Snips and snails, and puppy dog tails, right? It’s not all nursery rhyme hype, folks. Little boys can be a force to be reckoned with. A blessing for sure, moms all wonder when they’re told it’s a boy whether the fables about their dirty fingernails and dirty mouths will come true. The answer is a resounding yes!
Every mother expects that the journey through parenthood will throw her some curve balls. If she wasn’t a tomboy herself, she might have to acclimate a bit to boy things. Those who aren’t particularly fans of sports might end up with a little leaguer. Those who are OCD about keeping their houses in order may find themselves looking forward to the day that their son finally remembers to wear deodorant.
It’s true that life with boys is unpredictable. It’s a challenge. It will drive many mothers to their wit’s end trying to get through to their stubborn sons about hygiene and the importance of honestly and morals. It’s not that boys aren’t born with the same internal guide to do the right thing that girls are. It’s that they are far more compelled to give into the temptation of their wants. That’s where you come in, Mom.
15 Pee-Pee Preoccupation
Believe it or not, little boys often come right on out of the womb clutching their crotch in their hand. Parents usually find it endearing upon initial sight, but this behavior is just a mere glimpse into what the future has in store for the parents of boys.
It’s not even uncommon for parents to have pictures of their little men at the time of birth, holding onto their winkies like it was going to fall off if they didn’t. Both males and females discover their genitals while still in the womb. It’s perfectly normal for them to touch them and there’s nothing sexual about it at that point.
After birth, they may not be terribly interested in anything but breastmilk. Again, not sexual. Sometime during their first year though, they may start taking an interest again. This isn’t about masturbation or even sexual sensation. Rather, it’s about a part of their body that is normally covered up. So, when it’s exposed, they get curious. That’s all.
14 Hey Little Sister
If you have a little girl in the house, too, it’s inevitable that at some point your little man will ask what on Earth happened to his sister’s pee-pee? I mean, she had to have had one, right? Where did it go? Is his going to go away? Will it hurt?
You can expect all these questions and more when it comes to little boys and their curiosity. They’ll be pretty attached to their private parts — literally. So, it’s not unreasonable that they might worry about the possibility that they’ll have to be removed, or fall off, or other ridiculous thoughts that run through the mind of a little kid.
If your son does ask you what happened to his sister’s penis, it’s only fair to discuss the topic in a mature manner. More and more parents are going against the grain of their parents’ ways of parenting when it comes to things of this nature. They use the correct anatomical terms. They are honest with their kids about sexual health and bodily anatomy and autonomy from an early age. It turns out, it produces really solid, smart, sexually comfortable individuals.
13 Stinky Baby!
At the heart of a man, there is probably gas. It’s true with your husband, did you expect differently from your son? Little boys seem to be pretty in awe of the things their bodies are capable of. They love to fart. Poop is their best friend. Some of them never grow out of this.
If we’re being really technical and using all the correct terms, we might inform our little men that their flatulence is all a part of the digestive process. When they break down their food and push it through their intestines, methane gas is produces from their waste. In truth, most little boys won’t be swayed from their interest in poop and farts, and they won’t be interested at all in the reasons why it occurs. They just know that it does, and they love it every time!
12 Comparing Kids
If you happen to have a daughter already by the time your little man comes along, get ready. Those two may have been created equal, but they are far from the same. Even in instances of having a girl secondary to a boy, the change is phenomenal. There will be good times, and bad. Some of the bad may not actually be so awful, but it could seem like it to moms who are accustomed to sweet little girls who rarely speak out of turn or make much of a mess.
Boys are rambunctious. They are busy, when they’re playing at least. They like to play hard. The rough and tumble boy is not a type of boy. He’s just a boy. They are wrestlers. They are boxers. They will generally model themselves after the man of the house, just as little girls model themselves after their mothers. So, if Dad isn’t exactly sitting around the house practicing yoga, but would rather park his hind in front of the television and scream at the coaches during halftime, you can expect the same from your son to be likely.
11 Call The Plumber
There may be nothing little boys are better at than clogging up the toilet. Before they’re even potty-trained, they’re probably going to flush a block or toy down that commode. Cha-ching! By the time they know how to properly use it, you might feel relieved, even though you’ll likely sit down on a wet seat every time you have to use it.
