How To Deal With Your Friends Pushing You To Have Kids

In your group of friends, you'll notice how everyone goes down their own path in life. Some will stay alone because they don't want a partner; others manage to find the person of their dreams. In the case of the latter, some will marry and others don't see that to be necessary. Finally, some people want to have kids, whereas others never want to have kids whatsoever. The main point is to respect your friends' life choices, even if you don't agree with them.

Unfortunately, some people can't seem to accept that their friends aren't at the same stage in life as them. There seems to be a small yet still growing group of women who try to push their friends to have kids, too. This is despite said friends either not being ready to have kids just yet, or not wanting to ever have kids.

It's an upsetting situation to find yourself, regardless of which side you're on. If you're a mom, you may feel alone if you happen to be the only one in your group of friends who do have kids. If you're on the other side of the issue, you feel like someone's trying to force you to do something. Having kids is a hard decision that should never be taken lightly. What gives anyone the right to tell you what to do, even if they happen to be your friend?

via Newsweek


Of course, the last thing you want is to come to blows about the matter. Each side has valid points to be made. It's hard being a mom, but it's beyond isolating if none of your friends can relate to your experiences as a parent. But no one should become a parent if they don't want to be. How can you fix this without losing your friendship?

If you're the childfree person in this situation, the best thing to do is be firm but kind in your wording. Someone demanding others to get pregnant is rude, not to mention insensitive to those quietly struggling with fertility issues. You need to tell your friend who's pushing pregnancy onto you that they need to stop. But also ask them why they're pushing the matter so much. That may help you understand her point of view, thus opening up some dialogue. But if your friend gets defensive, laughs it off or tries to make excuses for her behaviour, it's time to be even more firm in telling them to knock it off. That will help your friend see just how serious you are in getting them to stop pushing you and/or other friends to have babies when they don't want to.

The idea of having to confront a friend on a touchy subject matter may make you nervous at the prospect of accidentally starting a fight. But it's important to remember that no one- whether they're a friend of yours or not- has the right to push their life choices onto you. Standing up for yourself is never wrong, even if it's the absolute last thing you want to do.

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