They say there are compromises in any relationship, but one boyfriend may be haggling a little too much with his girlfriend by saying he won't change dirty diapers.
In a letter to Slate's Care and Feeding advice blog, one anonymous woman brought up a potential issue with her boyfriend when it comes to changing diapers. He says that if they were to have a baby, he shouldn't be responsible for dealing with poop.
"He said that since he mows our lawn, I can change everything that isn’t pee," writes the concerned partner. "He was laughing, but I don’t believe he’s joking at all."
She doesn't provide much more background information, unfortunately, just her perspective. No information was given regarding the length of time the two have been together, but from the sounds of it, the two don't have any children. Still, the comments would be concerning for anyone looking to make a family.
Slate's writer responded proposing the question of why the boyfriend believes this is an appropriate response. They speculate that maybe he's looking for attention, or maybe he was lightening the move, but the worst option is he thinks that's acceptable for a father. The publication suggests the potential-mom-to-be talks it out with him to get to the bottom of the comment because those beliefs could be a potential plan-changer.
Being a mother is difficult enough, and recent studies suggest that women still take on a lion's share of child-rearing. In fact, a Cornell University study proved as much. They say that women take on more of the parenting tasks that feel more like work, while fathers get to have more "fun" with the baby. Don't get the study twisted however, the results — which were gathered by surveying how parents feel during specific activities — found that both genders recorded higher levels of happiness with their children than without. The big takeaway was that women recorded lower levels of happiness. On its own, this seems troubling, but digging deeper into the data reveals that most of a father's parenting is done alongside the mother, while moms do a lot of solo parenting.
Considering both men and women work almost equal hours these days, these results show there's still a lot to be done to ensure parody in terms of parenting loads. With that in mind, jokes that suggest a man shouldn't have to change diapers because he mows the lawn seem a little too out of date.