Being pregnant is one of the most amazing experiences in life. Upon confirming your pregnancy, you now need to move to the bit where you have to share the news with your loved ones. For a majority of women out there, this is an occasion that they totally look forward to. To them, sharing the news with everyone, having tearful grandparents-to-be, having friends getting excited as if this were their own child, and basically just enjoying the attention that follows is a true classic.
However, the entire act of sharing the news is not all that exciting for every pregnant woman out there. There are plenty of reasons why some women may feel a tad bit on the hesitant side when faced with the challenge of sharing the news about their pregnancy with family members and friends. For instance, the expectant mother may be too young and is scared of telling her family about being pregnant worried that they will think she isn’t the right age to bear a child. Or, maybe she isn’t all that financially stable and is worried what people will think about her in this regard when she announces the pregnancy. Well, if you are stuck in such a situation and anticipate a bit of hostility towards your pregnancy, then here are a few tips that will help you cope with your fear:
7 Tip # : Pre-judging people isn’t the way to go about things
As humans, we all have this tendency to surprise others. Seriously, you never know for sure how someone is going to react to something. This even holds true for our parents – back in college, I told them that me and my friends are forming a band, thinking they would be completely disappointed and devastated with the news. Their reaction? Hah, they actually encouraged me and appreciated that I was for once about to do something that truly interested me! Yes, that’s how surprising people can get at times. It’s just this thing we have with pre-judging people that clouds our decisions and thoughts, thereby triggering undue stress for us alone in the long run.
Now, when you think it is time for you to make the announcement about your pregnancy, stop pre-judging your loved ones. Seriously, when you finally give them the big news, you are bound to have most of them react in ways that you least expected them to. The aunt you thought would be least thrilled after hearing about your pregnancy may completely take you by surprise by being filled with pure joy about it. On the other hand, some people that you initially thought will be most happy and excited about your pregnancy may appear to be less than thrilled about the whole thing. Honestly speaking, there is not a single way on Earth for you to be able to predict just how your family members, friends or even colleagues will react to the news of your pregnancy.
By pre-judging people, you will in fact just put yourself under unwanted and unneeded stress. All that anxiety isn’t good for you and the baby alike, so instead of making up your mind that people will react to my pregnancy in so and so manner, just let things go. With people’s tendency to surprise others, there is a very good chance that they will not react as negatively to your pregnancy as you thought they would – give it a try; it is completely worth it. If luck has it, you will receive all the love and anticipation that you have been dreaming of ever since you found out that you are expecting.
6 Tip # : Relax and tell them when you are ready for it
Of course, relaxing is something easier said than done and I completely understand. However, considering that you are in the first trimester of your pregnancy, I am sure you have a whole lot to worry about already, so adding things to it isn’t going to do you any favors.
See, the fact of the matter is that you cannot guess or predict how people are going to react to the news of your pregnancy. You cannot tell whether your family members and friends will be happy and thrilled or upset and angry about the situation. For this reason, there is no reason for you to worry about things like these, and obsess over what is going to happen – whatever has to happen will happen and nothing in the world can change it; not even you. Hence, instead of worrying about their reactions, start focusing 100% and put all of your energy towards taking care of yourself. Remember, the first trimester of pregnancy can be a pretty tough time what with all the morning sickness and staying hydrated etc. and instead of putting yourself through undue stress, take the time to look after yourself. Here are a few things that you should do:
- Eat well – have lots and lots of fruit and other healthy food items
- Get as much rest as possible
- Avert those negative thoughts – keep yourself busy with something creative
- Enjoy the simple fact that you have a secret that just you and your partner/husband know
Now, the next thing for you to do is to work out the right time to break this special news to everyone. In a traditional setting, women prefer waiting for the first trimester to come to an end before doing so. This is because miscarriages are most likely to take place in the first trimester, hence they prefer waiting for it to pass. However, there is no need for you to follow this practice – just work out whatever the right time is for you to tell your loved ones that you are expecting. You will of course have to tell them one day, so why wait it out?
5 Tip # : Talk to your partner – get emotional support from him
Irrespective of whether your pregnancy is planned or unplanned, it is highly recommended for you to get into a bit of an intimate conversation with your partner, particularly when breaking the news to him. To be honest, no matter how good or bad the overall circumstances are, it is your partner/husband who should be the first to know about your pregnancy. I mean, it’s such a festive occasion and even if it comes as a shock to your partner/husband, the joy that will entail is simply going to take away any hesitations that the two of you might have.
A majority of women find it rather tempting to call up their mom or best friend when they get that big fat positive test result. However, considering that your partner/husband is the one who will be the father/parent of the baby, it is he who deserves to receive the good news before anyone else. Seriously, the bond that the two of you will share during that moment is simply going to be marvelous. While you are at it, make sure that you have an honest conversation with him and let out all of your true feelings to him. In case you are anxious about times to comes, tell him about it while also mentioning just how happy you are to be expecting a precious angel. Pregnancies entail 9-months of being pure emotional for women and your partner will be there to provide you with all the support that you need. During your conversation, the two of you may also consider talking about things like your chosen birthing way, finances and a whole lot more.
The best part about having such a conversation with your significant other is that you will be able to share your concerns about the announcement with him. Once you start talking about your feelings, there is a good chance that you two will work a way out. In such an emotional time, you need to have a strong support system and your partner/husband will provide you with all the support that you need knowing that you are worried about the announcement.