In addition, you’ll realize that your school-aged boy can produce bowel movements as large as his dad’s sometimes. Goodness! The thing about little kids isn’t always the size of their business, though. It’s the insane amount of toilet paper they think they need to clean their bottoms! Understand that they’ll need help cleaning off for a good while. When they no longer do, wet wipes are still recommended!
10 Oh, The Filth!
Listen, little boys are not housekeepers. They are not keen on keeping things clean, and that includes themselves. They will always have a funky smell to their heads. They will swear they used shampoo, but you’ll never smell it. They’ll always have fingernails that need cutting with dirt shoved underneath them, too.
When it’s time for a bath, expect your tub to need a good cleaning after they’re done. They won’t pick up their laundry and dirty towels on the floor. Their room will be disorganized. Their bed might be made if you bark at them about it, but only the top cover that you can see. You’ll find smudges in their undies and candy wrappers and socks shoved into the corners of the couch. That’s life with boys. Get ready!
9 The Emergency Room
Notably, not every injury your child incurs will require you to rush them off to the ER, but if you do end up there, it’s far more likely that it’s because of your son than your daughter. Sticks, stones and broken bones. That’s what little boys bring with them.
Yes, it will be scary the first few times, but moms of boys learn to roll with the punches. While it’s hard to imagine your sweet, little baby being harmed in any way, one day he will be jumping off of picnic tables and diving boards in an endless pursuit of adventure.
This is a good thing! When they aren’t afraid of getting hurt, they’ll experience far more that life has to offer. Encourage that wild side of their personality. Follow alongside them. No, not hovering over them. Just join in on the experience. It passes by so quickly.
8 He’s Got No Balls
Don’t worry! They’re in there. Ever heard of the nub theory? This theory aims to confirm the gender of a baby with an ultrasound performed at roughly 12 weeks along during your pregnancy. It relies on the angle measurement between the nub — the protrusion at their private parts — and their spine when they are lying flat. A bigger angle means boy. A smaller angle is obviously girl.
A lot of people are put off by this because both babies have nubs in the first place. It’s true. Girls and boys both start out with a protrusion. In girls, it moves inward and the labia swells up. In boys, it remains upright and the region which would be the labia migrate to the scrotum region.
Girls develop ovaries that stay inside of the pelvic cavity at this time, and boys develop testes that remain inside of the scrotum. Those testicles will remain up high until closer to birth. Most baby boys who are born at or beyond term will already have descended testicles. If they don’t, rest assured they’ll generally move down by no later than six months of age.
7 Autism, ADHD And More
While these are certainly not gender-based disorders, they are more common in males than females. Death is a bigger concern among males, too, and it has nothing to do with their adventurous spirit and inclination to be injured. In fact, we have no idea why males are the weaker sex when it comes to health and survival. For instance, stillborn babies are 10 times more likely to be male than female.
When it comes to disorders like autism spectrum disorder, males are affected far more frequently, and it’s because they are more likely to receive gene mutations passed on through DNA from their mothers than females are. Interestingly, mothers carry 60 percent of the mutations passed on to their children while only 40 percent come from fathers. Still, the mothers aren’t impacted by them. The jury is still out on why exactly females are more resilient and less affected by these genes that seem to impair the neurology of boys far more easily.
6 Little Warriors
Boys are adventurous. They want to feel the gust of wind in their hair. They like the smell of musk when they use their muscles. They long for summer at the beach so they can crash into a few waves, the Fourth of July so they can marvel at Dad setting off fireworks wondering when they’ll get to help, and more.
Boys love the element of danger. No, they don’t need to be put in harm’s way to let them enjoy that fact of life. They like sitting on the edge of the cliff, but if the cliff is only a foot or two high, who’s counting? Buy them the hoverboard — if they’ve earned it. Let them play sports. Set them free and give them the space and time to be a little boy. It will benefit you in the long run, because they need this time each day to run out all of that excess energy so they go to sleep well for Mommy.
