There are a lot of things people need to know before they decide to have a child, especially if they are new to the whole parenting thing. Babies change nearly every part of a person’s life, and there are some times when parents are surprised at how much their life changed between the time before having kids and the time after they have kids.
Sometimes people consider having children before getting married. Other times, they do not plan on getting married at all. While having a child before marriage is totally fine, there are some things everyone needs to know before they make their decision.
10 Pro: Unmarried Parents Won’t Be Lonely
If it seems like there are more unmarried parents than there used to be, that is because it is true. Those who choose to have a baby without getting married first will not have any trouble finding others who are in a similar situation.
A long time ago, having a family before marriage was not considered socially acceptable. But these days, things are much different. Even people who are over 50 are choosing to live with their partners without getting married. This is awesome for those who wish to remain unmarried since they’re more likely to find friends whom they can relate to.
9 Con: There Are Legal Reasons To Marry Before Having A Child
People who have babies when they are unmarried could face some unpleasant legal issues, which is never fun. Anyone who wishes to do this should do a bit of research before they make their decision because they need to check out what the laws concerning this type of thing are like in the area they live in.
In short, those who are married usually do not have as many legal hoops to jump through as the couples who are not when it comes to having kids. Unwed parents might have issues when it comes to things like taxes, and adoption.
8 Pro: Since It Is Becoming More Normal, The Pressure To Get Married Isn’t As Strong
The pressure for a couple to get married when they learn that they are expecting a baby is not as strong as it used to be, so single parents will probably face less judgment than they used to, which is great. Being a parent is hard enough, so added pressure from those around them to do something they do not want to do is not beneficial for them at all.
There is nothing wrong with having a child out of wedlock, and there are definitely lots of people choosing to do that these days. People are not as strict about this as they used to be.
7 Con: It Can Have A Negative Impact On The Child
Kids who are born into this type of situation are more likely to deal with certain issues than married parents are. In the cases of some unwed parents, the child is only able to rely on one of their incomes, which means that they are at more of a risk for having to deal with poverty than other kids are.
There is also evidence that shows that children whose parents are together, but not married, may have some unfortunate behavioral problems to face. That can be hard on the child, as well as their family. These are definitely things that should be taken into consideration before having a child.
6 Pro: You Can Still Have A Happy Family
Couples who do not want to get married can still have the same happy life that married couples can have. Marriage does not guarantee that a couple will stay together. The only thing that can really do that is how people feel about the person they are in a relationship with, and how they treat them.
That means that those who are choosing to live together and forego getting married can still have a happy, long-lasting, and successful relationship, which is definitely something that is good for children to be around. Plenty of unmarried couples have a healthy family life.
5 Con: It Can Be Hard To Decide What The Child’s Last Name Will Be
Deciding on what a child’s last name should be when they are born to unwed parents can be a little tricky. In most cases, the child takes on the same last name as one of their parents, but this is not always the case, especially for couples who are not married when the baby is born.
While some unwed couples still choose to do things that way, there are other couples who like the idea of giving their kids a combination of both of their last names. Though they were married, a good example of this is the Jolie-Pitt family.
4 Pro: Single Parents Would Not Be Trapped In Unhealthy Marriages
Kids who live with parents that are not married do not have to witness their parents living in an unhealthy marriage. That is a great thing because growing up in that environment can have very long-lasting effects on a person.
Some parents choose to stay together because they feel it is best for the child. But if their marriage is not strong, it is not beneficial for the child in any way. Situations like this one could cause the child involved in it to have low self-esteem since little ones absorb negative emotions like sponges absorb liquids. They also may not feel comfortable in their own homes.
3 Con: Dating Can Be Really Hard For Single Parents
Those who are not with their child’s other parent will likely find that dating is much harder in cases like this. It is actually kind of difficult for everyone that is involved. Those who date single parents might have a hard time if they get too close to that person’s child because that can actually make a potential breakup harder.
These things can be pretty hard for children as well. Another reason why this is not ideal is that it can be hard to find time to date anyone. Kids keep people very busy, and parents don’t usually want to bring their kids along on their dates.
2 Pro: It Can Help Parents Be Better Prepared In Case They Do Get Married
Having a baby can put a strain on a couple’s relationship, so if they see what it is like to have one before they get married, that will allow them to avoid being in a potentially unsatisfactory marriage. Even if a child is not in the picture, living together is a great way for people to see what their life will be like if they get married.
If they do not like it, parting ways is a lot easier for them to do if they are not already married. Being more prepared for marriage is never a bad thing, especially if children are in the picture.
1 Con: Unmarried Parents Are More Likely To Split Up When The Child Is Still Young
Unwed couples are actually more likely to call it quits on their relationship before their children are 12 years old. They are almost twice as likely to do that than couples who are married.
There are lots of potential reasons why this could be true. There are some people who think that cohabitating is not as permanent of a thing as marriage is, which makes it easier for them to exit a relationship like that one. But no matter what the cause is, children always have a really tough time when their parents decide to part ways with each other.
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