People talk about how we live in a divided nation, and, while it's not ideal, it totally makes sense. Of course it’s difficult to agree on any opinion or perspective when we’re living in a nation so large we’re not all even sharing the same definition of winter (not to rub it in anyone’s face, but it’s difficult to imagine snow or thawed and refrozen slushy sidewalks in this gorgeous sunny SoCal landscape).
From coast to coast, there are three different time zones! That’s a big old chunk of land! The intent of this pointing out of a very obvious fact is that from region to region, there are different parenting concerns. Each state, even those tiny, teensie-weensie East Coast states, has its own specific questions that are the talk of the town. And Google is there to record our respective zeitgeists — if anyone’s worried about it, Google has stats on it. Not only are we made unique by how intense or otherwise our Autumns are (Fall means the palm trees wilt a little, right? And breaking out the heavy shorts?), but we’re also made even more unique by what the most googled parenting question in our state is. Dive in!
50 California: Can Kids Drink Kombucha?
Fine, the exception that proves the rule. California may seem like a sun-drenched cartoon to more landlocked states, and this question won’t help that image. The most Googled question pertaining to parenting in California is… "can kids drink kombucha?” Ugh, look — it happens. Can they? Important to know. Not that any child should drink kombucha — it’s very gross and not a trait that makes anyone want to befriend you. The question isn’t if children can drink kombucha so much as why they are doing that.
49 Hawaii Has A Lot Of Questions About Baby Shark
Hawaii’s number one question is more of a karaoke request than a full-fledged parenting concern. The top Google search is, verbatim, these words: “Baby Shark” by Pinkfong!" Everyone sing along: “Baby shark, doo doo doo doo doo…” It’s that sleep-deprived parent brain that knows some of the words from a song they could swear they heard, but not enough to make a logical Google search. There’s a shark and some harmonies in the chorus — if you can remember anything else from that most recent birthday party, you must not have children.
48 New York Wants To Know What's Going On In Baby's Head
Looking at that tiny human you created and wondering who they’ll become and what they even think when they see their surroundings, you have to wonder (as New York does), "do babies dream”? Do they? And of what? Animals typically dream as a way to cement experiences and better remember habits or responses to situations. Is that what babies dream of? Or are they also dreaming of weird situations involving celebrities and floors made of foam? It's one or the other — it has to be!
47 Tennessee Feeling Insecure
There’s the gorgeous state when a child is pre-verbal and almost everything about their personality is only an imagined fate. And then there are all the ugly details of a human becoming a human and as we all know, the really messy bits get taken out on parents. So when Tennessee broke down in desperation and asked, "why does my child not like me?”… they weren’t alone, even if they felt that way. Childhood is full of emotions that are too big to fit in those tiny feelings and they get taken out on those closest to them.
46 Texas Must Be Seeing A Lot Of Divorces Happening
Laws are laws, and a relationship falling apart doesn’t change any of that. When there’s a kid, there’s a lot of paperwork to come. It’s a less romantic view, but it’s also true. That’s all an indirect way to say that since Texas’s most common parenting Google search is "child support,” those Texans should get more specific. There are plenty of laws to get acquainted with, and there’s no way around it. That question is a great start, and there’s a lot more distance to go.
45 Florida: Can Kids See Ghosts?
Weird stuff happens in Florida, and that’s why the rest of the nation loves that pan-shaped state. What will alligators get away with next? What did an upset man in a crowded McDonalds do this time? I’m on board for any of it. The point is that Florida parents are preparing for whatever the future has to bring: "kids see ghosts.” It happens, as we’ve all seen in almost every movie involving ghosts in the last decades. So why not find out real early on if your toddler is about to get weird?
44 Illinois Is Curious About Kids In Cages
Illinois is concerned about things they can’t see or are anywhere near and that’s why the top googled search is, "kids in cages.” That state is halfway to Canada but their concerns in parenting are far more Southern. Some issues inspire that universal spark of parental concern in all of us, and even in some non-parents who are really upset. It’s totally natural, we’re all one species for goodness sake. Let’s act like it! All our babies are equally adorable and deserve the same care!