5 His Pee Goes Weeeee
You might’ve noticed by now in your interactions with your own brothers or even your hubby that they are quite impressed with themselves when they can shoot a steady stream of — ew — urine in a specific direction they’re aiming for.
It really is impressive. Especially since they can manage to write their name in the snow in the back yard, but they can’t keep it in the toilet when they are simply trying to pee and flush it away. Funny how that works. It’s almost as if they have an inborn desire to spread their pee as far and as wide as they possibly can, marking their territory wherever they go like dogs.
Yes, it’s quite likely that your little tyke will learn sooner or later that he can aim that garden hose (he should be so lucky) in any direction he likes and it will spray away directly at his intended target. Again, as long as the target isn’t the toilet bowl. Then it doesn’t work.
4 Bad Little Boys
Boys will be boys, they say. What does that mean exactly? Often, it’s a phrase that is used to sort of explain away negative behavior on the part of a male. We are really doing them a disservice when we do this. Not only are we not holding them accountable for their behavior, but we are implying that boys are inherently bad — so bad that it can’t be fixed or managed and should just be excused and swept under the rug. What kind of message does that send about how we feel about boys?
You should expect that at some point in your journey as a mother to a boy, you may complain or vent to a family member or friend about your son(s). Their response may be, “boys will be boys”, and you have the golden opportunity in those moments to tell them how wrong they are about boys and become part of the movement to change the way we treat the male gender. Boys are not bad! Lazy? Yes! Dirty? Yes! But not bad!
3 Intact Matters
A lot of moms who have never had a baby boy before have no idea what they’re in for when it comes to circumcision. No one really talks about it, and that’s a big part of the problem. Once thought to be a supreme measure of preventative healthcare, circumcision rates have been declining for years now. In 2009, just 32.9 percent of male neonates were circumcised in the United States. By the time today’s baby boys are teenagers in the locker room, it is those who are circumcised that will be the minority.
But it’s not all about kids making fun of one another. It’s about bodily autonomy, and the respect for our sons that we do not have the right to consent to cosmetic surgery on their genitals. The foreskin has over 20,000 nerve endings in it. Removing it is the equivalent to removing a female’s clitoral hood. Men indeed lose sexual pleasure, as well as lubrication and protective measures when they are circumcised.
The majority of insurance companies are no longer covering the procedure, either — noting it as cosmetic surgery and not medically necessary. The American Academy of Pediatrics revised their statement on it and no longer recommends routine infant circumcision.
Parents are often ill-prepared for this subject. They assume that because Dad was circumcised that the baby should be, but do we perform breast enhancements or reductions on our daughters if their breasts aren’t the same size as their mother’s? What about vaginoplasty so their labia match? Many parents don’t even think about circumcision until the doctor asks whether or not they want it, and by then it’s often far too late to make an informed decision.
2 Baby Boners!
Oh yes, there will be erections. Don’t be surprised if you see one of these before you even leave the hospital to head home with your little one. It’s very common and it has nothing to do with sexual pleasure. Rather, circulation to the region can have a big impact on their private parts. It’s common to find your son experiencing an erection in the morning or after long nap. Morning wood isn’t just for big boys. It’s also not unusual for them to get an erection when their bladder is full. So, you might want to take cover.
Baby boys begin having erections while they’re still in their momma’s belly. They don’t do anything about it, nor do they know that anyone ever does. It comes and goes as it pleases and is not anything to be concerned about unless there is pain, swelling or redness, which signals another problem is at play.
1 Now For The Good Part
Just when you thought everything about having a boy was going to be brutal, think again. From the battle against your husband to keep him intact to discussing the importance of protected sex someday, you’ll have some difficult moments with your son. But in between those moments, you’ll be surrounded with love by this sweet, little boy who adores his momma and his daddy more than anything in the whole world.
He’ll spend his days playing in the yard trying to catch a butterfly for Mom and plucking dandelion weeds for her to toss into the mason jar on the kitchen window sill. When Mommy is upset after hearing some bad news, his empathetic side will come out and he’ll shower her with love and affection. Little boys carry very big hearts.
Sources: Medical Daily, Fox News, CIRP