It makes sense that an unplanned pregnancy would create fear, anxiety, or uncertainty about the future. However, many women are surprised at their emotional reaction to a planned pregnancy. The truth is that holding a positive pregnancy test in your hand is a very surreal moment that is often accompanied by many intense emotions all at once.
Just thinking about that moment can bring up a list of fears in women considering getting pregnant. These fears are incredibly normal. If you are struggling with the idea of getting pregnant, just know that you are not alone. All the fear surrounding this decision is more common than most women realize.
10 A Fear Of Infertility
While it may be irrational, many women actually fear the anticipation of getting pregnant because they worry that they can't. If having kids has always been a life goal, but it just hasn't been the right time yet, that waiting period can create a lot of scary thoughts. We also live in a society that constantly seems to remind women of their ticking biological clock, which can add to the stress and fear that they are already experiencing.
According to the CDC, among heterosexual women in the United States, ages 15-49 with no prior births, about 1 in 5 (19%) are unable to get pregnant after a year of trying. While the reproductive age of a woman is considered to be between 15 and 49, her peak reproductive years are the late teens through the late 20s. By age 30, fertility does begin to slowly decline.
9 Fearing Never Ending Morning Sickness
While morning sickness is usually something that occurs during the first trimester of pregnancy and only lasts throughout the morning, that is not always the case. Some women experience the effects of "morning sickness" all day, every day, and throughout their entire pregnancy. Just that thought alone can be terrifying for someone considering pregnancy.
Morning sickness typically includes feelings of nausea and vomiting, but it can also include headaches and fatigue. On top of that, many women also experience food aversions during pregnancy which can make eating or cooking very difficult.
8 The Fear Of Sleep Deprivation
Sleeping during pregnancy can prove to be a difficult task. According to Sleep Foundation, there are many contributors to sleep struggles during pregnancy. The first one is general discomfort. As a woman's belly grows, it can be much harder to find a comfortable position.
On top of that, pregnant women generally have to pee more often during the night and that has been known to keep them up. However, changing hormones, excitement, or anxiety about motherhood can also cause insomnia.
On top of the lack of sleep that pregnancy can cause, the fear of what a newborn will do to a sleep cycle can also create some stress. Waking up at all hours of the night to nurse or tend to a crying baby can sound extremely overwhelming and exhausting.
7 A Fear Of Fainting
Some women might relate to getting a little dizzy or lightheaded when they stand up too fast or spend too much time in a hot shower. However, pregnancy is a completely different experience. It's actually pretty common for a woman's blood pressure to lower during pregnancy due to the changes in hormones. Some women might not notice, but if you have a history of fainting or passing out, pregnancy can make that fear even worse.
Women who have a history of passing out may need to plan ahead a bit more. In order to ease those fears, it's recommended to keep snacks on hand, avoid skipping meals, and stay cool to avoid overheating.
6 The Fear Of Not Being Able To Control Your Body
It can take years of work to feel confident and in control of your own body as a woman. Anyone who has struggled with feeling like things in life just happen to them or those who have lived through situations where they lacked control, pregnancy can seem terrifying.
While the pregnant woman is ultimately in charge of housing their unborn baby until they are born, it can quickly feel like pregnancy is taking over, leaving the pregnant woman feeling like they have no control over the changes happening to their body. The best way to combat this fear is by focusing on what there is to control. Set intentions, create a morning routine, stick to a meal plan that you love, and continue to do things that help you feel empowered as a pregnant woman.
5 The Fear Of Gaining Too Much Weight
Anyone who has struggled with insecurities about their weight in the past can share in that fear of pregnancy weight gain. Whether you are happy with your current weight and terrified of losing that progress or have simply always had a difficult relationship with food, pregnancy can bring those concerns to the surface.
The best thing to remember if you are worried about pregnancy weight gain is that everybody and every pregnancy is different. Instead of focusing on what other women look like or what their scale says, think about your growing baby. Try to focus on nourishing the life that you are bringing into this world.
4 Fearing The Way Pregnancy Could Impact A Career
It is unfortunately a realistic fear that pregnancy could have a negative impact on your career or even lead to discrimination in the workplace. According to NCT, the evidence suggests that becoming a mother does affect a woman's career, but there are many contributing factors.
While we know that having children is a big contributor to the gender pay gap, it's also important to keep women's own attitudes and perspectives on children in mind. Will you want to spend more time at home with your baby? Will your desires for a career lessen? Maybe or maybe not. If those around you are making these types of assumptions, but they don't align with your career goals, don't hesitate to speak up and prove them wrong!
3 The Fear Of Mental Health Struggles
Mental health struggles like anxiety and depression can not only feel brutal but also extremely isolating. Struggling with these things before pregnancy can drastically increase the fear of them returning during or after pregnancy.
According to APA, up to 1 in 7 women experience postpartum depression, and it usually occurs within the first six weeks after giving birth. Postpartum anxiety can affect 15% of new moms. While these mental health struggles are real and valid, it's important to remember that you are not alone. Many women experience this and there are resources that will help. Talking about these fears and keeping that communication open can also help to alleviate them.
2 A Fear Of Intimacy Changing With Your Partner
The truth about pregnancy and bringing a child into this world is that it will likely change most things in your life. You will not only see yourself differently, but you will likely see your partner in a different light as well.
Instead of trying to hold onto the past or your old self before pregnancy, try to focus on embracing this new version of yourself. Intimacy with your partner may look a little different, especially as your baby bump continues to grow. Instead of fearing that change, look at it as a new opportunity for you and your partner to grow romantically.
1 Fearing The Worst Of The 'What Ifs'
The thought of getting pregnant can come with many fears. However, women can drive themselves crazy by focusing on all the 'what ifs' in life and constantly thinking about the worst-case scenarios. What if something happens to me and I can't take care of my baby? What if something happens to my baby? What if I lose my partner or have to become a single mom? What if a c-section is your biggest fear and that's what doctors tell you needs to happen?
If you are thinking about getting pregnant but can't stop your mind from worrying about these things, take a deep breath and start imagining the best-case scenario. It can be so easy to get lost in fear, but there is no benefit to worrying or stressing over the worst possible outcomes. Start focusing on the best possible reality that you can create. We have a lot of power over our lives and finding out what actionable steps you can take to create your dream reality will help you feel more in control.