When toddlers become aggressive, there is usually a trigger behind it. Because of it, it is a normal part of childhood development for toddlers to become aggressive from time to time. But just because it is normal does not mean that parents enjoy dealing with toddlers who are seemingly out of control and incapable of making better decisions. And because of this, knowing what causes toddler aggression and how to deal with it can make all the difference in the world in diffusing it quickly and effectively.

Like many over-the-top emotions in toddlers, aggression is generally a sign that there is something else going on. But because there is an inability to properly express emotions, what is being felt comes out explosively.

If parents react in kind, the situation will only escalate. And not only does this not help toddlers try to better understand and try to explain what is being felt inside, it promotes the idea that reacting with yelling and screaming is appropriate when things do not go the way they were anticipated to.

RELATED: How To Respond When Your Toddler Is Aggressive To The Babysitter

Here is what causes toddler aggression and where it comes from.

What Causes Toddler Aggression

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via Pexels/Mohamed Abdelghaffar

When toddlers are acting aggressively, it is generally a symptom of emotions bubbling underneath the surface that they cannot understand. It does not by any means make them "bad" or "troubled" kids, according to Psychology Today.

Toddlers are just looking to be understood. And when they recognize that they are not, aggressive behavior can rear its ugly head.

Per the publication, many times the most aggressive behavior occurs when toddlers are not getting what they want. Some of those things include:

  • Not getting enough attention
  • Hungry and not getting food
  • Not getting affection desperately needed
  • Another child's toy
  • An item at the store
  • Allowing them to do something that puts them in harm's way

There are a number of reasons that toddlers can become aggressive. And most times, according to Psychology Today, parents will recognize that aggression centers around being tired, ill, stressed, or other emotions that cannot be expressed. And because of this, parents may be able to head off aggression before it strikes.

Signs Of Aggression In Toddlers

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via Pexels/Monstera

Aggression in toddlers can show itself in several ways. As such, one toddler's form of aggression may differ from another toddler's.

The ways that toddlers show aggression, according to Healthline include:

  • Crying
  • Yelling
  • Biting
  • Hitting
  • Kicking
  • Pulling
  • Shoving
  • Throwing

Most of these actions are generally associated with meltdowns or temper tantrums, per the publication. As such, the way that tantrums are dealt with is equally important as how the associated behavior is managed as well.

Ways To Combat Toddler Aggression

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via Pexels/Allan Mas

It can be frustrating to deal with aggressive toddlers. Mainly because at this age, they are not able to be reasoned with. As such, parents need to come up with ways to cope with the tantrums and meltdowns so that they do not inadvertently make the situation worse when attempting to remedy it.

According to the Cleveland Clinic, ways to combat toddler aggression include:

  • Remaining calm to not escalate the level of aggression being exhibited
  • Do not reward toddlers' tantrums by giving them what they wanted after telling them "no"
  • Tell toddlers when they have good or even normal behavior, so they recognize how to behave
  • Teach toddlers the names of emotions so they can begin to express how they feel versus going straight to aggressive behavior
  • Recognize triggers that cause aggressive behavior and do the best to eliminate them
  • Give appropriate rewards when it is clear that toddlers made a good choice and did not act aggressively

When parents do their best to deescalate situations or verbalize what appropriate behavior is, calmly, dealing with toddler aggression is much more effective than yelling or screaming back.

And the more often this is done, in conjunction with teaching toddlers to verbalize what they are feeling rather than physically showing it, the aggression will eventually fade to a distant memory.

When To Worry About Toddler Aggression

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via Pexels/Alexander Dummer

There are times that regardless of what is done to try to stop a toddler's aggressive behavior from happening, nothing is effective. And it is then that there may need to be some intervention on the part of healthcare professionals to determine if there is, in fact, something to worry about.

According to What To Expect, reasons parents may need to worry about aggression in their toddlers include:

  • Aggression not being situational but lasts for weeks
  • Inability to cope with toddler when aggression occurs
  • Injuries to parents, siblings, peers, or even toddlers themselves happen often
  • Physical attacks from toddlers are the norm
  • Toddlers are removed from activities as a result of their behavior
  • Parents fear others will be injured when around their toddlers

If behavior like this is occurring, toddlers are not a lost cause, per the publication. They simply need some help to understand how they are supposed to behave. This is something that may take time to instill. But with the right help and some patience, it is possible. And because of this, parents should not lose hope in their aggressive toddlers.

Source: Psychology Today, Healthline, Cleveland Clinic, What To Expect