4 Tip # : Positive people are who you should hang out with
Now, there are two types of people who are going to be around you during your pregnancy: those who are completely thrilled about it, and those who, well, let’s just suffice by saying are less than excited about the whole thing. In order to pull through this tough time and to have a stress-free pregnancy, it is highly recommended for you to spend as much time as possible with those that have a more ‘positive’ approach towards things. People who don’t make you feel as good about being pregnant should be avoided as much as possible.
However, this does not mean that you should simply just cut away from such negative people. No, severing ties isn’t the way to go about things. Instead, what you should do is to just focus on spending less time in their company. See, the thing with pregnancies is that as exciting as these can get, these are equally stressful. Now, if you continue to surround yourself with people who have negative feelings towards your pregnancy, you will be adding to the stress you feel due to the less glamorous side of pregnancy. Remember, in order to have a safe and healthy pregnancy, it is necessary for you to keep stress and worries at a minimum. If this implies spending less time in the company of people giving off a negative vibe, then so be it – nothing in this world is more important than your baby, is it?
With that, if you are wondering how to work out which people are good for you and which aren’t, then there’s a way to go about it. In order to do so, it is vital for you to pay ample attention to how you feel about yourself and your pregnancy when they are around you. If you feel good about yourself and your pregnancy around them, then these are the people that you should spend the most time with. As long as they are bringing joy to your life, they’re good. Anyone who makes you feel otherwise needs to go – your interaction with them should be kept to a bare minimum!
3 Tip # : Make a gentle announcement and remember this is all about you
When you finally decide to break the news to people, it is necessary for you to bear in mind that there might be a few who will react rather negatively to it. For this reason, it is vital for you to be as sensitive and gentle as possible when having THE conversation about it. For instance, if you think your parents might not have a positive reaction towards your pregnancy, then be subtle when telling them about it – going on live television isn’t the best idea in such a scenario. One of the best things for you to do in this regard is to make the announcement as private as possible for each and everyone involved. Instead of breaking the news to them on Facebook, visit them and have a little private conversation with them. This will also play a significant role in making things a bit more special. Also, if you think that the news might be overly shocking for someone, then tell them in advance that you will be dropping by to make a special announcement. This way, they will know that something major has happened in your life, and may refrain from making any hurtful or shock-induced comments that might spoil everything for you.
Now, no matter what sort of responses you receive, you need to bear in mind the fact that this is all completely about you and not them. The only thing about them related to your pregnancy is their reaction to it. Yes, it is natural for you to get upset if they respond negatively, but you need to keep a clear head for the well-being of your baby because eventually, that’s all that matters. Amidst all of their negativity, focus on just how much joy your baby will bring to you, and how motherhood will forever change your life with such a gorgeous baby getting developed inside you. Nothing anyone says should have an impact on how you feel about being pregnant. In the end, it is just your feelings and thoughts that matter, so to have a safe pregnancy, stay as positive as possible and things are bound to work out.
2 Tip # : Your feelings need to be made clear, but refrain from getting defensive
Your pregnancy’s announcement is good news and you need to make it clear to everyone that it is just that. In order for them to get as excited as you expect them to be about your pregnancy, it is necessary for them to know just how happy you are about it. For this reason, make sure that you tell them how excited you are, and how you just can’t wait to have your bundle of joy in your arms. The reason behind this is simple: happiness is extremely contagious and the mere act of sharing your joy with those you love is sure to bring a smile on their faces.
When you make your feelings of happiness clear to everyone, there is a good chance that they will realize just how important this is to you. This way, instead of reacting in a negative manner, they will take a more subtle approach to things even if they don’t approve of it. As long as they know that this means the world to you right now, they will not respond as negatively.
While you are at it, I realize that receiving negative reactions towards something that is so important to you is not easy to deal with. This particularly holds true in cases where you receive such distasteful responses from people who you wanted to be over the moon for you. However, this is not the right time for you to take a defensive stance, or take steps that will forever sever the relationship that you share with such individuals. For instance, if someone is angry over the situation, don’t bother getting into a screaming match with them. Not only will this trigger more trouble for you, it will also wreak havoc over your stress levels. So how should you go about dealing with such a situation? Well, the best thing to do is to clarify how saddened their reaction has made you feel and just excuse yourself from the conversation. As long as they know that their words and attitudes have hurt you, there is simply no need for you to hang around and put up with their negativity.
1 Tip # : Give everyone a bit of time
Alright, so after carefully planning things out, you have finally mustered up the courage to tell everyone about your pregnancy. But it is not necessary at all that things will go according to plan. You might have thought that your mother will be ecstatic about your pregnancy, but she turns out to be furious with you. When you thought that your in-laws will be against the pregnancy and will have nothing but rude comments to pass over it, they turn out being completely over the moon with joy about it. There’s nothing in this world that you can be sure of and people’s responses and reactions are part of that list.
Considering that a particular loved one of yours is not as pleased to learn about your pregnancy as you wanted him/her to be, try reasoning with him/her for a while and see how things go. Tell them that you are extremely excited about the pregnancy and are just waiting for the day that your precious little angel will make an arrival. With that, there is a good chance that they will come around, and even if they don’t change their stance, they will not say something overly hurtful about your pregnancy.
However, if they simply aren’t interested in the news and continue to remain negative about it, just give them a bit of time to accept it and get used to it. Perhaps they are in a bit of a shock right now, and in such a case, talking to them, or trying to make them see your side of the story right away is not going to work. For this reason, it is best for you to just give them a bit of time so they can come to terms with the happenings in your life. While you are at it, make sure that you don’t abandon them and keep all lines of communication open so they can get in touch with you in time. When they contact you, do not bring up how hurt you were with their response – we all make mistakes, and all of us deserve a second chance at things.