43 Arizona Cares About Baby's Development
Oooh, it’s time to travel south from the most-Northern peak of America to a very southern end. It’s true: Arizona only became such a great climate for lizards and frying eggs on the sidewalk by being so far south. But even distance doesn’t make people all that different — we all care for our children’s development, and in Arizona, the most frequently googled question was, "What is RSV in a baby?” It sounds like SUV but isn’t. But it’s distracting to read that acronym.
42 Pennsylvania On The Fence About The Whole Baby Thing
Let’s get to it — the most googled question in Pennsylvania pertaining to parenthood is, "Should I have a baby?” Yup, that’s a question only you have the answer to. It has nothing to do with politicians or what relatives around you say or even what your partner thinks. It has to do with your body and where you’re at in life with that path of yours. If that’s the most looming question on your mind, it’s time to close the laptop and have some screen-free time alone.
41 Georgia Maybe Relying A Little Too Heavily On Baby Orajel
It’s really confusing to know how to approach the dental and oral health of a little being that has no teeth or less than a dozen. And those teeth are temporary? Look, we all lost baby teeth but it’s still a weird thing. A tooth just pops out of the hole the other one left! Who understands what happens in that weird mouth? A dentist? Whatever! Anyway, that’s why the most Googled question was, "Why was Baby Orajel recalled?” Babies health barely makes sense, so once it becomes about their dental health… Yeah, goodnight. That’s too hard.
40 North Carolina Would Like Their Children's Noses To Stop Bleeding
There was definitely that kid in elementary school who had the recurring and nonstop nosebleeds (anyone remember learning the meaning of the word cauterize? I do and it absolutely had to do with this), and apparently, plenty of those kids are actually from North Carolina. That’s why so many parents in the area searched, "why does my child have nosebleeds.” There are plenty of reasons and plenty of solutions —best of luck. Travel safe, my fellow voyager, and pack plenty of tissues.
39 New Jersey: Why Does My Child Keep Getting Lice?
There are personal problems and there are the issues afflicting all of us and there’s some overlap in that. So when New Jersey parents frantically Google search, "why does my child keep getting lice? then we’re looking at a reflection of society and of the individual. Why does your child keep getting lice, or why do all children keep getting lice in this day and age? That has a lot to do with circumstance and pillowcase but let’s read on to really get to the bottom of it.
38 Virginia Is Just So Tired
Virginia was one of the few states with a parenting question that anyone on the street could answer. “Should I nap?” Absolutely. Do that instead of asking these questions. Googling that affirmation is nowhere as productive as shutting those eyes. Any moment where someone isn’t talking to you or demanding things of you is technically, legally considered nap time. Go for it, where ever you are. Oh, you’re in public? Great, go to sleep. You earned it, so use that hoodie as a pillow.
37 Washington Wants To Have The Safest Houses
Anyone who's ever been near a baby knows they have nothing to do and spend all their mental energy getting into trouble. It’s so confusing how something so helpless could be so troublesome and yet, here we are locking cabinets and faucets off from toddlers. Washington state just wants to know, "what are the best baby proofing products in 2018?” and so do we all. What can possibly curb their mischievous ways? What can you sell me that will do that? Please.
36 Not Sure Hooters Is Family-Friendly, West Virginia
Every family has their own traditions, and it’s difficult to know when you’re just starting out what yours will be. That could be why the parents of West Virginia felt the need to ask, "do families go to Hooters” so many times. They reached their own conclusions, doubted them, saw a coupon for chicken wings, and had to ask again. Look, do families go there or does your family go there? That’s the real question. Enjoy your night out - that's what matters.
