridge just feels so random and doesn't even feel nice on the tongue. Still, many parents, mostly in rural areas where there are ridges, have been choosing this name. We think that by the end of the year, these people will start to think twice about it.
Ensley sounds like a poor-acted, one-dimensional character on a CW show that lasts all of three episodes. It's clearly an attempt to create a name for a girl who will end up being a model or someone else that captures the attention of men. But anyone with a brain will see that the name is just downright silly. It's a name that works as a surname, but it's not one that transfers well to the beginning of a driver's license. In fact, if we were cops, we'd definitely ticket anyone who had the audacity to stick with the name "Ensley".
No matter how you spell it, Jurnee is the name of that character we all pity in any movie set near the slums. It's funny how the name works for both the most unappealing parts of the city and the rural countryside. Additionally, any culture or country could, and do, attempt to get away with. Regardless, it's a name that moms should avoid due to the fact that it sounds overblown and particularly hollow.
Naming a child after a city is always taking a chance. However, it can work for certain individuals. For instance, London may be an atypical name, but it does have a nice sound. Cairo isn't all that bad in theory. In fact, it has a nice ring to it. However, it could be seen as a bit pretentious and eager for attention. When a mom and dad decide that they're going to switch the "C" for a "K", things get highlighted astronomically. This is why Kairo is definitely one for the stupid list.
You wouldn't call your kid Cher, would you? How about, Madonna? Or Seal? One work musical icon names are just not for anybody else. This is the first reason why moms will eventually regret calling their child Kanye. However, now that we're in 2019, we have all seen sides of Kanye West that are less than appealing. At one stage, he was just a guy who was high on himself that made an award show uncomfortable for Taylor Swift. But in 2019, he's proven to be a lot more harmful to others.
The biggest problem with Leetiana is how to actually pronounce it. One struggle is between "Lee-ah-te-ana" and "Lay-ah-te-ana". And another has to do with how to let the "Ti" or "Te" roll off the tongue. It's just a bit of a migraine. Besides all that, the fact that this name is spelled so oddly makes it seem pretty affected. Eventually, moms will get tired of having to correct others when they mispronounce it that they will end up regretting choosing it altogether.
Anagrams are also another really bad idea for a child's name. If you want to call a kid something, just be straight forward and do it. That's the only saving grace behind names like "Wizdom" and "Kulture." But an anagram just makes things utterly nonsensical. Clearly, the parents who have chosen to call their daughter Neveah, just wanted to let people know that their kid is "Heaven." As the child grows up, she will no doubt develop some animosity for her parents because of her name. This will cause mom to end up regretting it.
There was a time when Logan was a very common and utterly cool name for a kid. After all, it's one of the name's used by Hugh Jackman's X-Men character, Wolverine. But nowadays the name has an entirely new connotation. When seeing this name, it's now challenging not to think about Youtuber Logan Paul. Logan, of course, is infamous on the internet. This person is responsible for uploading a number of really unsettling videos just so he could become somewhat famous. Because of him, every mom will regret calling their son Logan.
Sources: Neotorama, The Stir.Cafe Moms, Kidspot, GQ