Who will be joining you in the delivery room needs to be thought out carefully, especially for those receiving a lot of pressure from loved ones. This pressure can cause some mothers-to-be to cave in and allow too many people into their delivery room, or someone they're not fully comfortable with.
There are many reasons why you may not want certain people in the delivery room when you're about to go through one of the most unpredictable journeys of your life. These tips will provide you with a few ways to approach those friends or family members who are hoping to be a part of this experience, but who unfortunately just won't make the cut.
10 Sharing the experience with your partner
Being comfortable is the best way to go when you're ready to deliver. This is how many couples decide and it's probably the most understandable reason to give. All you have to say is that you'd like to keep the experience between you and your partner, after all, you started it together! And done, no arguing here.
9 Your significant other is all you need
The advantages that come with having that one special person in the room is that you're starting this experience with very little anxiety about it, as you surely trust them and already communicate with them regularly. You may also feel a great sense of comfort and support knowing that you're in their care. Appreciate this time together as it can be a very good bonding experience for you and your partner.
8 It's a very graphic scene
This works well for a sensitive friend or family member who may decide to pass after hearing everything that may happen in that room. Don't be afraid to get wild with it, give every daunting detail! But maybe try not to traumatize them enough to never have children of their own.
On a serious note, it can be a lot for some to take in, and you don't want to have someone faint or get so shocked that you can see the fear on their face as you need complete peace and confidence in the process.
7 You want to maintain a level of privacy
This experience will probably be the most exposed you'll ever feel, so be sure to choose people who you're comfortable with seeing everything. Even if they choose not to look, they might see something by accident or by curiosity, and you want to be comfortable in this knowledge since it’s big part of the birthing process. You should have a minimal amount of stress, pressure, or any other negative feelings in order to have the best labor possible.
You can easily give this reason to a father, brother, sister or someone that you may be uncomfortable with in such a revealing situation.
6 You don't want to offend anyone
Some of us have a foul mouth, bad temper, or get overfilled with emotion when we're under a lot of pressure. The people that know you really well may think nothing of it or not take any offense to it, but there are others that might mind hearing you be so vulgar, or in an irrational state. For some, it may be hard to control, so make sure that the people in the room will understand that side of you if it decides to come out.
You may also be concerned about what others will think of you if you get very impatient, angry or swear a lot, which is definitely not something you want to be focusing on.
5 Feeling crowded and observed
The best environment to have from the beginning of your labor is a quiet, peaceful and comfortable one. The last thing I'd recommend is inviting too many people in the room as it can feel crowded and overwhelming. Remember, there will already be a doctor and a few nurses in the room helping you with your labor which will fill up the delivery room very quickly. Having only a select few people in the room can make for a less confusing time and keeps your focus on the task at hand.
4 Discuss your options with your partner or someone close to you
Before you go telling anybody anything, it's a good idea to share your feelings and thoughts with someone close to you, maybe the person who will definitely be joining you in the delivery room. It will help to get a different perspective on the situation, especially if you're feeling too much pressure from others. Sometimes it's good to have someone tell you "who cares what they think," because that's often so true and we just need to get a little kick in the butt.
Don't be shy to communicate your feelings to someone who will understand and listen to your concerns.
3 Getting distracted during delivery
It can be intimidating to have so many eyes on you while you're in labor. You can avoid this by keeping it low-key. Let your loved ones know that you can only have so many people in the room for your comfort level and to keep you from getting distracted.
Labor is like a job, go in there like you have a business to run, and just get it done! The hospital will have restrictions on how many people are allowed in the labor room, so make sure to take a look at your hospital's regulations.
2 Dropping the hammer
The hard part is letting your loved ones know that you have decided not to invite them in the delivery room. Some can take that pretty hard, especially if you previously told them they may be able to join you. But don't let those details stand in your way, your big day will be about so much more than that, and you will be so happy that you decided to have it your way. There's no better way to go than with what your heart desires.
Having that conversation will be the last uncomfortable thing you may have to do, but it will pay off and you can make it up to them by including them in other special moments.
1 Make everyone you love feel included
Finally, to relieve any tension for those who won't be joining you in the delivery room, include them by having them there for your special moments leading up to the delivery. You can invite them to wait in the waiting room during the delivery, and as soon as the baby arrives they can get the first glimpse of your baby.
Or you can promise to have your significant other call them with updates as the labor progresses, and again when the baby is born, so they can make their way to the hospital. In the first week or two with the baby at home, you can accept help that is offered by them