35 Massachusetts Staying On Top Of The Latest In Crib Safety
There are so many developments in childcare — whether it’s breakthroughs in child psychology or brand new must-have products and the recall of things we thought were to be trusted. There’s always something, as is always true in parenting. So it’s no big surprise that the City on the Hill just wants to know about "crib recalls.” That’s its own long night of research — plenty of small parts in cribs get recalled and someone has to stay on top of that.
34 Michigan Always On The Move With Sleeping Babies
So weird that a state where most of the coast faces frigid waters wants to know about portable cribs and getting away from it all! Just kidding — those parents probably have a whole lot of Midwest to cover. The most Googled parenting question in Michigan is "portable crib” because… well who knows where they’re coming from. We’ve all got our own stories. Some of us just want to move the crib to the warmest room during a truly frigid winter without much fuss.
33 Alabama Wants To Know Where Baby Can Sleep
The gorgeous Southern state, Alabama. Now, Alabama, what questions have you been thinking on? Oh, "Can baby sleep in a rocker?” Yeah, fair enough. That’s a solid question. Well, infants can’t sleep in car seats, but that kind of inconclusive answer is probably why Alabama parents have been doing all their research.
32 And Colorado Just Wants Baby To Go To Sleep
Colorado is the cool uncle of Midwestern states. Or just pure West? Look, it was once the wild, Wild West and a new frontier and now it’s a great place to raise a family. The adventurous becomes the scenic and safe and that’s not too bad of a trade-off. As for Colorado’s most Googled question about parenting those little ones: "Will a sleep sack help a baby sleep?” No such thing as a bad question, at least in this case.
31 Arkansas Is Super Concerned With Carseat Safety
It really is the truth that no matter our time zones or regions on the intensity of our seasons that people just want the same things. We all want safety for the ones we love and the ability to pursue what makes us happy. It gets easy to forget that with everything going on, but every parent just worries about safety. That’s why Arkansas’s most googled question makes so much sense: "What are the safest infant car seats of 2018?” Great! Do that research!
30 Wisconsin Noticed Some Babies Have Two Belly Buttons
Newborns can already have so much weird business going on with them that there’s no time to wonder about the really personalized stuff. So it’s very likely that Wisconsin just ran out of time to wonder, "why a baby has two belly buttons” and had to ask Google. No time for that question mark - the wording makes it clear that this is an interrogative. We all saw those ads for “Kyle XY” where he didn’t have a belly button and that was a lot to handle. So two buttons? Ask the Internet.
29 Connecticut Loves Free Stuff
So much of raising a child has to do with convincing children that material objects don’t matter and what really counts in life doesn’t have a price tag. But we can also be totally realistic and pragmatic here — there’s a lot of stuff involved in raising children. And stuff matters. Stuff includes diapers and running water. All are material objects worth striving towards. Anyway, Connecticut gets it. Their most googled question is, "What baby registries give free stuff?" Fair enough.
28 For Delaware, Only The Best Will Do
There are those superficial perks companies try to snag new customers with and then there are concerns about quality. Delaware got to business with their question. There’s a lot of stuff that needs to get done during pregnancy, so why not make the most of the work others will do for you? That’s why so many on the East coast were Googling, "Which is the best baby registry?”Look, there are plenty of ooey-gooey emotions that go into this stage of life, but we can be totally clear-headed about which registry is best.
27 Idaho: When Is It Safe For Baby To Sleep On Tummy?
Tummy time — let's get into it. Dive in! Do a belly flop, like a version of tummy time that involves way more skeletal growth and strength. And having a membership to a pool, knowing where a pool is or having any of the abilities to get to a pool (and crawling doesn’t count). Anyway, tummy time is relevant because Idaho’s top query has to be, "When is it safe for baby to sleep on tummy?” It’s all about tummy time, and that’s just the truth.
26 Indiana: A Certain Figure's Children
There’s nothing like seeing someone on television and then googling their backstory. That could be why Indiana is most concerned with, "[a certain figure's] children” in their Google searches that have to do with kids and parenting. Sure, his kids are absolutely adults nowadays with their own children but everybody has to start somewhere! Plus, there are probably fewer pictures of his great-grandchildren, who are probably crawling around somewhere. Seriously though, isn’t it satisfying to see a person’s face in another human being’s face?
