There is a club that moms of all boys seem to be a part of, and it’s probably the best kind to belong to. There’s no secret handshake to remember, no rules about what is off limits, and it comes with a huge community of women to help you survive this crazy life. Momming boys is no easy feat, and you will need support from others who have walked this path before, or can walk with you side by side.
What boy moms don’t need, however, is questions and comments from friends, family, and strangers, about their boys and their life. The most frustrating part is that it is the same ones over and over again, and you get sick of them pretty quickly in your parenting journey! Here are the ten most popular comments made and some sarcastic replies you can give in response when you’re feeling a little sassy.
10 Wow, Your Hands Are Full!
Wow, your hands are full! This is the number one comment moms of all boys hear on a day-to-day basis. Whether you have two or six boys, you will receive this comment anytime you go out in public, especially if they’re close in age. It seems to be more common with moms of three boys in particular, as you literally do not have enough hands at that point! The best response to this quip is definitely, “You should see my heart!” Hands full, heart full.
9 Are You Going To Try For a Girl?
Can you believe the audacity of people that ask if you’re going to try for a girl? It must feel awful as a little boy to constantly hear your mom be asked if she’s going to try for a girl, as if her boys aren’t good enough. The worst timing by far is while having an ultrasound for your third baby, finding out it’s a third boy, and then in the next breath being asked by the ultrasound tech if you’re going to try for a girl. This can be absolutely heart wrenching, and is completely inappropriate. The best response for this question is, “My boys are everything I need, thank you for asking!” Don’t forget to add the side-eye for dramatic effect.
8 You Poor Thing!
You poor thing! More common for parents who have their babies close together, but certainly one that is brought up a lot with moms of all boys. Raising boys is no easy feat of course, but these mamas are not looking for your pity.
Every child is perfect just the way they are and their sex has nothing to do with it. Boy moms are strong and proud, and they’d like to be supported, not pitied. Try replying with, “Yes I know, my heart just breaks thinking about giving all these handsome men away to their partners one day!” They’ll know you didn’t like their tone but you can stay completely cordial.
7 How Do You Feed Them All?
Ah, a question some boy moms probably ask themselves on a daily basis. How in the heck will I feed all these children? While it is a valid question, it certainly isn’t one these mamas want to hear from strangers. A quick, “I’m honestly not sure, would you like to help?” should make commenters stop in their tracks. And if you’re asking yourself, maybe it’s time to start a career as a chef!
6 I Hope You Like (Insert Sport Name Here)!
Society as a whole has progressed in the last few decades in terms of gender roles, but sports still seem to be thought of as a boy thing with the older generations. People love to tell boy moms that they hope they like hockey, or baseball, or any other sport they might find themselves watching every week for the next 15 years. Whether it’s true or not, “I love whatever makes them happy,” is a perfect way to shut down this snide remark.
5 Good Luck With Their Girlfriends!
There is a well-known stereotype that moms tend to hate their sons’ girlfriends/wives. While this likely isn’t true for the majority of families, it still seems to be something that gets brought up when you’re a mom of all boys. Wishing a mama good luck with the girlfriends not only shames the boys for potentially making bad partner choices, and minimizes the mother’s ability to be open and loving to her son’s choice of significant other, but also assumes all boys end up in straight relationships. Try, “I’m sure they will choose lovely partners of whatever gender suits them, thank you for the encouragement.” Purposeful sarcasm tends to be a winner in these situations.
4 Your Husband is So Lucky!
While many of these comments play on the unluckiness of the mom, there are also some that ooze congratulations for the dad. Assuming that the boys’ father must love not having girls can feel downright icky, with quips like “Your husband is so lucky.” Many men absolutely love the idea of having little princesses to spoil, and may be saddened to not get to experience that. “Their Dad loves them because they’re his children, not because they’re boys.” is a good way to shut down this logic.
3 You Must Live In A Zoo!
Children are innately boisterous, loud, and messy, and while it truly may feel chaotic at times, it also makes your home feel alive. It doesn’t matter if it’s laughter or arguing, the sounds of little boys throughout the house are something you will one day miss.
Do not let these busy-body commenters make you feel badly about your season of life. The perfect response to quips about living in a zoo is, “Some days it’s a zoo, but one day it’ll be an empty nest, so I try to enjoy what each day brings me.”
2 How Do You Stay Sane?
Sometimes people’s questions are purely out of curiosity and not meant to be snide. Asking how a boy mom stays sane is probably one of those questions, and likely comes from other parents who have less children, less boys, or no boys at all, often while watching yours tumble around. While you could easily give them a truthful answer about coffee, coffee, and more coffee, sometimes it’s fun to tease them a little. Something like, “I’m the Queen of the house, all my boys live to please me,” usually does the trick!
1 Bless Your Heart!
Bless your heart. While the sentiment in-and-of itself is kind-natured, what the speaker is really saying is that you need to be blessed to survive this life you’ve been given. While they may not be wrong, this certainly isn’t the message mamas of multiple boys need to be hearing. Encouragement and support is much more helpful, and a reply like, “I am quite blessed, aren’t I?” will likely have them sticking their foot in their mouths. Having all boys should be seen as a blessing, not a curse, and hopefully responding like this may make them think twice about saying it again to someone else.
While this certainly isn't a full list of every question and comment an all-boy mom receives, it will give you a good idea of what to expect and how to reply without going crazy. Having a house full of boys is truly magical, and honestly hard, but one day your friends will have teen girls and you'll be sitting back watching their brand of chaos instead! It all comes full circle, no matter what your family dynamic is, and being kind is the best way to support all mamas in all walks of life.