People are under the impression that stay-at-home-mom just stay at home all day and play with their kids. I have been asked things like, "Are you still mooching off your husband?" and I have also heard, "well, aren't you just wasting your education?" The only people who know how much a stay-at-home mother does is if they have been a SAHM themselves. SAHM's are in charge of taking their kids to school, to help with homework, take them to all of the activities, clean the house, do the dishes, keep up with the laundry, run errands, grocery shop, meal plan, and some mothers even work from home! It is essential for SAHM to learn how to juggle it all and keep their sanity all at the same time. Moms are constantly trying to master the art of productivity.
- To-Do Lists: Make sure you make to-lists to keep yourself focus and motivated to keep yourself going. Don't beat yourself up if you don't accomplish everything on your list. Being a stay-at-home mother is hard and there are going to be days that things are really hard and the kids are acting out more than usual so don't give yourself mom-guilt for not completing the list. Many people get very stressed out when they are looking at a huge list of things to do so it is important to start off where you are comfortable with. Don't just write on your list everything that you have ever wanted to accomplish. Follow the 1-3-5 rule. Think about one big thing, three medium things, and five small things that you want to get done during the day.
- Set Timers: As a stay-at-home mother you have to make sure you are flexible and you have to ensure that you are not spending too much time on one project. Your kids want to spend time with you and they're a lot of children who will happily watch television all day if you let them. It is much better if you set timers and stop what you are doing and spend time doing something else. You can read to your kids, play with them, or do something fun that is not on the list. This will give you a break and will allow you to have more energy and motivation to get going back on the other things you need to do around the house.
- Take breaks while you can: If you see an opportunity that you can take a break from all responsibilities and browse through Instagram and Tiktok then that is what you should do! You are trying to get through this whole mama thing and you can't stay sane if you aren't taking care of yourself too!
- Make Daily, Weekly, and Monthly Goals: Women sometimes lose their sense of self when they become a mother. Every single day seems to be only about the children. As a mother myself I know that I am constantly putting my family first which is hard because then I sometimes lose me. I don't want to lose myself. In order to help you maintain your individuality, you need to make personal daily, weekly, and monthly goals. The goals can be financial, home projects, educationally, physically, or even spiritual goals. Your daily to-do lists can reflect your attempt to achieve those long-term goals.
- Do the least appealing task first: The best way to be productive is to get through the worst task first. People sometimes make the mistake of pushing off the least favored task because they don't want to do it but then they just keep dreading it. Their day is stressful because they keep thinking about that daunting task that is haunting them. Just do that task now! This idea is based on the saying, "Eat the Frog." Mark Twain once said “If it’s your job to eat a frog, it’s best to do it first thing in the morning. And if it’s your job to eat two frogs, it’s best to eat the biggest one first.” The "frog" is the thing on your last that you do not want to do but you know you have to do it. So all day you are dreading the idea of having to do that task. If you knew you had to eat a frog than you should eat that first so it doesn't ruin your whole day thinking about it! Once you have accomplished that task then you feel like you can do anything. It gives you more motivation to get things done.
- Don't start off the day with social media: One of the biggest time wasters in today's modern society is social media and screens everywhere. Many people turn over and the first thing that they do is check their phones. They check to see their social media accounts, email, and any text messages that they have left. It is very easy to get trapped in the rabbit hole of social media posts, articles, and even debates. One of my biggest time wasters right now is Tik Tok. There is just constantly new material and it is very easy to waste a lot of time there because you never "catch up" and there is an endless amount of videos. Try not to wake up and look at your phone because you will not start off on a good foot. A study from IDC Research made this very clear. About 80% of smartphone users check their mobile devices within 15 minutes of waking up each morning. The research shares that, "by checking social media, email, or messaging right after waking up, you let other people’s opinions, requests, and advertising into your mind, which pollutes your thinking." Experts explain that "your thoughts, ideas, and focus are immediately hijacked by the new messages, emails, and notifications that you’ve received. In other words, your mind will be occupied with other people’s agenda — not your own. Instead of starting your day proactively focusing on your own goals, you’re being forced to react to other people’s stuff."
Keep doing what you are doing mama! You are doing great. Don't try to do it all because you are just going to drive yourself crazy!