25 Iowa Wants To Prevent SIDS At All Costs
Parenthood is all about preparing for any number of situations that may or may not arise. Will there be an apocalypse in the time between now and whenever your little one gets over their worry about the dark? Well, either way, pack in that nightlight that runs off carbon dioxide in the air. Your family might need it! That’s probably why Idaho is so concerned about, "Can SIDS be prevented.” It's all about worrying about things that may or may not happen, so you might as well prepare mentally.
24 Kansas: Which Baby Slings Are Safe?
Kansas is notoriously flat and free of trip-able hills or mountains, but parents are still concerned about how to best fasten their child to their body. That’s why the top Googled question of all parenting issues is, "Which baby slings are safe?” Which ones?! Give me deets! I want models and I want makes and I want those details on my desk by yesterday! Yeah, free up some parent’s arms and tell us which are the safest. Thanks, Google.
23 Kentucky Is Into Attachment Parenting
It’s so difficult to figure out exactly your vision for parenting. There’s what you love about your parent’s style of parenting you and what to borrow from that, there’s what to do differently that always irked you and there’s what it says to do in books and then there’s what’s even realistic on those late nights when you're so out of time and have so many chores left. That’s probably why the top search is, "attachment parenting.” What philosophy to adopt? That’s your own Google rabbit hole to fall down.
22 Louisiana: Drake Baby Mama
Not all of our parenting concerns have to do with our own immediate family. Sure, there’s our curiosities about what the neighbors are doing to have such well behaved kids and why the sedan two cars up in the drop-off lane take so long. Then there are the more removed curiosities about who celebrities make their family with or share children again. Louisiana had to know, "drake baby mama?” — which, yes, is technically barely a question — for that very reason.
21 Maine Just Wants This Flu To End, Already
It's very possible that the funniest element of a question googled about parenting is when it’s so straight-forward with absolutely no time for proper grammar or unnecessary words. It implies this total reality of having to deal with issues as they present themselves and just trying to stay ahead of that — which is impossible. That’s why Maine’s question about, "How long does flu last?” really resonates. There’s no time for articles or “the.” It’s time to return to taking care of a little kid with a runny nose and wondering how much longer will this last.
20 Maryland Wants To Know More ABC Songs For Children
Ever think that the old-fashioned alphabet song isn’t going to cut it anymore? Wait, that’s a concern in your life? Wow — goodness. How musically talented is this child? When Maryland wonders, "ABC songs for children,” it seems like messing with a good thing. Do this many parents not know the alphabet song or do they just expect a new one? I feel like the old standard will work no matter what circumstance. I just highly doubt there’s been a remix in the years since learning that one.
19 Minnesota Wants To Toss Their Infants Into The Water (But Safely)
This is a rough and tumble question if there ever was one. When Minnesota asks the Interwebs, "Are infant life jackets safe?” most of us wonder just how outdoorsy these new parents are. Where are you going swimming? And for how long? That question depends on a lot of different subjective details, like how long an infant is in water for. It’s one of those very special breeds of questions that raises even more questions, not that we’re judging ya, Minnesota.
18 Mississippi: Am I Pregnant?
The most frequently googled parenting question in Mississippi is “am I pregnant,” and there are plenty of cheap jokes we could make that we won't. If that’s a question in your life, there are much more useful ways to find out than Google. Looks, that’s rare — Google can answer almost anything. But some questions are best answered by urinating on a cheap purchase from CVS, and that’s something to be cherished. So go forth and find out, but Google can’t definitively answer that question.
