To say that childbirth is a painful and uncomfortable experience would be an understatement. So, a woman was understandably upset after her husband told her to be quiet while she was giving birth to their child. In fact, his actions upset her so much that she admits it contributed to the end of their marriage.

According to The Sun, the woman shared her story in a Facebook group, although the publication chose not to release her name. She responded to a post made by a man who said he realized he no longer loved his wife when he made her carry heavy boxes upstairs on her own, leading the mother to share her own experience of when she knew she had fallen out of love with her partner.

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“When he told me to shush during labor,” she wrote. She added that, in that moment, she realized she “deserved better,” and even more, perhaps her child would be better off raised in a single-parent household than one in which the parents are unhappy. Ultimately, the mom said it took her a year to work up the courage to call off the marriage, but she credits that moment for making her certain in her decision.

Support and understanding are critical in relationships, especially when your partner is going through something difficult – like labor. The following ways can help you ensure you’re being supportive of your partner during childbirth, as Motherly suggests.

  • Ask about her preferences. Before your partner goes into labor, make sure you’ve both openly discussed what she wants and expects from the experience. Be respectful of who she wants in the delivery room, even if you don’t agree with it. Make sure you advocate for her preference on the big day.
  • Distract her from the pain. Your partner is going to be in a lot of pain during childbirth, and one of the best things you can do for her is to distract her from the growing contractions. Do anything from putting on a T.V. show, offering to give her a back or foot rub, or simply talk her through the pain.
  • Offer her your hand. This may seem like a no-brainer, but simply offering a helping hand that she can squeeze is a big deal. Not only will this distract her from the pain, but it will let her know you’re there to support her throughout.
  • Document the laboring experience. You’re both going to want to look back on the day your child came into this world, but mom is understandably going to be too busy to worry about documenting the experience. Take on the role yourself to ensure you have memories to cherish in the future.

These aren’t the only ways people can support their partners through childbirth, but it’s a good start. Make sure to ask your partner directly what you can do from them and what they want from their childbirth experience. And whatever you do, don’t tell your partner to be quiet while she’s giving birth to your child.

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Source: The Sun, Motherly