When you have a baby, you tend to be surrounded by lots of support and congratulatory messages from well-wishers, all wanting to share in the joy of your baby's birth. Friends and family members show up with the traditional casseroles and ready-made dinners to help you stay fed in this busy, chaotic time. Others send flowers or gifts to welcome the little one.
Some people have a pretty twisted sense of humor and decide instead to use that humor to draw attention to some of the funnier aspects of parenthood. While some are quite funny, there are those that perhaps take that humor a bit too far and end up coming across as awkward or resentful. Here are 10 of the most awkward new baby messages women have received.
10 Congratulations on your baby! We'll do something fun to celebrate in 18 years.
While this one is meant in good fun, there is certainly an aspect of truth to it. Once you become a parent, your social life takes a dramatic dip, and it gets a lot harder to schedule time with friends, let alone time out to celebrate.
This humorous message lets the new parents know that they're happy for the new arrival, and they will hang tight until the new parents are ready to go out and celebrate properly. It could mean they're out celebrating in a few months, once the new parents grab a babysitter. But, in reality, it could also mean that they will have to wait a good while before actually hitting the bar scene again and celebrating in style.
9 Congrats on your new alarm clock!
The sender of this message definitely hit some truth with this one. Newborn babies make the tiniest, cutest, and often loudest alarm clocks! They wake at all hours of the night, and are often up and ready to start their day in the wee hours of dawn, well before you're ready to start your own day.
This new baby message hits on the fact that you won't be needing your traditional alarm clock anymore as you've got a brand new one that is much cuter. This little alarm clock will greet you with smiles, gurgles, and likely a smelly bum in the morning!
8 Can't wait to see all your posts about the baby... said no one ever
Now, this one takes the humor to a whole new level, and it definitely crosses into the realm of awkward and resentful. Many new parents enjoy sharing their excitement and happiness on social media, posting adorable photos of their newest little addition.
Some people don't particularly enjoy the endless stream of posts about the new baby, and they have a hard time hiding this fact. Instead of being happy and supportive of the new parents, they instead decide to share their dislike for the baby posts. Not exactly the nicest way to congratulate happy new parents.
7 Congratulations on your temporarily huge boobs!
Well, this one just focuses on a humorous and true aspect of motherhood: the big boobs! Every woman will go through various physical changes throughout pregnancy and after birth, but one thing that is fairly consistent with most women is that their breasts will be larger for a while after giving birth, especially if they decide to breastfeed.
Many women are quite happy with their bigger breasts, and this congratulations message focuses on that fact. They don't last forever, and eventually a woman's breasts will be mostly back to normal size. Enjoy the bigger boobs while they last, ladies!
6 Can you believe it?/I know it sounds dumb/That a kid could come out/Of a hole in your bum!
This particularly poetic message is compliments of YeaOhGreetings.etsy.com and has a wonderful Dr. Seuss ring to it. It is guaranteed to make the receiver chuckle, while simultaneously congratulating them for completing one of life's most difficult tasks - childbirth.
Childbirth is no easy feat, and this message pays heed to the enormous accomplishment of the mother in a delightfully humorous way. You can't go wrong with a little Dr. Seuss-inspired humor to say, "Way to go!"
5 Does this mean we won't hang out anymore?
This message might be said with humor, but there may be a ring of truth to it as well. Some friends may be a bit concerned that this precious little bundle will take away from their time with you. And, truth be told, they're right! Your social life will diminish significantly once you become a parent, and you won't have nearly the same amount of time for your friends, at least not right at the beginning.
That being said, real friends are supportive of this fact and do not choose to lay a guilt trip on you for it. Instead, they show up with a casserole dish and a large coffee for you, and they spend time getting to know your precious little one. So, although this message is likely meant in humor, hopefully it won't be an on-going comment being made by the same friends. If it is, choose new friends.
4 Congratulations on your new baby. Sympathies are with your vagina at this time.
This is also compliments of YeaOhGreetings.etsy.com. They certainly know how to make a painful situation a humorous one! Any woman who has gone through labor knows what rough shape their lady bits are in after giving birth. The new mom is likely wearing frozen maxi pads and dreading that first postpartum poop.
So, while it's an exciting and happy time to welcome your baby to the world, this message takes a moment to share some sympathy for the poor vagina and the trauma it's been through. Definitely a message that would make a new mom LOL!
3 Congrats on making a mini human
This is kind of an odd message to send, despite the fact that they're pointing out the obvious. Maybe that's why it's a bit odd. Yes, you created a tiny human, this is true. It just seems like a rather strange way of congratulating a new mom on her precious new baby.
That baby is definitely a mini human, but there are other ways to congratulate new parents. Something about calling your new baby a tiny human makes it sounds as though you've completed the final stages of some random experiment, and voilà, you've created a tiny human. Experiment successful (insert eye roll here).
2 Have fun with that
This message blows right past awkward, speeds by resentful, and lands somewhere in between "jerk" and "not a friend." It's a comment you'd expect from perhaps a teenage boy who's in the midst of playing his favorite video game and can't peel his eyes away long enough to come up with something better.
If you receive this message from an actual grown up friend, you might want to rethink that friendship. While parenthood is definitely full of challenges and hardships, as this attempt at humor is likely focusing on, it is also full of love and happiness. It should be the latter that you focus on when sending a congratulatory message, rather than the former.
1 Congrats on being the DD for 9 months!
Well, it's the truth of the matter. Chances are, you've been the Designated Driver for the past 9 months, as you wouldn't have been indulging in alcoholic beverages throughout your pregnancy (at least not many of them, that's for sure!).
Instead of focusing on the new baby or the labor you went through, this funny message focuses on some of the other elements of pregnancy, like being sober for 9 months and being the DD for everyone else. Perhaps once you're able to escape for a night out on the town, you'll be able to have a drink or two and let someone else be the DD for a change!