17 Missouri Believes Families Belong Together
Whether it’s a fact or a movement, it’s a fairly difficult idea to argue with. Missouri’s most googled query was, "families belong together,” which sounds like a fact but is somehow a question in this day and age. If there weren’t the ethics involved of all the many and unending reasons a child shouldn’t be separated from their parents, there’s the obvious and very definitive fact that anyone other than a parent won’t take as good of care of a child. They’re safest with their own family.
16 Montana Is All About That Quick Gratification
Is this latest Google search pleading for some futuristic solution to those long nine months of waiting or just looking up the nearest and soonest movie times? Montana’s most-asked question on Google, pertaining to parenting, was "instant family.” Yes, that sounds like some weird freeze-dried invention, but it’s also a film involving Matt Damon. Take your pick, but one is way more likely than the other as far as common Google searches. Here's a hint — it's not the one that sounds like a sci-fi story no one asked for.
15 Nebraska: Baby Pigeon
Was this one a viral craze? If so, I don’t remember it. Montana clocked in as the top state searching for answers pertaining to "baby pigeon.” Okay, it’s an insightful observation that we never see baby pigeons, even if our city-stricken lives are more than populated by a fair share of the little gray doves. But why was this so common and popular? Well, baby doves are probably adorable. That feels like a safe assumption. Or this is another parenting fad.
14 Nevada Loves Baby Walkers And Just Can't Let Them Go
Again, there’s a lot of news to stay ahead of. It doesn’t matter where you’re located (unless that affects your Wifi — that will make it more difficult to stay on top of all the unending news that gets posted in the realm of parenting) but staying educated is a full-time job. So if you also have a full-time job (which is only realistic), then you’re swamped, like the rest of us. When parents in Nevada ask, "Why are baby walkers banned?” they’re asking it for all of us. Why, again? Just remind me. I know, but I forgot.
13 New Hampshire Wants To Feed The Baby Cheese
Bless North Platte, Nebraska, when they ask, "can baby eat cheese.” We’re not here to discuss the plural or singular of baby — maybe they’re asking about all babies, and maybe they’re asking about theirs. Probably the second one. Can babies eat cheese, and more important, who can’t eat cheese? Does that mean ever? Because that stuff is really good. And when can they enjoy the delight that is cheese? Okay Google, we had to ask because parenthood also involves introducing kids to the good stuff.
12 New Mexico Misses Babies 'R' Us
Bad news for Santa Fe when they ask, "Will babies r us come back.” If Toys R’ Us is anything to go by… no. Totally no. That ship has sailed and gone out of business. The great news is there are plenty of places to buy baby gear from and probably plenty aren’t ginormous corporations. A little research goes a long way in supporting small businesses owned by families. But yeah, anything “R Us” has probably gone the way of the dinosaurs and the dodos. Sorry if you weren’t expecting that.
11 North Dakota: Why Does My Child Keep Getting Pinkeye?
We return to a case of so many possible explanations and only one question. North Dakota wondering, "why does my child keep getting pinkeye” is all of us. Why? How? Will it ever end? Look — probably. These things can’t go on forever and it’s definitely time for a talk about hand washing and not poking your own eye after playing in the sandbox. Or just a discussion about germs in general and the first few steps towards being hygienic. The point is, there are ways to handle this issue. But also, ew — sorry.
10 Ohio Doesn't Understand Fevers
Some parents were born to take care of their little one's runny nose or blistering forehead and some are still getting accustomed to what’s even happening. Sure, keep the cartoons going and make sure the little one is stocked with plenty of fluids but, like — can we discuss how being a parent also became being a low-key nurse? That’s why Ohio googled, "Why does my child have a fever?” so often. Why?! Not the why of a rational adult so much as that pleading why of someone being plunged into an abyss. Give me any reason!
9 Oklahoma Doesn't Want To Hold Onto The Carseat For Too Long
Car seats are like grammar in that everyone has to know how they work and no one really does. Size, age, and class? Are we talking about amateur wrestling or baby car seats? How do I know when to retire a car seat? Can it be handed down from one child to another and please, oh please, let the answer be yes so we can save a few bucks and remain safe! The answer is always more complex than any of those, so when Oklahoma asked "when to buy a bigger car seat?” they most likely got plenty of answers.
