It's Valentine's Day week! Before I had kids, Valentine's Day was all about lovey-dovey, mushy-gushy feelings. I expected gifts and pampering without fail. For the most part, my boyfriends did a good job with gifts. Over the years I've received jewelry, flowers, food, and even some heartfelt cards and mixtapes. Even still, nothing compares to getting a Valentine from your little babies!
The unconditional love of your child comes into your life and redefines what love even looks like. Romantic love can sort of pale in comparison if I'm being completely honest! But it is possible - and important - to keep romantic love alive in your partnership! It's not always easy. Kids take up so much of our used-to-be-free time as parents. But if you make romance a priority now, the investment will pay off ten-fold later. Now that I'm a mom, romance looks a lot like hiring a babysitter!
Make Date Night Official
If you don't plan to have a date night, it will fall to the wayside. Just like every other part of your relationship, putting in effort makes the end result so much more enjoyable! So, yes - it might be annoying that date night now requires pre-planning and babysitters. But the work is worth it! Remember: everyone else is going to have reservations and a babysitter for Valentine's Day dates, too. So reach out to your sitter early, make a reservation at a nice place, and do it in January! Most babysitters love a paying customer, so book them in advance.
Schedule Sexy Times
This Valentine's Day, don't forget to take care of your sweetheart. Switch up your usual by making love before you go out for the evening. This helps everyone - no one is too tired or too full (or ahem, too inebriated) to participate! A mentor told my husband and me that having sex first puts everyone in a good mood for the rest of the date. I could tell you he's right, but you should try it for yourself! On a side note, scheduling in regular sex is super beneficial for any relationship - but especially helpful for those with kids.
Feel Romantic By Pampering Yourself
Parents - especially moms - rarely take time to pamper themselves. Ask your babysitter to come to pick up the kids mid-day and use the afternoon to do something that makes you feel great. This can be anything from brewing a nice cup of tea, shaving your legs, or getting a pedicure. Personally, I'd feel my best in a new outfit and a cute lipstick. Or if you want to get hyped for your date, blast some dance music and shake those hips! Whatever you do, spend a few hours to make yourself feel confident. After all, confidence is what makes mama feel sexy! Pamper yourself to get in the mental mood for the rest of your Valentine's Day romance.
In general, romance after kids is less about spontaneity and more about planning in advance. Those Valentine's day date plans are the definition of romance in the years of early parenting. Keep the love alive this February 14th by making your baby mama (or daddy!) feel as special as they truly are.