It's another late one, moms. But this time, it's not because my kid ate my homework. No, actually both kids were relatively well-behaved. Shep only needed one timeout, and Rory slept for about three and a half hours! Wow! Thanks, kids. Mama really needed the break today.
I'm not really sure what's going on, but I've had chronic headaches for the last two weeks. It feels like sinus pressure but I don't seem to be having any of the typical sinus issues. Today I reached my limit. My eyes were burning, my ears were ringing, and my head felt like it was going to explode. In a moment of weakness, I texted my husband and asked him to come home early. By early, I mean about 45 minutes early. I was actually really proud of myself for lasting as long as I did before I threw in the towel.
Even though he got home early, I still had to nurse my daughter through the rest of the night. Because even when my husband can give me a break from being responsible for the kids, I don't get to fully take a step back. I'm a mom. I don't get sick days.
Worst case scenario, everyone in the family is sick at the same time. Count my husband out for this one - he's basically a manchild when he has the sniffles. To his credit, he rarely gets the sniffles, so he's rarely a manchild. But when it happens? Oh, buddy! My own kids are less whiny when they're sick. They might become stage five clingers, but they don't get more dependent on me to sustain them and their basic needs. My husband, who is usually my partner and helps out when things go wrong, becomes incapable of pitching in.
If it sounds like I'm complaining, it's probably because I feel a little bitter. The last few weeks, I've been dealing with chronic pain. For a person without anxiety issues, that's a lot - but when I add in my pre-existing postpartum anxiety, it becomes a really tenuous balance. I need a break. I need someone to care for my children so that I can go to the doctor, unencumbered, and try to figure out what's wrong. I need to figure out what kind of painkillers will be effective but won't destroy my stomach. Ibuprofen does nothing. Even Excedrin migraine is barely taking the edge off, but it is definitely making me feel like I'm growing an acid lab in my gut.
Today I needed a sick day. This mom job has the best benefits and the worst benefits. I get zero time off, no sick days, no major holidays, no weekends, and most depressingly - no pay. But it's a barter system - I don't get money, I get hugs. My son runs up to kiss me just because he's feeling happy and safe. My tiny baby daughter smiles at me with the brightest twinkle in her eye. And their appreciation is almost always enough to motivate me to keep trudging through the pain. But this time? This time, I really do need a sick day. And I'm out of luck.
Have you ever dealt with a chronic pain condition? What helped you feel better? Has anyone ever given you a sick day from your mom job? Tell me on Twitter @pi3sugarpi3.