One in four pregnancies end in miscarriage, and one in 100 of them end in stillbirth. These alarming statistics show that chances are, you or someone you know will have gone through one or both of these unfortunate events. No woman should ever have to endure the physical, mental and emotional trauma that comes with a miscarriage or stillbirth.
While the aforementioned mental and emotional after-effects that come from enduring a miscarriage or stillbirth is often talked about, the physical ones are usually skimped over. As we all know, a woman's body changes when she's pregnant in many ways. If you managed to deliver a healthy baby, then the pregnancy was worth it in the end. But if your pregnancy ended in miscarriage or stillbirth, all you're left with is a body that once carried a baby inside.
It's certainly more evident the farther that you're along. Your growing belly no longer has a baby growing inside of you, and your body stops preparing for the bundle of joy that you were expecting. Any breast milk that may have come in is now useless, you don't feel your unborn baby kicking or moving inside you anymore, and then there's the weight gain. A miscarriage early on might not leave much or any weight gain, but a stillbirth- especially if you're close to or past your due date- will have that as a lasting scar with nothing to show for it.
Going back to the mental and emotional trauma of such a situation- experiencing a miscarriage or stillbirth can shatter a woman's self-image. This is only made worse if you experience more than one because you may find yourself wondering What the hell is wrong with my body?. Many women who lose a baby feel betrayed by their own body and become angry that it couldn't bring a healthy baby into the world. When you look in the mirror, you may feel disgusted by any physical reminders that you were ever pregnant. But when those reminders slowly disappear, it's yet another reminder of what wasn't meant to be. Therapy may be something to seriously consider if you feel it's necessary.
One of the worst parts of a miscarriage or stillbirth is if there's no medical explanation as to why it happened in the first place. This is frustrating because you want a reason for why such a thing would happen to you and your baby. Yet sometimes there truly is no explanation for why it happened. Some women will resort to those feelings of betrayal, believing that it was their fault for the miscarriage or stillbirth happening. But the truth of the matter is that it wasn't your fault. It may be difficult to believe, but it's true- it wasn't your fault that you had a miscarriage or stillbirth.
At the end of the day, you can't dwell on losing your baby forever. It will only rip you apart inside, and make you feel like an absolute failure. Remember- you are not an absolute failure. You're a woman who unfortunately suffered a loss. If you really want to have a baby- whether it's your first or not- don't be afraid to try again. The idea of being pregnant again could be terrifying just to think about, let alone go through. But trusting your body again by getting pregnant and successfully carrying your baby to term will help heal you in ways you can't even begin to imagine.