“Jugging the Jenkins” blogger Tiffany Jenkins had an October 22 vlog about her recent two-day stay at a hotel trying to give herself a minute to catch up with emotions and anxiety after feeling overwhelmed from life’s responsibilities.
I have spent nights away from my kids before. I have gone on vacation with my husband or overnight stays away for a wedding. Most recently, my husband and I went on a tent camping trip while we explored the Trans Wisconsin Adventure Trai,l which is essentially an off-roading trip (but we took our SUV).
I miss my kids and my husband when I am gone, so I don't often strive to spend any more time away from them than necessary unless there is a real reason, like a work trip.
This last weekend, I attended a conference for my work. The drive took me seven hours, a bit longer than I expected. I arrived the night before on Friday as I was to present at the conference the following morning. I stayed alone at the hotel. This was the first time that I had ever stayed in a hotel alone. That night, I ordered dinner in. I took a long shower; I dried my very long hair without rushing or watching a clock or baby monitor to see if someone was going to wake up soon.
I ran through my speech a couple of times to practice, but then, I watched Hulu.... for hours. I vegged out and completed relaxed without stress or guilt about the things that I should have been doing if I had been at home. For months, since the school semester started at the community college where I teach part-time, I had not been able to sit and do nothing. Once the kids go to bed on any given night, I have emails to write, papers to grade, assignments to prep, sample essays to prep or perhaps even find, and TedTalks to preview. If I am miraculously caught up with school work, there is the never-ending list of things that I need to do at home: dishes, laundry, cleaning up toys, organizing items for preschool the next day, etc.
There were no towels to fold at the hotel and no house project that needed a bit of touch up paint or another coat of poly. I was away for work reasons. There was no reason to feel guilty for being gone, so I sat and did nothing. I relished in the quiet and missed the hum of the sound machines coming through the baby monitors. I did things that night that were just for me.
I caught up on meaningless shows. I streamed episode after episode of police shows and doctor shows. I was only responsible for myself that evening, and it felt like such a relief. I needed to re-energize. I needed to refuel.
After two full nights away at the hotel, I returned home with more patience and a softer tone of voice when speaking to my kids. My two kids literally tackled me to the ground and laid on top of me laughing and smiling for twenty minutes. They had missed me. They almost never get the chance to just miss me because I am with them so much. It felt so good to be missed. It felt so good to take care of their mama. I am grateful for the work excuse to take a couple of nights away because, without it, I would not have chosen to spend the time away from them.
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🔹Ох уж эти пчёлки🔹 ⠀ Я очень люблю продукты марки @celimax.global Сегодня расскажу о своих впечатлениях от тканевой маски с пчелиным ядом и кислотами. ⠀ Эта маска одновременно оказывает эффект пилинга, питает и обновляет кожу. Пропитана очень хорошо слегка жёлтоватой эссенцией. Пока маска на лице ощущается небольшое покалывание, но результат мне очень нравится 👍 ⠀ Сразу после снятия присутствует липкость. Через 10минут ее вообще нет. Кожа приятная, гладкая 😍 Я бы рекомендовала сделать эти маски курсом, например, 5 масок с промежутками 1-2 дня между каждой. ⠀ В составе также экстраты винограда, яблока, сахарного тростника, прополис, бета-глюкан. ⠀ Мне маска очень понравилась. Я попробовала одну и сразу приобрела целую упаковку по выгодной цене в магазине @roseroseshop.official 1063р. за 10шт. (Это выгоднее, чем брать поштушно, так как 1шт. стоит 136р) __ 🔹Oh, those little bees 🔹 ⠀ I really like @celimax.korea brand products. Today I will talk about a fabric mask with bee venom and acids. ⠀ This mask simultaneously exfoliates, nourishes and renews the skin. The mask is impregnated very well. When the mask is on the face, a slight tingling sensation is felt. The result of this mask I really like 👍 ⠀ Immediately after removal, stickiness is present. After 10 minutes, she is not at all. The skin is pleasant, smooth 😍 I recommend making these masks a course, for example, 5 masks with an interval of 1-2 days. ⠀ The composition also includes extracts of grapes, apples, sugarcane, propolis, beta-glucan. ⠀ I really liked the mask. I tried one and immediately bought the whole package at a bargain price in the @roseroseshop.official store $16.52 for 10pcs. (This is more profitable than taking by the piece, as 1 pc. costs $2.13) ⠀ #beauty_lebedeva #celimax #roseroseshop #sheetmask #beevenom #propolis #kbeautyblog #kbeautyreview #koreanskincare #тканеваямаска
I have another work conference coming up in a few months which I am very much so looking forward to. This time I will fly to Austin, Texas for three nights. My plan for this trip is similar. I will complete my work responsibilities alone knowing that my children are at home and safe with their father. I will choose things to eat based on my choices and preferences as opposed to those of my toddler and preschooler. I will fill my free time with activities that fit my interests whether that means exploring the city, getting a pedicure, or watching Hulu; that time will be important to fulfilling me as an educated adult with interests separate from her children and husband. I will return from my next work trip with an again renewed sense of purpose to be a great mom after a brief breather.
Shay Mitchell was recently criticized for attending an event days after the birth of her child. Maybe we just need to stop shaming moms for self-care and then wonder why moms are struggling with mental health. Shay Mitchell made a choice to enjoy herself for a few hours with friends which is likely skewed in the media because her friends are celebrities. If a mom wants to have an evening with her friends, or an evening alone in a hotel room, maybe we all need to respect the fact that this is what is best for her, her mental health, and ultimately her ability to parent her child.