8 Oregon Would Like Their Children To Have Original Thoughts
Children are adorable and, let’s be totally honest, pretty annoying. Look, it’s a tall order to be a tiny little creature whose body is still learning to obey their will and then also have to learn how to be speaking, walking around human. Fair enough. But Oregon wasn’t the only one to google "why does my child repeat words.” Just the one who did the most. They said what we all wonder — why? Sure, because they’re learning. But on a more spiritual level, why?!
7 Rhode Island Takes Halloween Very Seriously
It’s so exciting to introduce little ones to the holidays and all manners of traditions and favorite movies or foods. And it's also really difficult because who knows when a movie will become just a tiny bit too adult and scare them — that’s no fun for anyone. Rhode Island might be a tiny state, but they voiced a larger-than-life question by asking, "Halloween movies family friendly.” Good thing there are people whose profession is denoting family friend movies from the rest. We just want a good time.
6 South Carolina: What Are Symptoms Of RSV?
All of us are caught in a constant limbo of wondering what’s totally normal in the weird life stage that is childhood and what exactly counts as a symptom. That’s all parenting- witnessing weirdness and hoping it’s just normal weirdness. South Carolina was wondering, "What are symptoms of RSV?” but, like, so was everyone else. What’s a normally weird thing to be doing (like eating boogers) and what’s an indication of something else? Just be clear about that! There’s enough to worry about!
5 South Dakota Can't Have Nice Things
Everyone wants a white couch and no one really is ready for a child to leave anywhere near a white couch. It’s obvious that when South Dakota Google searched "Why does my child [break] things?” it was after a whole lot of frustrating experiences. It might be an overly simple explanation but honestly, breaking things is fun. You're not allowed to as an adult but as a child, you don’t know that. So you do it. Because it’s fun. Yeah, it doesn’t help at all but that’s the most likely explanation. Sorry about that and sorry about your expensive vases - you won’t make that mistake again.
4 Utah Curious About Baby Anatomy
Everyone knows newborns have some weird amount of fused bones and even more left to solidify. It's some weird number that doctors know and the rest of us just don’t have the mental bandwidth to keep track of. Utah wanted to know, "do babies have kneecaps.” Who knows and more importantly, who cares? I mean, we care because those little knees matter but also like… just be careful. Babies probably do? Or don’t? Get some sleep and stop wondering this. Whatever the real answer is, it's probably weird.
3 Vermont: Do Babies Need Dental Insurance?
Back to how weird dental work and babies and (even more weird) the two when put together are - Vermont, like the rest of us, wanted desperately to know if, "do babies need dental insurance.” Do they? How does health insurance even work? We all know it should be more simple but have no idea where to start. It probably should start with a baby’s dental insurance - that shouldn’t need to exist, right? Help kids and keep it simple - that feels difficult to disagree with.
2 Wyoming: Free Range Parenting
Wyoming’s got a whole bunch of empty space, and its top parenting question reflects that. The inhabitants of the alphabetically last state asked, "free-range parenting” either because they understood the value of distance (and so would you if the nearest city were Cheyenne) or because its how they were already raising the chickens. Jokes aside, I’m very jealous of those fresh eggs, and it’s so important to keep your mind open when it comes to types of parenting. That’s why there are so many questions!
1 Alaska Wants To Tote Babies Around The Right Way
Oh, Alaska, the closest state in the USA to the surface of the moon. What, that sounds like a stretch? Well, the moon is cold and uninhabited. Who else does that sound like? Yup, Alaska. Thank you, and goodnight. Alaska kept it simple with their question of the year: "What is the best baby carrier for newborns?” It’s all about brand and budget, but nonetheless, it’s a very relevant question. Any newborn will tell you: You need mom’s body heat to stay warm in those Alaska days. And nights.